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[Duke 2.0]

I don't know how common or not it is, but I understand what you're saying. 

 Thanks bro, this was kinda what I needed. I would normally be posting in the happy thread about the actual event and all the goodness of seeing my brother again, but this is becoming more and more of a frightening feeling. It also sorta cumulated to a frightening climax of despair where I realized a large part of my anxiety is from a fear of being pointless, that nobodies life would be any worse if I was not around. I should probably post what I told some close friends about fears over lacking talent or skill in any appreciable field soon to see how prevalent and helpful it could be.

 And also in the depths of despair on the ramparts of a castle wall came a scary thought that I had not felt since elementary school stemming from the idea that nobody really cares if I'm around or not. How easy it would be to jump off the wall.

 I ran as quickly as I could back to the after party. That is not the mood or thought to entertain when standing on a tall wall.

 I'm doing better this morning but I still don't have anybody to talk to about this, probably out of the same familiarity that made me not sense this mood back at home. I only have you guys until somebody comes to me to talk about this, proving this poisonous idea wrong with their caring.

[freeformschooler]

I got my Google+ invite and was all excited... and then I signed up and it tells me I have to be 18 or older to join up. I facepalmed real hard, and just went through the signup again but said I was 18, and it turns out my entire gmail account is locked out of Google+ just from signing up that first time. Yes thats right if you sign up to use this and put the wrong age accidentally, you're completely locked out of it.

[Gamerlord]

i had a massive identity crisis today

[RedKing]

I don't know how common or not it is, but I understand what you're saying. 

 Thanks bro, this was kinda what I needed. I would normally be posting in the happy thread about the actual event and all the goodness of seeing my brother again, but this is becoming more and more of a frightening feeling. It also sorta cumulated to a frightening climax of despair where I realized a large part of my anxiety is from a fear of being pointless, that nobodies life would be any worse if I was not around. I should probably post what I told some close friends about fears over lacking talent or skill in any appreciable field soon to see how prevalent and helpful it could be.

 And also in the depths of despair on the ramparts of a castle wall came a scary thought that I had not felt since elementary school stemming from the idea that nobody really cares if I'm around or not. How easy it would be to jump off the wall.

 I ran as quickly as I could back to the after party. That is not the mood or thought to entertain when standing on a tall wall.

 I'm doing better this morning but I still don't have anybody to talk to about this, probably out of the same familiarity that made me not sense this mood back at home. I only have you guys until somebody comes to me to talk about this, proving this poisonous idea wrong with their caring.

Honestly, I think that sort of "I could just jump right off / drive off the bridge / step in front of traffic" things are extremely common. My wife and I have both had those sort of sudden impulses before, and it's not even connected to being depressed or anything. Like, I can be having a perfectly normal day and on the drive home there's the tiny little part of me that just WANTS to turn the steering wheel hard and go right off the bridge. For no real reason. That's not the scary part anymore. The scary part is when it actually takes some concentration and willpower to tamp that part of the psyche down.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

And also in the depths of despair on the ramparts of a castle wall came a scary thought that I had not felt since elementary school stemming from the idea that nobody really cares if I'm around or not. How easy it would be to jump off the wall.

 I ran as quickly as I could back to the after party. That is not the mood or thought to entertain when standing on a tall wall.

 I'm doing better this morning but I still don't have anybody to talk to about this, probably out of the same familiarity that made me not sense this mood back at home. I only have you guys until somebody comes to me to talk about this, proving this poisonous idea wrong with their caring.

Honestly, I think that sort of "I could just jump right off / drive off the bridge / step in front of traffic" things are extremely common. My wife and I have both had those sort of sudden impulses before, and it's not even connected to being depressed or anything. Like, I can be having a perfectly normal day and on the drive home there's the tiny little part of me that just WANTS to turn the steering wheel hard and go right off the bridge. For no real reason. That's not the scary part anymore. The scary part is when it actually takes some concentration and willpower to tamp that part of the psyche down.

It sounds like Todestrieb is getting to you, but that sounds normal enough. I've also had those sudden and completely unsupported suicide urges standing on high surfaces, looking out windows, holding knives, ect. They don't mean anything if they just show up out of the blue, so don't worry about it. Scared the hell out of me the first time, but now they're just sort of depressing whenever they happen.

[Bauglir]

Yeah, for me I think they stem from a, "Hey, I totally have the power to do something completely unexpected." Or something like that. Usually it's when driving, less so with high places (I am actually terrified of high places that don't have significant railing or other means for keeping me from falling over).

[MetalSlimeHunt]

I am actually terrified of high places that don't have significant railing or other means for keeping me from falling over.

Freud would say that you aren't afraid of falling. He would say that you're afraid of deciding to jump. Scary thought, that.

[Lord Shonus]

The last known geographical locations of 15 missing nuclear weapons.

Even looking at that makes me feel anxious.

The good news is that the larger portion don't have their fissile cores.

And quite a ot of them are "known" to have been salvaged.

[Bauglir]

I am actually terrified of high places that don't have significant railing or other means for keeping me from falling over.

Freud would say that you aren't afraid of falling. He would say that you're afraid of deciding to jump. Scary thought, that.

Well, I'd dispute that, since quite often all it takes is a flimsy waist-high railing to calm me down. Nothing I couldn't easily get over if I put in even the slightest amount of effort; what freaks me out is the possibility that I could trip and die/be seriously injured, or at least that's what I keep picturing in my head and worrying about.

[ToonyMan]

I can't believe I missed your post Duke from two days ago, argh.

I don't know how common or not it is, but I understand what you're saying. 

Thanks bro, this was kinda what I needed. I would normally be posting in the happy thread about the actual event and all the goodness of seeing my brother again, but this is becoming more and more of a frightening feeling. It also sorta cumulated to a frightening climax of despair where I realized a large part of my anxiety is from a fear of being pointless, that nobodies life would be any worse if I was not around. I should probably post what I told some close friends about fears over lacking talent or skill in any appreciable field soon to see how prevalent and helpful it could be.

I want to hug you Duke, so so much.  I don't think you're pointless at all.  I think you're a wonderful person who is trying to understand his feelings for the better.

[freeformschooler]

I can't speak for Duke's personal friends but I know that we all don't realize the impact we make on other people's lives. On bay 12 at least he's is an invaluable member with a strong head.

[Taco Dan]

Stream was a failure, nobody came. I'll try again next week.

[freeformschooler]

But I waited and waited for you to start it back up.

[Darvi]

And I even came back after I was finished D:

[ein]

The Dollfie Dream Base Body II (White Skin) is not currently available. Please contact us for availability of this item.

D:
I guess white skin is more popular than normal after all.