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Author Topic: The Dwarven Race III - Race Two, start.  (Read 19910 times)

SHAD0Wdump

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #60 on: July 06, 2010, 10:12:41 am »

I just thought up something for the parts list. How about heavy items? Like an anchor, or maybe boulders?

May we also be able to purchase raw materials, like iron?

I've got a few ideas that could use such items.

EDIT: That's a idea, just iron bars, these would be very heavy as well as being a raw material.
« Last Edit: July 06, 2010, 03:01:23 pm by SHAD0Wdump »
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Wimdit

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #61 on: July 06, 2010, 06:49:23 pm »

Oh, now that's a good idea. Grappling hook already counts as an anchor, I think, even if it's not heavy. But I'll draw up a list of raw materials for your perusal later on.
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Frelock

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #62 on: July 06, 2010, 07:54:09 pm »

Have my henchdwarf throw a kitten onto Igor's face. whereupon it should maul him viciously.

Hah, you clearly do not understand that Igor is as adorable as the kittens, and they shall accept him generously.

Open the windows to blow the spiders out.  Yell at Igor to jump onto anyone going faster than Para
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SHAD0Wdump

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #63 on: July 08, 2010, 09:42:52 am »

This is too good to be on the second page!
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Wimdit

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #64 on: July 09, 2010, 06:56:16 am »

Turn 3

IronyOwl
(3)(1) The stranglers, while intimidating, are not particularly adept in the art of mauling things. While they inflict a few gashes and tear an ear slightly, the elephants' thick skin confounds them. Two start fighting among themselves over who gets to eat them, seemingly ignoring the fact that there is more meat on those elephants than either of them could ever eat before it started rotting. (5) They somehow manage to gut one another simultaneously with their bare hands. They collapse, twitching. (5) You do an amazingly accurate imitation of an elephant's hunting cry. The two conscious elephants are roused to action, (3) injuring one of the remaining stranglers with their tusks. Now for healing. (5) Not only do you manage to stop the blind elephant dying with palm fronds or something, you somehow transplant the eyes of a dead strangler into his eye sockets by tying them neatly to the optic nerves. You now have an elephant with tiny red eyes, who looks even more like an unstoppable engine of death than before. You ignore the kobold completely, because you are a very focused person. (6) Surgery that should be completely impossible finished, you wake the elephant up by reminding it rather forcefully of its unstoppable nature. Perhaps that was unwise. You have awoken the FURY OF THE PACHYDERM! (1) Unfortunately, its tiny brain can't take that much fury after all the previous excitement. It promptly keels over. But man, is it going to be furious when it wakes up.

techno65535
(2) You fail completely to inspire loyalty in your henchdwarves. But that's okay because they weren't actually traitors. Your yelling has them slightly perturbed, however. (5) You seem to be very good at using the promise of victuals to motivate your crew. Henchdwarves Gamma and Delta wrestle a strangler into the cage trap fearlessly, and proceed to replace the cage before the other can react. (1) Eventually, the other one gets his act together and charges at henchdwarf Delta. Gamma sticks his foot out and trips him. He tumbles straight into the newly-primed trap.

You now have a pair of evil monkeys. Good for you, I guess?

The Ramstein collides with you! You escape damage, but you're knocked off-course... (4) You wrestle your car back onto the road with few difficulties.

Errol
Your spirit and your fortress soar on the wings of eagles! (6) The bonobos... also soar on the wings of eagles. Eagle. They're stealing one of your eagles! There are but two eagles remaining to hold you up. (1) The sentient eagle shakes its head and flies up for another go to rescue its brother from the depredations of the undead. It does a one-eighty degree loop this time, and hits its head on the very same section of amour plating. (6) Your henchdwarf, meanwhile, continues his quest to display initiative. He grabs hold of the harness as the monkeys release it, climbs up the rope with his teeth clenched, and engages in thrilling hand-to-hand combat with the zombies, eventually throwing them both off. Flushed with victory, he rides the winds joyously and snatches a skeletal chimp from the air before he realizes that the eagle he's riding is probably better used in actually pulling the fortress. He starts heading back, with a dead monkey thrashing in the eagle's grip.

