use dwarven powers of direction to find stone and activate it
You look around the tunnel, and see just one passageway, in the direction the spirit pointed you. You begin to walk. (5) You make it a ways down the tunnel, and see an archway. Inscribed above the archway is the phrase "The temple of the Stone of Balance". That's probably where you want to go. You walk into the archway, (3) and see a pair of ninjas. They turn around and attack. (2) The first one is too surprised to do anything, (5) but the second one springs at you. (dodge:4) He hits you on the (BP:5) right arm with his dagger, (damage:6) and cuts you deeply. It hurts a lot...
ARM? NOOOOOOO! OTHER ARM! NOOOOOOOOOO. FRED! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO. BATTLE SCHEMA ERRRY BODY DIES 'ROUND 'ERE IS AGOGOGO I.E SHOOT AND STAB AND BURN AND STAB EVERYTHING
Battle Schema: Battlemage Diplomacy! You prepare to beat that priest into the ground. You shoot a fireball with your wounded lower arm! (4) (dodge:2) It hit the priest right on the (BP:5) left arm! (damage:6) His arm explodes! Wow! And his shirt is on fire! (1) The fire goes out. He's wielding his longsword one-handed now... You come up and swipe at him with Sam and Sword! (5+1, 1+1) (dodge:3, 6) He dodges Sword remarkably well, but moves right into the path of Sam! (BP:1) You hit him on the head! (damage:2+3) And kill him with your badass axe-gun. FATALITY! You look at the fancy circle in the center. It looks like the stone is almost out of power! You better activate it quick!
IGNORE THE REPETITIVE LICH. ACTIVATE THE STONE. LEAVE THIS PLANE LIKE IT WAS NO THING.
You prepare to make a break for the stone. (4+1 vs 1) The lich is much too slow to catch you, and you press your hand to the imprint! The stone begins to glow... "
Hello, child of my seas. I am Oooloaathsssiiiaooo, the spirit of the Water Plane. You have been wise in activating my Stone. I will aid you in your quest to save my brother and sister planes. First, I shall deal with this Abomination of nature..." A shell of ice forms around the lich. "
And now, I will send you to aid one of your friends, in the Abyss. He needs your aid, for he has fallen behind on his quest." A whirlpool appears, through which you can see that whiny little Tiefling. You are sucked in, and appear in an office of some sort with a gush of water. There's a little imp there as well, who says "Oh, and that was my favorite carpet, too. And who let this Orc in?"
Time to bluff. Ax coughed and buffed his nails on his shirt. "Strictly speaking I don't think you can do all the same things SHE can," he said pointedly. True since he couldn't give him a guild license, but Ahzz didn't need to know that. "Don't make me trot out 'your treasure or your life,' it's just cliched and boring. Even if it is completely applicable here. So, which is it gonna be? A ring that you don't need and a pair of lungs that still work, or you hand the ring over and get to live another day?" Ax cracked his knuckles menacingly. "Keep in mind that I've already kicked your ass once and I got past all of your traps. Nice parts, by the way; I'm sure some of them will be useful."
Suddenly, that idiot Orc appears, drenching you and the carpet with salt water. The little imp complains as well, and then you turn up the intimidation. "Give. Me. The. Ring." (6+1+1+1) He quails under your gaze and that of the intimidating Orc. "OK, OK, OK, I'll give it to you! And other stuff! Just don't hurt me! Please!" He unlocks a safe, handing you first the Kraken Seduction ring, and then two more. "Invisibility! Here! And this one, it shoots fireballs! Now go! Just go! Don't hurt meeeee!!!" That's disgusting. He wet himself.You didn't even know demons could do that.
Bad things always seem to happen after I teleport into volcanoes.
Kill the bard!!! Kill it already!!! Then go intangible.
You charge up at the lich, and, as you prepare to smite it, have the urge to sing. (4) "
Uh, what's up, I'm known as DJ: Divine Justice I'm known, 'bout to bring the hammer down on this sack of bones. I got my crew, got my faith, and it's time for war, we gon' roll on this bitch for my boy Pelor. Yo I heard all of your rhymes, the shit makes me puke, yo' minions I juked, evil 'bout to get rebuked! Please remain seated while I bust my rhymes, I heard all ya lines, musta heard 'em bout a thousand times, but that's fine, long as you're ready to go up in smoke, your lair ain't nothin' but a footnote on a joke, get ready to choke, son, burn up in holy fire and yo ashes I'll toke, one, two, three, mic check, you there? It's cool, kid, not much shame in runnin' scared, cuz I'm the brains of the brawn, get set to get gone, my crew be comin' on strong. We rollin, set up shop, and straight up ball, haters always tryna make me fall, but we always make sure they end up crawl-in' away, you mothafucka's ain't got shit to say. We out." With that powerful rap, you swing Meddler-Smiter in a long arc at the lich. (1+1+1) (dodge:2) It hit him, in his (BP:5) sword arm, (damage:2+1) scratching it but not really doing much damage. The lich readies his arms to cast a spell, and then (6+1) he is struck by your undead-turning powers. He collapses to the floor, (5+1) and you stab your sword through his back, destroying his phylactery in the process. Another soul freed. You hear a hiss in the air, and a voice from beyond the grave, "
I'm coming back for you, 'cause I'm not through, DJ Phylactery and his crew, we gonna get you and your little dog too!" It fades away as he passes through to the other side of Death. Um. Wait. He lives there. At least it'll delay him until he gets another body. You quickly go intangible as the platform falls into the lava, ad float in the air. Better jump to the Plane of Death soon.
