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[Aslandus]

A were-ass child 'visited' my fort. A few dead animals, dwarf-children and emergency militia members later, it transformed back into a human child, who promptly gets chased all over the map by my surviving militia.... who seem to actually have some grasp of tactics today, and chased it into a 7/7 pond... whacking it over the head with their copper crossbows and bruising the flesh... and 1 z-level below, I see this:

An unconscious, over-exerted, DROWNING, human child were-ass
I can only imagine the scene.

A peaceful, tropical mangrove swamp wilderness next to the ocean, a slowly growing settlement abruptly disrupted by a werecreature visit...

And after said were creature transforms into something less troublesome, it gets chased into a deep pond, where the vengeful militia survivors are furiously drubbing it on the head with their metal crossbows whenever it tries to come up for air. Wow.

Dwarven witch trials are hardcore

[the1337doofus]

A were-ass child 'visited' my fort. A few dead animals, dwarf-children and emergency militia members later, it transformed back into a human child, who promptly gets chased all over the map by my surviving militia.... who seem to actually have some grasp of tactics today, and chased it into a 7/7 pond... whacking it over the head with their copper crossbows and bruising the flesh... and 1 z-level below, I see this:

An unconscious, over-exerted, DROWNING, human child were-ass
I can only imagine the scene.

A peaceful, tropical mangrove swamp wilderness next to the ocean, a slowly growing settlement abruptly disrupted by a werecreature visit...

And after said were creature transforms into something less troublesome, it gets chased into a deep pond, where the vengeful militia survivors are furiously drubbing it on the head with their metal crossbows whenever it tries to come up for air. Wow.

It's like dwarven whack-a-mole!

[Kuikka]

I dont even want to understand this anymore. This tantruming is totally out of control and makes my forts unplayable.

First colony. About 160 humans, one is killed by a goblin and shit hit the fan. Abandoned the place after 70 was killed.

Reclaiming. About 110 citizens. Crossbowman tries to fight a raccoon and manages to drown herself, the raccoon and her baby. SHIT. HITS. THE. FAN. Again a massacre going on.

Should I go back to 034-version or what. I remember that back then my idiots at least managed to endure few dead persons.

[Staalo]

This year's human caravan inexplicably caught fire while leaving the fortress. I have no idea why. They're all melting right now on the doorstep.

The flaming Yak Bulls ignited the dry grass outside and now another wildfire is spreading towards my outdoors workers.

Searingmines was really an apt name for this fortress, considering how many fire-related incidents there have been...


EDIT: I think I got it: the wagon-pullers must have glitched through the wall into a magma channel when ascending the exit ramp. That explains why all their heads are on fire and melting.

Next time I must take care not to place magma within two squares of a wagon ramp.

[Psyra]

Cowering inside my fort because of the third elven siege.

The first two times, my traps claim all but a few, but when I send out my thirty or so military (2 squads militia, 1 archers) to flatten the three or so elves left, they charge out... and then just cluster around the elves but won't attack or defend themselves, getting cut to ribbons in the process, then the others panic at the sight of death and run.

They've been up in my palisades training and sparring for two years and can shred forgotten beasts in seconds, but now a lowly bow-elf and two mace-elves (the rest are caught in cage traps) can single-handedly prance through my military and crush them one at a time because my entire militia just stand there and gawk. Had no trouble attacking their caravans much earlier. it doesn't seem to be a morale issue, 60%+ of the population including the military are 'ecstatic', they're armed and armored, they just seem to not to know how to defend... :/

Just letting them slaughter my livestock, as my previously protected livestock fields couldn't be sealed because some idiot dropped his pick in the doorway when the siege alarm was sounded.

[Trupik]

Nothing much... I just dug a tunnel through some cyan colored microcline at around magma levels... Only after the tunnel is done, I realized that it was NOT a microcline at all. Some more precision digging around, and now I strongly believe that I missed The Fun by inches. 

[meskion]

second year of fort, on the first visit the liasion told us they wanted toys badly next year, it seems they have mistaken my expedition leader for Santa Claus, must be the beard. Anyway, for this autumn i got prepared tons and tons of toys to buy the whole caravan, but while the merchants were crossing a bridge by the river, two of them managed to slip somehow, without any intervention, and fall into the water.. and it happens that the river had quite a high waterfall. Instant death for both merchants. what do the rest of them do? run in fear of the river without passing through my depot. And now the liasion says they dont want toys for next year anymore.. yey!

[miauw62]

An FB that I thought was safely confined to the second cavern layer found it's way up to the first and massacred my entire fort while it was in something of a tantrum spiral because I mass murdered all the children. The only surviving dwarves are a few dwarves that got webbed on top of cage traps, two wounded dorfs in the hospital and a wereskink speardwarf in a bridged-off isolation cell (I was going to throw her down my execution tower once it was finished, but alas)

The wereskink is sitting in her isolation cell on the corpse of the child she bore and killed. She has a happy thought: "talked to a companion recently".

[Staalo]

Those humans of The North Confederacy really like their cheese. Recent self-immolated caravan was carrying a huge loads of it and what didn't melt is now lying there on the floor, getting very mature indeed.  Haulers seem reluctant to touch the stuff;  I can almost smell the whole fortress through the screen now.

In other news, one of the Legendary +5 armorers got a mood ("The Strange Influence", an adamantine high boot) and is now... a Legendary +5 armorer. Why, DF, why?

[Chevaleresse]

Hmm. The peafowl are ignoring the nest boxes; I wonder why?

[Tacomagic]

Hmm. The peafowl are ignoring the nest boxes; I wonder why?

Do you have multiple nesting sites?  Currently fowl of all kinds do not respect boundaries set by pastures when claiming nests, so they'll happily claim nests that they can't actually get to.  They can even claim nest boxes behind forbidden doors.

The only way it seems that you can force which nest they claim is to restrict them to a single tile room with a pasture over a nest box.  And even then, sometimes they'll claim a random box somewhere else.

[Chevaleresse]

They're just pastured in a room with the nest boxes. I know orientation doesn't affect egg laying, just fertilization, so i have no idea why they refuse to use them.

In tangentially related news, my stonecrafter has like eight thoughts about being separated from his wife, the fortress planter.


EDIT: Apparently they're just getting the eggs out with ninjalike speed.

[utunnels]

A snow titan just arrived. First a coral titan, now a snow one, I wonder what's next.

[SOLDIER First]

Nothing much... I just dug a tunnel through some cyan colored microcline at around magma levels... Only after the tunnel is done, I realized that it was NOT a microcline at all. Some more precision digging around, and now I strongly believe that I missed The Fun by inches. 

Save, breach it, see how fun things get, savescum.

[Eric Blank]

An FB that I thought was safely confined to the second cavern layer found it's way up to the first and massacred my entire fort while it was in something of a tantrum spiral because I mass murdered all the children. The only surviving dwarves are a few dwarves that got webbed on top of cage traps, two wounded dorfs in the hospital and a wereskink speardwarf in a bridged-off isolation cell (I was going to throw her down my execution tower once it was finished, but alas)

The wereskink is sitting in her isolation cell on the corpse of the child she bore and killed. She has a happy thought: "talked to a companion recently".

Suppose you'll have to postpone tiruin's execution until she can free a couple caged dwarves, eh?

In an amusing karmic twist for your intention to kill her in your game, in dutchlings xcom game, as I heard yesterday before I quit the irc, she panicked and blew you up. Good job hating each other.

I started a new fort yesterday and have run into zero problems whatsoever. The dorfs are all happy and industrious. No flooding, no FB invasions, no expedition leaders resurrecting the dead... it's a nice forest.