SHAD0Wdump
Bahaha! (5) Your driving skills are impeccable. Your henchdwarf pours more booze on the fire, and you artfully nose your rocket machine over to the other side of the road, where your nemesis waits. (1 + 1 - 1) You... bounce right off him. Lousy goddamn stupid steel spikes. It's like they're made of rubber. You knocked him off-course a bit, but he managed to recover. (5) You praise your henchdwarf's honesty as you drive. His eyes widen. How did you find that out? He is now convinced you can read his thoughts! He attends to the rocket, severely shaken. He will never conspire against you again. (1) However, he is too shaken to make efficient use of booze. You continue at the same pace as the General Lee. This won't end well...

Paranatural
(1) The spiders turn about and run in terror. Or they would be running in terror, but they have [NOFEAR] so they must be running away for their own inscrutable purposes. But they're spiders, they don't have many purposes beyond food, and you're food to these particular spiders. So who knows why they're running. Anyway, (2) you set your cats on the spiders but they recoil in fear because phantom spiders are scary and don't die easily so they sometimes bite while in the digestive tract. (3) You set a kitten on Igor, which meets with slightly more success, but Igor is scary too. Plus he's cute. He's less cute after his face is scratched though.

Your kittens are now grown.

Stray cat (Tame) has given birth to kittens.
Stray cat (Tame) has given birth to a kitten.


wolfchild
(1) Turns out being dead doesn't do very much for your depth perception. Every single one of the chimpanzees trying to swing onto your vehicle falls to the ground, and a couple of them fall apart from the impact. You are victorious! (1) But your pathetic attempts to calm the eagles merely enrage them. (6) They begin tearing apart your vessel in search of treats! Great rents begin to appear in the armour. (1) The kobold's hiding spot is revealed, and he makes a desperate attempt to strike back before he is devoured whole. You're in trouble. What are you going to do now, Urist?

Frelock
(6) The phantom spiders infest every nook, cranny and fissure in your vehicle. Before you can even open your nonexistent windows, there are spiders crawling all over you! You flinch, and a couple of them are startled. You have been bitten, and are paralyzed. That's not good. Igor looks on helplessly, but Paranatural's cats are too slow to match you and nobody is going any faster. On the bright side, your engine requires no input from you. Unfortunately, you are listing slightly to the right. If this trend continues, then in a little while your vehicle won't be looking as pristine as it does now. You may not choose actions for yourself at present, but Igor can still act as normal.

Comments
Dear me. Some of you guys are pretty unlucky. The eagle guys aren't doing too well. And this vendetta between Shadow and techno is going to have dire consequences, eventually.

Course info
Tropical Moist Broadleaf Forest
Heavily Forested
Terrifying

Code: [Select]
    2 1 3   1
S _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ +
  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 _ 10
                    + __ __ __ __ __ F
                      11 12 13 14 15
Key
S = Start
F = Finish
_ = One tile
+ = Corner
Bottom Numbers = Square number
Top Numbers = Racers present on that square

Statuses

Spoiler: SHAD0Wdump - Ramstein (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: IronyOwl - Rampage (click to show/hide)
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wolfchild

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #65 on: July 09, 2010, 07:02:12 am »

Urist feeds his last kobold to the eagles, and promises them more if we arrive in the top 3 places
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IronyOwl

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #66 on: July 09, 2010, 07:19:58 am »

Urist feeds his last kobold to the eagles, and promises them more if we arrive in the top 3 places

rofl, now that's dwarven ingenuity!


