Since Orangebottle hasn't been on in a week, I'm going to put in D. Rex. Sorry, BD.
Out of nowhere, a poisoned dart strikes BD in the neck. A ninja jumps from the shadows and inspects the paralyzed and half-dead brawler. Out of nowhere, a poisoned dart strikes the ninja in the neck. Xavila jumps from the shadows and inspects both of them. The vampire she stabs with the sharpened butt of her fancy asian polearm, burning him to a crisp. She looks at the fallen brawler more closely. As s/he dies, the illusion flickers on and off. BD gasps, with hir last breath, "Save... the... world... Stone... SHINY..." Xivala looks confused. And then, as BD dies and the illusion fades completely, revealing a hideous man with spiky hands wearing a dress, a specter appears over the corpse. A specter of a hooded man. "Oh, dear. And I had such high hopes for hir... You'll do," he says, looking at Xivala. "Take those gloves there. You can planejump with those. You need to save the multiverse. Go to that glowing stone in the big pyramid. Touch it and save the world. I'll tell you what else to do later."
"YOU SHALL NOT ---
...
Actually, this is pointless. I'm not a Maia."
What's pointless? Hurry up and destroy that thing.
Planejump to the university. If possible, planejump back to the front entrance of the castle.
Too much of a hassle beating this thing. You focus on your ring, and then on the school. (5) You land in the meeting room with the table. There is absolutely nothing interesting happening. It's like you're not a hero or something. Time to go back to the castle, you guess... (6) You land right at the front door of the castle. There's a young couple over near the garden. Singing. Something about "A light... In the Daaarkness..." and then they get eaten by a large plant. Not really a shame. They looked like a SLUT and an ASSHOLE. You have no idea where those insults came from. You didn't even know them! Oh well. You open the front door and walk in. You hear music coming from a parlor nearby. You can't really hear it clearly, but you can pick out the voice of the lich.
Yeah, that looks like a beast of old alright.
Inquire to the lich if he knows of a stone somewhere.
After you glare at the little gnome, leading to a lot of cursing, you ask the lich about the stone. He says, "Arr, I knows about the stone ye be seekin'. But ye'll have ta fight me for th' knowledge. And f'r the ship. If ye defeat me in a battle, just th' two 'f us, man ta man - or lich ta orc - I'll tell ye where th' stone is. I'll even take ye there. In th' ship. Which'll be yers." He leads you abovedecks to the center of the deck, and you face off after he gives you your weapons back. His minions circle the two of you, and you prepare for the duel.
Miniboss Fight! (1 vs 3) He gets the first blow! He lunges at you with his sword, (3) (dodge:6) but you leap over him and swipe at his back. (4+1+1) (dodge:5-1) You hit him in the (BP:6) neck, and (damage:5+1+1) cut his head off. That was quick. Or so you thought, as he picks up his head and places it on his neck. The wound heals instantly. Oh, gods.
Milton Waddums? What kind of name is that? Ax thought, glancing at the demon's name-tag. "I'm not trying to take your stapler, man," he said quietly. "Hey, can you tell me which way the stairs are?" He thought for a moment to try to come up with a convincing cover story. "I was hired to check the CEO's traps and make sure they're working properly, but no one bothered giving me a map of the building. Any help would be appreciated," he said, indicating how appreciated by laying 15 GP on the desk.
(3+1(bribery!)+1(Trap Master))You say that thing that you wanted to say, and put the cash on his desk. It disappears quickly into a drawer, and the little demon gets up. He leads you down the hall to the nearest stairs. They go up. And up. And up. For about three stories on the outside, but about twenty on the inside. Damn. Time to start climbing. (6+1+1) You notice a lot of traps in the stairway, and begin methodically disarming them and rearming most of them behind you. They're very sophisticated. Especially the ones that you took components from. Like that deadly poison. Or the one with the self-propelled throwing discs. Those are a nice addition to your arsenal.
ENGINEER LIEK A BAWSS. I'm thinking a sonic demolition device, like the ones on Stephinian Battleaxe warships. They use 'em to destroy planets.
Also get some shades, so I can compel my enemies to deal with it while the Emet fires on them.
Also recruit/construct some robot soldiers.
If I'm missing next turn, just repeat this action until I come back.
EDIT:
Oh, before I forget, grab an electric guitar too.
You have pretty much guaranteed that you'll be fighting a dragon. Or maybe the
Tarrasque.