POWER CHORD
Unless I can talk it into leaving us alone as we're all lawful.
...
Nah.
EDIT:
I think you mean +1 to "climbing, jumping etc.", don't you? Or is it -1 to incoming damage?
((Incoming Damage.))
You get up on the top deck of Emet. "Hello, Mechanus! Are you ready to ROCK?" You begin to strum your guitar, and let loose a devastating sonic blast. (1) At Emet. Iali tries to move it out of the way, (dodge:2-1) but you're standing on the deck, and the blast bypasses the forcefield. (damage:3) The blast just knocked a skylight in the Paladin's room. Cool. You throw the cannon remote to the twins, and tell them to open fire, as you make your way to the flame turret. (1+1, 2+1, 6+1, 6+1) (dodge: 3, 5, 4, 3) Two of the shots go wide, but two head straight for the dragon, and hit the (BP:3, 2) right wing and left arm. (damage:5+1, 6+1) The wing looks damaged quite a bit, and the dragon is floundering a little. The arm got blown right off. And then it's fixed. There are little machines crawling on it and constantly repairing it. This might be a tough battle. You finally get to the flame turret, and shoot. (1) Shoot the deck, that is. (damage:4) The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire. We really need some water don't let that motherfucker burn. (6) You quickly put out the flames. Just in time for the dragon to shoot some of its own. (1) At itself. (damage:5) Apparently, on some especially flammable part of itself. Its right arm is burning.
Statuses:
Species: Mutant
Description: A "Being" That stands like a man, the size of a man, but covered with horrible burns and an alchemists robe
Profession: Alchemist/Mad Scientest
Background: He once was a man. Atleast he thinks so. But what he does remember is his knack for mixing up chemicals and herbs, always trying to find that perfect mix. But he has suffered his fair share of accidents in the lab
Home Plane: Astral Plane
Abilities:
Master Alchemist,
Mad Alchemist,
Astral Denizen,
Well-Read,
flightMutations:
Alchemical Immunities,
Four Arms,
Inventory:
Bottle Sling,
Good Chemistry Set,
Leather Robes,
Phial of enchanted gas,
Doctor's Bag, Plague Doctor Mask, Iron Dagger, 5 gp,
SAM, Infinity doses of
Wizard's Wallbanger, Mild Hallucinogen (10 doses),
SwordSpells:
Spined Hands,
Firebolt,
Thriller,
Name: Axolisin Sathael. He prefers being called Ax or Sin since he thinks it's awesome.
Species: Tiefling
Description: Short, pale, and skinny. He stands about 5'5 and 120 pounds. His hair and eyes are pure black and his pure white skin has light gray spots across it. His horns are goat-like. He spends a lot of time moping and figures since he's just so mistreated he can do whatever he wants.
Profession: Thief
Background: He's been kicked around his entire life as you might expect and resorted to thievery since Tieflings are branded as thieves and untrustworthy anyway. He's very small time and hasn't progressed much beyond mugging, purse stealing, pickpocketing, and robbing the poor.
Home Plane: Plane of Shadow
Inventory:
Steel Daggers,
Throwing Daggers,
Good Lockpicks,
Magic Ring,
Black Leather Armor,
Deadly Poison,
Self-propelled throwing discs, Ring of Kraken Seduction, Ring of Invisibility, Ring of Fireball, 60 gp
Abilities:
Burglar,
Good Eyes,
Denizen of Shadow,
Fancy Horns,
Trap MasterHealth: Fine
Species: Golem
Description: Created as a result of DRUNK THAUMATOLOGY!. Was intended to have humanlike personality and intellgence. Doesn't talk much, but isn't stupid. Has no goals of his own besides survival, goes around helping people with various things for lack of a better purpose. Will do anything asked of him unless he has a reason not to (if it conflicts with an existing goal or his basic morality). Lawful Good (as in lawful as the opposite of chaotic). Extremely logical and unemotional. Dislikes entropic behavior. Is good with machines (clockwork and a bit of early steam power, I guess).