Gently wake up all my elephants and get myself back on track! Also explain to the kobold that he works for me now. In a VERY threatening tone.
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Quote from: Radio Controlled (Discord)
A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

SHAD0Wdump

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #67 on: July 09, 2010, 07:46:49 am »

Blarg, smash 'em again!

Also, my henchdwarf needs a name, I'll call him Roland or something.

EDIT(response to techno's ploy): "Roland, it would sadden me to see you go over there, I was looking forward to a night out in celebration if we win."
« Last Edit: July 10, 2010, 04:27:26 pm by SHAD0Wdump »
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Frelock

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #68 on: July 09, 2010, 11:52:30 am »

Ok, so that 6 certainly would have been better spent elsewhere.  Seems like that reaction was more worthy of a 1, though...

Mentally dominate the spiders, and force them to work together to start driving.  Instruct Igor to help paranatural until he either returns to me, or paranatural attacks me.  Take good care of my henchman, Para, or you'll answer to ME!
« Last Edit: July 09, 2010, 11:56:30 am by Frelock »
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Paranatural

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #69 on: July 09, 2010, 07:17:49 pm »

Ok, so that 6 certainly would have been better spent elsewhere.  Seems like that reaction was more worthy of a 1, though...

Mentally dominate the spiders, and force them to work together to start driving.  Instruct Igor to help paranatural until he either returns to me, or paranatural attacks me.  Take good care of my henchman, Para, or you'll answer to ME!

That's because the first roll was for the enemies rather than us.

Add the kitties to the kitty powered engine so that I go faster.
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The corpses appear to be primarily concentrated under the dead cat.  - Untelligent
Mental Health 6/6. You easily comfort yourself knowing that Paranatural's Hot Stubble And Deliciously Unwashed Armpits will be  waiting for you whatever happens.

techno65535

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #70 on: July 10, 2010, 12:38:50 am »

Hrmm, maybe they're not traitors afterall...Must have been that SHADOWdump sending his own thoughts into my mind...Now there's a plan.

"HEY! Roland! Why are you working for someone who obviously thinks your a traitor to the Dwarven Cause? Hell, I bet he's planning on killing you before this race is over. Come over here, and he won't get the chance."

Put Alpha, Bravo, and Charlie (not gamma, phonetic alphabet, not greek) back on the pumps, put Delta on standby with his hammer, to break those spikes as they come near. Try to seduce Roland to join us instead.

Edit: "Roland, don't you know that parties are always more fun with more people? With him you've only got yourself and him. With us, you have 5 other people to party with."
« Last Edit: July 12, 2010, 10:55:32 pm by techno65535 »
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... while being chased by axe-welding cats in the dark.
Scratch that, throwing-axe-wielding cats in the dark.
They're cute but my god that's terrifying.
GENERATION 10: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig on any forum and add 1 to the generation. Social experiment.

SHAD0Wdump

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #71 on: July 12, 2010, 06:42:17 pm »

No, get off the second page!
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techno65535

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #72 on: July 12, 2010, 10:56:07 pm »

What second page? This is the fifth page.
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... while being chased by axe-welding cats in the dark.
Scratch that, throwing-axe-wielding cats in the dark.
They're cute but my god that's terrifying.
GENERATION 10: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig on any forum and add 1 to the generation. Social experiment.

wolfchild

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #73 on: July 12, 2010, 11:22:27 pm »

What second page? This is the fifth page.

he meant the second page of threads
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You really can both sig it.
But... That would break the laws of sigging! We can't have everyone running around with the same quotes. IT MAKES THEM UNFUNNY FASTER!

techno65535

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Re: The Dwarven Race III - Chimps and stranglers and spiders.
« Reply #74 on: July 13, 2010, 12:36:46 am »

Ah, of course. Can't allow this to fall to the second page.
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... while being chased by axe-welding cats in the dark.
Scratch that, throwing-axe-wielding cats in the dark.
They're cute but my god that's terrifying.
GENERATION 10: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig on any forum and add 1 to the generation. Social experiment.
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