Tuesday: 0910 hours. Get more equipment, make a robotic power suit!
Stuck in the south west corner with Bruce Halford and his mech suit of burning death, you’re struck by a bolt of inspiration! You gather all the equipment you can find, and construct a robotic power suit! But it’s faulty [1], and when you suit up it blows your left arm off! Whoops!
Damage Sustained: [1]+[1]=2hp!
"Ouch! Oh jeez, what the f***!" Danny cries, not taking kindly to the large tooth lodged in his head. Deciding a change of tactics is in order, he shall fend the vile Tracy off with his cheesegrater whilst using the other hand to activate his magical tattoo once more, this time using the power of his mind to summon a pterodactyl, and to summon it beneath him as a trusty steed! Then he stall take flight above the bloody expanse of the battlefield office!
"Get back here you alien bastard!" Tracy jumped at Danny's head, aerosol flame thrower blazing away at his face.
DEATH COMBAT: CONTINUED!Initiative: Danny [5] vs Tracy [3]. Danny wins!
Danny tries to fend off Tracy with his cheese grater to give him enough time to summon a pterodactyl as a trusty steed: he barely keeps her back! He manages to summon a medium sized pterodactyl just as
Tracy whips out her aerosol flame thrower and blazes it at his face! It explodes! Danny is singed and his pterodactyl lightly damaged, but Tracy’s face is blown off! Danny swoops off into the sky above the bloody expanse of the battleoffice!
Damage Inflicted: Danny: 2hp!
Damage Inflicted: Pterodactyl steed: 3hp!
Damage Inflicted: Tracy: 8hp!
Wound Sustained! Tracy: No face!
Item Lost! Flamethrower!
DEATH COMBAT: BROKEN OFF: DANNY HAS FLED!In a moment of rage Powder Woodcutter remembers that you can throw without limbs and throws EVERYTHING in his inventory at the man and prepares for torso splatterage.
Continue breaking apart Powder Woodcutter’s atoms and teleport away while doing that.
remove Woodcutter’s head from behind with the handaxe
MULTIDEATH COMBAT: ENTERED!Initiative: Powder Woodcutter [5], Alex Klag [4], Ryan Lovechild [6]. Lovechild strikes first!
Ryan Lovechild, HR drone, manages to circle round the insane Powder Woodcutter, Gardener Extraordinaire, and aims a vicious strike from behind at his neck! Woodcutter’s head is severed [4]!
Damaged Inflicted: [2]+[1]+[1] = 4hp!
Powder Woodcutter is not quite struck down! He uses his last remaining strength to take his hacksaw and chainsaw handle out of his inventory and hurl them with his teeth at the security elf dissolving his atoms in front of him. He hits him [6] directly in the face! The chainsaw handle slices off the stunned
Alex Klag’s right ear before boomeranging round to slice off the left!
Damage Inflicted: 9hp!
The hacksaw flies into Klag’s throat! It is sliced apart!
Damage Inflicted: 11hp!
Klag is struck down! With his last breath he sees Powder Woodcutter bleeding heavily to death before him!
CONTESTANT ANNIHILATED! ALEX KLAG IS DECEASED! KILL BY A MAN WITH NO LIMBS! Achievement Unlocked! Powder Woodcutter: First Contestant Slayer!
... ... ... ... ... ...
”No! Only I shall have the burning suit of mechno-death! Be gone! Rhawwrr!”
Bruce Halford, seeing
Daniel attempt to construct a robotic power suit to rival his own, decides to put a stop to this foul heresy! He swoops down at him, blazing away with his remaining arm-mounted flamethrower: he hits Daniel full in the face with a blast of disfiguring death!
Damage Inflicted: 14hp!
Wound Inflicted: Hair and eyebrows burnt off!
“Rawwwrrrrrrrrrrr! Tasty pterodactyl! Rawwwwrrrrrrrr!!”
The raging burning herd of velociterminatoraptorsauruses stumbles about in the middle of the office, and they suddenly notice a
tasty looking pterodactyl appear in the sky above them. They strike! With an inhuman display of acrobatics they leap into the air! They miss completely! They all land on their faces!
Damage Sustained: 9hp!
… … … … … …
Items: Science equipment, Cold thrower, faulty robotic power suit.
Hit points: 7
Wounds: Frozen left foot, no left arm, no hair, no eyebrows, bad facial burns!
Morale: -5
Failure Rating: 17.
Abilities: Adventure Mode Travel! ,
InventLocation: SW Corner
Items: Hit points: 1
Wounds: No legs, no arms, severed head!
Morale: -10
Failure Rating: 47.
Abilities: No-Legged Dwarven Murderer Rage! ,
Pray to the Lever God! ,
BERSERKCUTTER'S SLASH!Location: Centre
Achievement Unlocked! First Contestant Slayer!
Items: Half a bagel, one oversized & oversharpened cheese grater, electric pencil sharpener, bunch of masterwork hefty paperweights, pterodactyl steed.
Hit points: 18
Wounds: None
Morale: -5
Failure Rating: 20.
Abilities: Mighty Power!, Robot-Dinosaur summoning.
Location: In the air above the centre!
Items:Hit points: 14
Wounds: No face, only one ear!
Morale: -13
Failure Rating: 42.
Abilities: Head Smasher!, Mental Ability:
Crazy Bitch!Location: NW Corner
Achievement Unlocked! First kill!
Achievement Unlocked! Dinoslayer!
Items: GenCorp Science Portal Gun, Armour-plated crotch, faulty GenCorp Stealth generator, teleporter, arm-mounted machine gun (possibly infinite ammo)
Hit points: -4
Wounds: Left arm sliced off! Not the machine gun one though don't worry!
Morale: -8
Failure Rating: 5.
Abilities: Death Glare! ,
BREAKAGE OF TEH PHYSICS!,
BRIGHT PINKLocation: Centre
Items: The Xerox of Doom! , a dozen ready-printed newsletters, a handaxe.
Hit points: 12
Wounds: No eyebrows, no left ankle!
Morale: 8
Failure Rating: 4.
Abilities: Schadenfreude!,
CHILDHOOD PAIN! Location: Centre
Items: Mech-suit, flamethrowers x 2, Eyes of Doom
Hit points: 89 (including mech-suit)
Wounds: Left arm chewed off!
Morale: 0
Failure Rating: -100.
Abilities: Daughter Summoning! Death Grip! CEO and Overlord! Submission Drone Commander!
Location: Directly above you! And in the SW corner!
Items: Sharp teeth, sharp claws
Hit points: 10
Wounds: Extremely burnt!
Morale: 0
Failure Rating: -100.
Abilities: Biting You to Bits, Tearing You to Shreds, Some Kind of Strange Metallic-y Regeneration Shape Changing Thing I Don't Know it's Been Ages Since I Saw That But Don't You Basically Have to Melt Them in a Furnace? Any Ideas?
Location: Centre
Author
Topic: Roll to Work at GenCorp! Tuesday: The End: A New CEO. (Read 64954 times)