When he does talk, it sounds something like the above paragraph.
Profession: None. See above. Requires no food and builds his own shelter, and has very little interest in material goods.
Background: See description.
Home Plane: Material Plane.
Inventory:
Lifeban,
Toolkit, 15 gp,
Magitek Manuals, Foot Jets (5 continuous turns/20 hops),
Sonar Cannon Guitar., Cool Shades
Abilities:
Pneumatic Joints,
Simple Personality,
Material Plane Denizen,
Oh Captain My Captain,
Armor PlatingHealth: Fine
This character brought to you thanks to the wonderful racial descriptions.
Species: Aasimar
Description: Lawful Neutral, almost Lawful Stupid. He firmly believes in the tenets of his faith, and is willing to die to uphold them. Was split into Nirur and Torir, god and evil respectively. A god of good put them back together, and they now are essentially one person with two minds.
Profession: Paladin.
Background: His people believe themselves to be the only true guardians of the material plane; the best way to help the mortal inhabitants of said plane is by not touching anything. Obviously this is what The Creator had in mind, and any who meddle in the plane, and therefore blaspheme The Creator, are to be punished severely.
After three decades of military service (doing nothing), he has been sent out as a sort of test to determine the extent of the planer distortion, fix it if possible, find the perpetrators, deliver justice, then report back.
Home Plane: Ethereal Plane.
Abilities:
Nirur:
Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking,
Righteous Fury,
Torir:
Puppy Kicker,
Evil BastardBoth:
Ethereal Denizen,
Split PersonalityInventory:
Variably Holy Longsword,
Variably Holy Symbol Full Plate Armor,
Enchanted Ring, 50 gp Scary Dagger
Name: Jo'Ldza (Big Jo)
Species: Orc
Description: We'sn orcs may be deesa jerks, but we's still hassda jobs. I'mn A big ork. Got'sa bald head, with red eyes and wella build a'ms. I'sa been a kaptain for more dan' twenn'y yea's. I 'elp keep the balance wit' mah krew.
Profession: Kaptain of an orc sailing ship
Background: Grew up on a sailing boat with his brother, who was also a kaptain. inherited kaptain'ism and crew from his brother when he died.
Home Plane: Water Plane
Abilities:
Sailor,
Swashbuckler Water Plane Denizen,
Dinghy Pilot, One-armed Man
Inventory:
Good Half-Rapier, Shirt, Pants,
Magic Coin NecklaceSpecies: dwarf
Name: Azrael
Description: a short sturdy creature fond of drink and industry
Profession: blacksmith
Bio: got tired of digging and wants adventure
Home: earth plane
Abilities:
Dwarven Smith,
Drink and Industry,
Earth Plane DenizenInventory:
-Copper Pickaxe-, Leather clothes, Blacksmith's tools, Mining helmet
Allies:
You kind of made his house into your flying machine, so he decided to tag along. He is now going all fangirl over Schilcote, who he sees as almost a demigod of mechanics.
Abilities:
Master Mechanic,
Old ManInventory: The entire contents of his house, which you made into a flying machine.
You saved them from some pirates. Yay!
Abilities:
Powder Monkeys,
Kids,
Air Plane NativesInventory:Clothes
A mindless cannon robot the size of a man. Has a shoulder-mounted badass cannon.
Abilities: Never runs out of gunpowder.
Inventory:
11 corrosive gas shells, 23 normal cannonballs
Vehicles:
The house part belongs to the gnome mechanic, the flying mechanism belongs to Schilcote, the fueling system was made by Riccto. It runs on air and can easily break the sound barrier. It will almost never break. Schilcote can planejump the ship, but will have -1 on all actions in the next turn.
First floor: Workshop, door outside, kitchen
Second Floor: Nirur's room (one cannon - left), Spare bedroom (one cannon - right), Engine room
Third floor: Spare bedroom, cockpit (two cannons - forward), Iali Boltcut's room, ladder to roof, Grav Cannon
Roof:
Pouting TieflingAx's "room",
Badass FlameTurret, Two swivelling cannons, Big Light
Special:
Shield Projector,
Air Generator,
Energy Generator,
Unbreakable drill, Mapquest Generator,
Bought by Schilcote to keep Big Jo happy. Flies as fast as you can row it (with the orc alone? Pretty fast.), enchantment is permanent.
Vortices Found: Stones Activated:
Plane of Death √
Abyss √
Plane of Water √ √
Mechanus √
Celestia √ √
Wizard's Tower √
Generic Asian Dojo √