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193 (52.7%)

Total Members Voted: 364

[GoombaGeek]

That reminded me of an old one: Literally less than five minutes after embark, a goddamn alligator out of nowhere tore off my miner's left hand, right lower arm and left cheek. He was still "quite content" afterwards, but kept failing to pick up his equipment due to not having any hands left... I think it said something about "minor injuries" (!) in his Thoughts section.

A crundle bit my macedorf sergeant's ear off. She then proceeded to bite off the crundle's head. Anyone else curious as to what the hell a crundle looks like? And for reference/hits and giggles, she goes maces akimbo.

The horns are chewy

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Sorry for the thread-hijack
Just drew up some crundles for my forum game and had to portray this 

edit: damn it was a SHE
oh well, they both have beards, right?

How about this?

This:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I get the image that she kicked him in the face after wall-running up his body, using her grip on the weapons as an axle of sorts. XD

[RabblerouserGT]

Just found a "coyote left eye tooth" in my workshop floor upon reclaiming my volcano fort.
... wat?

Coyote had teeth in his eyes. HIS EYES HAD TEETH!
I can only imagine some sort of unimaginably horrifying Eldritch Abomination that this tooth belonged to.

Contents: two blood spatter

[Malecus]

I hate to burst your bubble, but I'm bursting your bubble on eldritch dogbominations.

[Sus]

That reminded me of an old one: Literally less than five minutes after embark, a goddamn alligator out of nowhere tore off my miner's left hand, right lower arm and left cheek. He was still "quite content" afterwards, but kept failing to pick up his equipment due to not having any hands left... I think it said something about "minor injuries" (!) in his Thoughts section.

He kind of looks like Darkman, doesn't he? Coolness.

[GoombaGeek]

Just found a "coyote left eye tooth" in my workshop floor upon reclaiming my volcano fort.
... wat?

Coyote had teeth in his eyes. HIS EYES HAD TEETH!
I can only imagine some sort of unimaginably horrifying Eldritch Abomination that this tooth belonged to.

Contents: two blood spatter

See, I knew this one, and teeth laying on the ground aren't funny enough to draw.

[Quietust]

Just found a "coyote left eye tooth" in my workshop floor upon reclaiming my volcano fort.
... wat?

Coyote had teeth in his eyes. HIS EYES HAD TEETH!

I've lost count of how many people were so lazy that they couldn't even do a Google search for "eye tooth" and instead posted either in the forums or on the bug tracker thinking that something was wrong with the game. Seriously, people...

[Mimodo]

Ok, I'm too lazy to read through them all, but I'd assume that "grabbed the goblin's left lower back tooth with his upper right arm" has already been done... If not, well, can you try to draw it

One that I think would look pretty cool... My legendary miner was working around the top of a magma pipe, when a magma crab decided to take a shot with his molten rock. The miner, being the legendary dwarven ninja miner he is, dodged the flying molten rock..... That's all I saw in the reports, and he no longer lives, and there is no body to be found... Although around that same time I discovered a magma sea, so I'm assuming that he took a trip to the bottom, and somehow lived long enough to make it to the bottom...

I kinda see it like "ha, dodged it" as he's diving straight into a lava pit

[GoombaGeek]

Ok, I'm too lazy to read through them all, but I'd assume that "grabbed the goblin's left lower back tooth with his upper right arm" has already been done... If not, well, can you try to draw it

One that I think would look pretty cool... My legendary miner was working around the top of a magma pipe, when a magma crab decided to take a shot with his molten rock. The miner, being the legendary dwarven ninja miner he is, dodged the flying molten rock..... That's all I saw in the reports, and he no longer lives, and there is no body to be found... Although around that same time I discovered a magma sea, so I'm assuming that he took a trip to the bottom, and somehow lived long enough to make it to the bottom...

I kinda see it like "ha, dodged it" as he's diving straight into a lava pit

When I get home.

I think he's still living in the lava, his soul held together by sheer will and watching over the magma sea for the sake of dwarfkind.

[Boozebeard]

Just found a "coyote left eye tooth" in my workshop floor upon reclaiming my volcano fort.
... wat?

Coyote had teeth in his eyes. HIS EYES HAD TEETH!
I can only imagine some sort of unimaginably horrifying Eldritch Abomination that this tooth belonged to.

Contents: two blood spatter

An eye tooth is another term for the canine teeth of your upper jaw. (Mainly because it is located directly under your eyes.)

[ZzarkLinux]

Can we get a drawing of the "Waterfall Jumping" bug feature that was fixed ?

Urist has been comforted by a lovely waterfall recently.
Urist has sustained severe injuries recently.
Urist has seen a lovely mist recently.
Urist, Waterfall Adventurer, has been found dead. Died of bliss

[Kastrol Aslaasri]

Not mine, but this one is a classic.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[PlutoniumApe]

Not mine, but this one is a classic.

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[Eric Blank]

Another one I have happened during the same siege. A goblin master lasher goes on my weapon trap, gets one of his legs chopped off, dodges off, goes back on, gets his other leg chopped off, dodges off, with no legs now, he goes on it AGAIN, and gets his lower body chopped off. He somehow manages to dodge off as half a man, and, in one last effor to get through the trap, the crawls into it as half a man. And dies.

Bisection is instant death. They don't even get another turn. It's possible though that all of this happened at once, before the trap was finished cutting and he registered as dead.

[GoombaGeek]

Not mine, but this one is a classic.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

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Dammit!

[zuglar]

Urist McIdiot is painfully carrying (not guiding) up 50 z-levels of stairs a wheelbarrow with a chunk of hematite inside.

Job description:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Worker: Vucar Konosbal, Hunter
Location: Stone Stockpile #19
Items:
*maple wheelbarrow <#19>* 

Wheelbarrow's description:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Weight: 542Γ
Basic Value: 200☼
Contents:
hematite