After a round of high-fives, you grab Iali and start the buildin'. Oh, yes, the buildin'. The Sonic Cannon first. (1+1+1+1) (4+2) You don't do that well, but Iali shines. +1 to power, usefulness. (Power:2+1) It's not that powerful, but it's not weak either. (size:1) And it fits into your hand. A normally ship-mounted cannon. In your hand. Ever seen Men In Black? Like the Cricket from that. Yeah. (usefulness:3+1) It won't break unless, you know, a dragon breathes fire on it or something. (efficiency:6) And it stores ambient noise in a special sound container. With magic. (4) You find some cool shades, and weld a nose onto your head so you can hold it. (6) You find the best guitar ever. This thing is powered by a trapped lightning elemental. It augments the player's skills at playing guitar. It is the most beautiful thing you've ever seen. You decide to weaponize it by mounting your sound cannon on it. It gives it more power, and more badass potential. I bet it would be cooler if you shaped lifeban into an axe and then attached the whole guitar thing to it.
Briefly High-Five Fred, Tell him to keep doing what he is doing THEN GET THE BUGS OFF OF ME!
After a cool high-five, you try to figure out how to get the bugs off you. (3) You decide that your flamebreath is the best way. (6) You breathe a blast of fire on your leg, killing the bugs. (5) And leaving your leg completely unscathed. Like a boss. Fred takes aim at the monster, and fires his cannon. (6) (dodge:3) He fires. More flaming metal shrapnel. More destruction caused to the bug beast's (BP:2) torso. (damage:5+1) The bug beast loses a huge number of insects. It's about the size of a dwarf now. It growls, and forms into a cloud, which flies at you! (6) (dodge:6) Awesome happens. The beast forms itself into an arrow shape, and flies at your head, but you leap over it, shooting your flamebreath down. (6) (dodge:5) You Burn the beast, (damage:2) but unfortunately don't damage it.
Jesus christ. Did you sacrifice a virgin to the RNG or something? That's eight sixes or fives in one turn.
Statuses:
Species: Mutant
Description: A "Being" That stands like a man, the size of a man, but covered with horrible burns and an alchemists robe
Profession: Alchemist/Mad Scientest
Background: He once was a man. Atleast he thinks so. But what he does remember is his knack for mixing up chemicals and herbs, always trying to find that perfect mix. But he has suffered his fair share of accidents in the lab
Home Plane: Astral Plane
Abilities:
Master Alchemist,
Mad Alchemist,
Astral Denizen,
Well-ReadMutations:
Alchemical Immunities,
Four Arms,
Inventory:
Bottle Sling,
Good Chemistry Set,
Leather Robes,
Phial of enchanted gas,
Doctor's Bag, Plague Doctor Mask, Iron Dagger, 5 gp,
SAM, Infinity doses of
Wizard's Wallbanger, Mild Hallucinogen (10 doses),
SwordSpells:
Spined Hands,
FireboltName: Axolisin Sathael. He prefers being called Ax or Sin since he thinks it's awesome.
Species: Tiefling
Description: Short, pale, and skinny. He stands about 5'5 and 120 pounds. His hair and eyes are pure black and his pure white skin has light gray spots across it. His horns are goat-like. He spends a lot of time moping and figures since he's just so mistreated he can do whatever he wants.
Profession: Thief
Background: He's been kicked around his entire life as you might expect and resorted to thievery since Tieflings are branded as thieves and untrustworthy anyway. He's very small time and hasn't progressed much beyond mugging, purse stealing, pickpocketing, and robbing the poor.
Home Plane: Plane of Shadow
Inventory:
Steel Daggers,
Throwing Daggers,
Good Lockpicks,
Magic Ring,
Black Leather Armor,
Deadly Poison,
Self-propelled throwing discs, 60 gp
Abilities:
Burglar,
Good Eyes,
Denizen of Shadow,
Fancy Horns,
Trap MasterHealth: Fine
Species: Golem
Description: Created as a result of DRUNK THAUMATOLOGY!. Was intended to have humanlike personality and intellgence. Doesn't talk much, but isn't stupid. Has no goals of his own besides survival, goes around helping people with various things for lack of a better purpose. Will do anything asked of him unless he has a reason not to (if it conflicts with an existing goal or his basic morality). Lawful Good (as in lawful as the opposite of chaotic). Extremely logical and unemotional. Dislikes entropic behavior. Is good with machines (clockwork and a bit of early steam power, I guess).
When he does talk, it sounds something like the above paragraph.
Profession: None. See above. Requires no food and builds his own shelter, and has very little interest in material goods.
Background: See description.
Home Plane: Material Plane.
Inventory:
Lifeban,
Toolkit, 15 gp,
Magitek Manuals, Foot Jets (5 continuous turns/20 hops),
Sonar Cannon Guitar., Cool Shades
Abilities:
Pneumatic Joints,
Simple Personality,
Material Plane Denizen,
Oh Captain My Captain,
Armor PlatingHealth: Fine
This character brought to you thanks to the wonderful racial descriptions.
Species: Aasimar
Description: Lawful Neutral, almost Lawful Stupid. He firmly believes in the tenets of his faith, and is willing to die to uphold them. Was split into Nirur and Torir, god and evil respectively. A god of good put them back together, and they now are essentially one person with two minds.
Profession: Paladin.
