Aren't they kind of ostracizing the newcomer themselves in that way, though?
I mean, I understand. I can't stand having other people around me when I'm browsing in bookshops, using a computer, doing pretty much anything. That's why I say that in a situation like a convention, i.e. something social, socializing with men and totally ignoring women
unless they are dressed like hookers is frankly disturbing.
Er... let me put it like this, just in terms of how I feel:
Dudes socializing and getting nervous when a woman enters the room -> It'd make me feel kind of nervous and bad and like I don't belong--but hell, I wasn't there to interact with those people, anyway.
Dudes working a counter, chatting with each other, and totally ignoring a woman who is trying to buy things from them -> Yeah, no, I don't think so.
Dudes at a convention socializing only within their friend group (happens to be all dudes) and no one else -> I don't care. Like, I REALLY don't care at all.
Dudes at a convention who will only open socialization situations with men, period, and appear vaguely anxious -> I'd feel a bit insulted, but I'd do my best to start conversations myself and come off as non-threatening as possible.
Dudes at a convention who will only socialize with men on an equal footing, but take up-skirt photos of women, or only give attention to women dressed as hookers -> major problem.
I hope that clears things up.
Sure, they'll eventuall get over it, but that takes time.
That's basically all I care about. It's the situation where no one give a crap about shunning women and making them feel totally unwelcome that bothers me. Obviously, if there's a getting-over-it program in place at all, that's not the situation in question.