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[Demonic Spoon]

We already checked, the cultists didn't have a book.

[lemon10]

No you fools, if you mix the smoked salmon with everything else you will ruin it. And which idiot came up with the idea of mixing everything together? How do you not know that eating nails usually kills humans.
Don't mix the smoked salmon, proceed to eat it on its own. Don't eat the nails.

[Jellycat12]

Nooo, pour the milk on the salmon, then eat it.

[misko27]

What about the internet? Last time I was free they had that, and it seemed good at finding stuff.

[Thecard]

No you fools, if you mix the smoked salmon with everything else you will ruin it. And which idiot came up with the idea of mixing everything together? How do you not know that eating nails usually kills humans.
Don't mix the smoked salmon, proceed to eat it on its own. Don't eat the nails.

This, but let's eat the nails too.  The ranch goes on the chicken, let's eat that too.

[Jellycat12]

No you fools, if you mix the smoked salmon with everything else you will ruin it. And which idiot came up with the idea of mixing everything together? How do you not know that eating nails usually kills humans.
Don't mix the smoked salmon, proceed to eat it on its own. Don't eat the nails.

This, but let's eat the nails too.  The ranch goes on the chicken, let's eat that too.

No. I'd rather not be without a host again.

[Teneb]

Fine. Mix everything except the nails and eat the result.

[Cassandra]

"Noooo! Eat the chicken and the salmon, SACRIFICE THE REST FOR POWER!"

[SomeStupidGuy]

We blend the chicken, then mix that with booze and milk, then we drink that with a lovely meal of smoked salmon.

[GreatWyrmGold]

I leave in hope of getting stuff done and come back to discover that you have set off a hug plague and are planning to either summon some competition or kill our host. Let's store the food for now. Then, find a piece of furniture we don't like and test combat uses of our powers.

[Thecard]

I leave in hope of getting stuff done and come back to discover that you have set off a hug plague and are planning to either summon some competition or kill our host. Let's store the food for now. Then, find a piece of furniture we don't like and test combat uses of our powers.

You... you left?  How?
And I still think we should find someone society doesn't like to test our powers on.  Let's go find some hobos.

[Demonic Spoon]

I leave in hope of getting stuff done and come back to discover that you have set off a hug plague. Then, find a piece of furniture we don't like[/b] and test combat uses of our powers.

Our non-plague powers. Also hug plagues are the best plagues.

[Fniff]

Fuck it. You're tired of them screaming in your ear to do stuff. You head into the apartment building and up the stairs, ignoring the police tape in your neighbor's apartment, and head inside your apartment. Putting the groceries into the fridge and pantry, you set up the cereal, pour some milk into a bowl and then start eating the cereal. When you are done, you follow the more reasonable orders. Such as going on the internet. You retire to your room with a cup of hot chocolate and search up on the internet "Weird cult arcane spells or something I dunno". You find a geocities "OCCLUT" site that consists of horrible fonts, spinning pentagrams and all caps.

You find a spell that seems to be legit.

Spoiler: Spells (click to show/hide)

Red Death
CANNOT USE FOR NINE TURNS
History: This spell was made by the worshippers of the Green Eyed Man, a multiversal god of chaos. While the Green Eyed Man prefers to use his own disease (The Undying Plague), when he is not around the worshippers use the Red Death, a combination of every disease into one megavirus.
Use: Using this spell will cause the target to become infected with a horrific disease. They will degenerate into shambling horrors dedicated to sharing their plague. However, using this in combat will result you unable to use the next turn.
Recharge Time: 10 turns.
To The Pain
CAN USE
History: Invented as a prank in 1834, this spell has been used by many and is fairly common. It considered useful but not as flashy as the others.
Use: Using this spell will cause everyone in the vicinity to be overcome by a terrible, phantom pain. They will recover in a turn, but it gives plenty of time to sneak in an attack or flee.
Recharge Time: 4 turns.

[SomeStupidGuy]

Booze time!

[GreatWyrmGold]

No.
Check the local news to see if the plague made it there yet. I figure zombies oughta make the news pretty fast...