Background: His people believe themselves to be the only true guardians of the material plane; the best way to help the mortal inhabitants of said plane is by not touching anything. Obviously this is what The Creator had in mind, and any who meddle in the plane, and therefore blaspheme The Creator, are to be punished severely.
After three decades of military service (doing nothing), he has been sent out as a sort of test to determine the extent of the planer distortion, fix it if possible, find the perpetrators, deliver justice, then report back.
Home Plane: Ethereal Plane.
Abilities:
Nirur:
Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking,
Righteous Fury,
Torir:
Puppy Kicker,
Evil BastardBoth:
Ethereal Denizen,
Split PersonalityInventory:
Variably Holy Longsword,
Variably Holy Symbol Full Plate Armor,
Enchanted Ring, 50 gp Scary Dagger
Name: Jo'Ldza (Big Jo)
Species: Orc
Description: We'sn orcs may be deesa jerks, but we's still hassda jobs. I'mn A big ork. Got'sa bald head, with red eyes and wella build a'ms. I'sa been a kaptain for more dan' twenn'y yea's. I 'elp keep the balance wit' mah krew.
Profession: Kaptain of an orc sailing ship
Background: Grew up on a sailing boat with his brother, who was also a kaptain. inherited kaptain'ism and crew from his brother when he died.
Home Plane: Water Plane
Abilities:
Sailor,
Swashbuckler Water Plane Denizen,
Dinghy PilotInventory:
Good Rapier,
Grappling Hook,
Pirate Outfit,
Magic Coin Necklace,
Paralyzing Poison (3 uses), Hand Cannon (no powder), 20 gp
Name: Xibalba Razormane
Species: Tiefling
Description: 5'4" Female 120 Lbs, murky red skin/scales?, black eyes. Tail has natural nail spikes through the end, with a red rag tied over it to mask them. Armed with a dranaginat and two sets of poison-tipped throwing spikes set to each wrist. She normally wears a strappy black banded leather armour, knee-high boots with spikes on the knees. She covers the top of her long black hair and most of her horns with a red cloth like a hood. As utility items she carries a bag of coated caltrops, a flash-bang, a small pot, and a wine-skin.
Profession: Rangeresque, part time bandit. Whatever keeps her stomach filled and her pockets filled in coins.
Background: Took to the forests from a young age. Fell in love with the flame, and chaos, so a lot of them burnt down at first. Learnt more neutral balance of life, then twisted it chaotic for her own means. If anything disturbs her peace she may kill it, she may let it pass. She takes what she wants and doesn't care about future consequences so long as her personal world is well arranged in her mind. She may burn down the whole forest and call it nature's balance as trees will grow back faster than ever in the fertile lands rich with the blood of her vanquished enemies. Studies plant life for poison tipping her weapons, the toxins make the people feel like they are burning alive, savage hunter (overhunts and wastes a lot, like may kill an entire herd of a farmer's sheep in bloodlust for one single mutton). Not opposed to eating sentient creatures.
Home Plane: Plane of Fire
Inventory:
Decent Fancy Asian Polearm,
Throwing Spikes, [-1 to anything you could want to do with them]Rusty, Broken Caltrops[/acronym],
Average Leather ArmorAbilities:
Fire Plane Native,
Spiky Tail,
Wanted in twelve sectorsAllies:
You kind of made his house into your flying machine, so he decided to tag along. He is now going all fangirl over Schilcote, who he sees as almost a demigod of mechanics.
Abilities:
Master Mechanic,
Old ManInventory: The entire contents of his house, which you made into a flying machine.
You saved them from some pirates. Yay!
Abilities:
Powder Monkeys,
Kids,
Air Plane NativesInventory:Clothes
A mindless cannon robot the size of a man. Has a shoulder-mounted badass cannon.
Abilities: Never runs out of gunpowder.
Inventory:
12 corrosive gas shells, 25 normal cannonballs
Vehicles:
The house part belongs to the gnome mechanic, the flying mechanism belongs to Schilcote, the fueling system was made by Riccto. It runs on air and can easily break the sound barrier. It will almost never break. Schilcote can planejump the ship, but will have -1 on all actions in the next turn.
First floor: Workshop, door outside, kitchen
Second Floor: Nirur's room (one cannon - left), Spare bedroom (one cannon - right), Engine room
Third floor: Spare bedroom, cockpit (two cannons - forward), Iali Boltcut's room, ladder to roof
Roof:
Pouting TieflingAx's "room",
Badass FlameTurret, Two swivelling cannons
Bought by Schilcote to keep Big Jo happy. Flies as fast as you can row it (with the orc alone? Pretty fast.), enchantment is permanent.
Vortices Found: Stones Activated:
Plane of Death √
Abyss √
Plane of Water √
Mechanus √
Celestia √ √
Wizard's Tower √
Generic Asian Dojo √
Author
Topic: RTPJ: Tis belongs to Schil now. Have fun. (Read 87706 times)