See, I, again, see this from a strange outsider's perspective with the whole guys afraid of girls thing.
First, because I'm out to some of my girlfriends and they have friends who are boys, eventually some of the boys find out. Inevitably, some of those boys are nervous wrecks around women, I can relate, as I've gotten shy around men. Also, because I'm not out to everyone and can pass rather well as just a straight guy when I have to and also be one of the girls when I get the all-too-rare and coveted chance, I can kinda go between both sides.
There seem to generally be five types of guys as they deal with females, a.) the comfy, b.) the uncomfy, c.) sexists, d.) gay, and e.) "huh?" There are exceptions, mixtures, etc, but these are broad categories.
"The comfy" couldn't care less and just more or less are used to being around girls. Their focus is on things other than gender, which they don't really notice too often unless it comes up. Its more about "what are we doing tonight," and/or the activity the group is doing. This is the target we are, and straight guys themselves should be, aiming for. These are the guys who are usually fun/safe to hang around, and can be quite cute sometimes. Most girls I know want to date this type of guy, or at least will eventually once they get over the notion of the "dangerous guy" as attractive.
"The uncomfy," is his own worst enemy and reason why he rarely gets a date. He tends to fluctuate between two extremes: caring too much about what she'll think, and caring too little. In the first extreme, he's terrified and goes through paralysis by analysis. He is so terrified about screwing up that this becomes a self fulfilling prophesy, because he's focused on that and not on things that matter. The other extreme is when he finally just decides he's going to "go for it" and throws caution to the wind, which promptly blows him away. He said to himself at some point, "I can't worry about all of this stuff because it's holding me back," so he didn't. He then classically puts foot in mouth.
Sexists knowingly or not, through words or actions don't treat girls the same as boys and this sucks.
Gays, our troubles with women are of a decidedly different nature, as there is no sexual tension. We might be scared the girl could, intentionally or unintentionally, out us, before we are ready for this. Other than that we will typically happily be friends, it shall be fabulous.
Though it is worth noting that I've actually seen some gays be sexist towards women, though I have no god damn idea why, at all.
The
"huh?" are, as their name implies, quite clueless and oblivious to just about everything. "Huh?s" are not always male and indeed can be just about any type of person. They aren't paying attention and are pretty much just sorta there. Depending upon how cynical you are, these may make up any portion of the population. They may make an offensive remark, but be rather clueless about it. Some "huh?s" can be educated and informed; others seem to refuse to be.
As applied to comic book shops, this actually is the employer's/owner's fault. It is his or her business and he or she is in control of his or her own employees. The owner is stupid if they do not train their employees to cater to female customers. We're talking about a lot of money lost here in addition to the simple "you're cutting out people for no reason, jerk" considerations. I mean is this so hard? Let me get this straight, you hired a bunch of early twenties/teenage guys to serve customers/sell and they don't know how to deal with 50% of the population.... Reduced...sales...forecast.... And that's just in money, which nearly every store owner in the world understands.
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Topic: Chill and Relaxed Progressive Irritation and Annoyance Thread (Read 876435 times)