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[Descan]

We're not talking about the land-mass, Tir-tir. The countries.

For example: Fucking Siberia.

[smjjames]

Spoiler: dat Eastern Hemisphere map (click to show/hide)

Clearly this is some alternate universe newspaper where whatever happened in some fella's EU4 game became historical fact

Looking at the world map, I'd actually hazard a guess that that's what the lazy image-googler used.

That, or a historical map.

I believe that's what you call a conformal map.

Basically 2 kinds o' maps
Depicting the accurate sizes of objects on the map, or depicting accurate shapes of these objects. The challenge is that you cannot have both ['correct' maps we commonly see nowadays are hybrids, both conformal and equivalent [equidistant] maps]. The more accurately you depict shape, the less accurate will be your depiction of size, and vice versa.

Dat Australia. So big.

PS: Historical map == most likely conformal.

North and South America look like they're divided by native american regional groups, not historical countries. Apart from the Aztec area and the Mayan territories, and a lazily drawn Inca Empire.

We're not talking about the land-mass, Tir-tir. The countries.

For example: Fucking Siberia.

And example all of Africa. I don't see the Mali or Songhai empire in there.

Edit: Actially, I think they might be, but those states in there are all 19th century onwards.

[Tiruin]

oops 
Huh, now that you point it o-
Oh wow Lithuania.

North and South America look like they're divided by native american regional groups, not historical countries. Apart from the Aztec area and the Mayan territories, and a lazily drawn Inca Empire.

But...there is no America in the pic.

[SealyStar]

Somehow if we use the schwa symbol as a letter our language will evolve, our problems will be solved, and we will free our minds from The Maaan's bondage

At least that's what I got. Does anyone else have a better idea of what this weird hippie's message is supposed to be?

EDIT: Oh lawdji, dat alternate universe map. Evidently our middle-school geography curricula are slipping pretty far...

[Dutchling]

what happen

[smjjames]

Somehow if we use the schwa symbol as a letter our language will evolve, our problems will be solved, and we will free our minds from The Maaan's bondage

At least that's what I got. Does anyone else have a better idea of what this weird hippie's message is supposed to be?

Oh FFS, the youtube captions are off the bottom of the thing, how does that happen?...... Not that youtube captions are worth shit anyway.

[pisskop]

My mother has been teaching her friends 'magic' again.  The exact nature of her teaching is unknown to me, but she knows I don't much believe that it is 'magic' over psychological tricks.  Not that I'm not willing to learn what she believes, but she is rather unwilling to sit down and lay it out.

meh.

[Descan]

My mum is watching "God's Not Dead."

whatthefuckingfuckfuckamIwatching?

[Dutchling]

Don't worry. Just because he's not dead doesn't mean he doesn't want you dead.

[Loud Whispers]

My mum is watching "God's Not Dead."

whatthefuckingfuckfuckamIwatching?

Relevant:

So I had time to waste and decided to start watching "God is not dead," on the basis that I remembered seeing a poster for it; each one seemed absolutely designed to build a platonic urge within me to slap Nietzsche all over the place like so:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: Immanual Kant: Critique of pure disappointment (click to show/hide)

At first I had hopes for the movie, there were some immediate flaws what with the main character being so naive and pure that if I ever met such a person in real life I would do everything in my power to corrupt them, (which probably wouldn't bode well for the stereotype of being evil infidels but Satan wills it) and the philosophical arguments being no better than the old youtube comment flame crusades of old, but the supporting cast were great (with exception to a few bizarre cameos of people who I thought were poor stereotypes until I realized they were real Americans). When I mean the supporting cast is great I mean it, the side characters include two fundies (one Christian missionary from Africa and one Muslim immigrant to America, the latter who pressures his daughter into wearing the burka and the film actually goes out of its way to explain why he does it in a way that is actually rather respectful), the aforementioned daughter herself who is succumbing to the wonders of Western degeneracy (I exaggerate, she secretly enjoys Western liberal ideals such as not wearing the Burka when her father is not around), some sort of business lady who is ok, a whole bunch of other minor characters who have the ethnic diversity of a textbook cover and the professor starts out all right. I was won over from being completely critical of the film to actually start enjoying it, the professor is a hardline fedoracore atheist who abuses his educational authority to further his agenda (in all my experience with American teachers is this standard? Because it seems standard) but even then it seems like a respectful figure and just like all the other characters the movie goes out of its way to try and explain why he holds his views just as the others hold their views.
At about 40 minutes in he goes full Disney evil. From there everything goes rather downhill as the main character's love interest (who up until this point had opposed him out of care suddenly develops a bad case of mean spiritedness and dumps him brutally for little reason) and everything gets two dimensional and what had looked like a film that had intense amounts of care wrapped into everything that wasn't about God threw it all away rapidly in the name of the Hollywood format. FFS one bloke actually says love is useless to his fiancee who has just told him he has cancer. You can pull something like that off sure, but you have to actually give a shit movie. You can't just throw out these heavy handed things with the subtlety of an Orca making love to coconut crab, you actually have to respect the intellectual integrity of your audience and actually allow for situations that aren't opaque or blindingly bright.

The only consolation I can see is that it has a good start and during the middle there's an unintentionally hilarious scene where the main character is talking to a man called Martin from godless China about Jesus and all that and Martin just has this constant look of dude let me read my fucking book on his face.

The biggest flaw in this all is that the main character has to persuade the students that God is alive. He argues that because the professor got them on his side then it should be hard for him.

EXCEPT THAT THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THEISTS, ATHEISTS AND AGNOSTICS ARE. THEY ARE IGNORANT AS FUCK AND NOT GOOD JUDGES.

God damn it movie, I had hope. I guess I'll just stick with my reckless infidel ways. This movie could learn a lot from the Book of Eli about how to do a religious film right; it says something about your film when a movie that has Kung-Fu action black Jesus fighting chainsaw fat man in a tunnel is more subtle, less preachy and respectful to its audience's brains with its message than your film about a college debate. Seriously though, go watch the Book of Eli. It's a much better film. And its soundtrack is sexy.

The greatest sin of "God is not dead" is wasted potential.

[Graknorke]

My mum is watching "God's Not Dead."

whatthefuckingfuckfuckamIwatching?

Have watched it m'self.
Strawman professor is the worst strawman I've seen.

And then an eagle called "small government" perched on the flag pole and everyone said the pledge of allegiance three times.

[Furtuka]

No Portugal, the GDR exists, Austria's gotten fat...

Where's that from?

Some university newspaper from Oklahoma.

Here's the full map, apparently the newspaper staff found it on Google Image Search and thought it was the real map of the world.

Spoiler: The Americas are just as bad as Eurasia (click to show/hide)

Why are Honduras and Nicaragua melded together? What is that Costa Rica/Panama/Colombia monstrosity? Why did Guatemala conquer Mexico and Belize?

http://universalminibuilders.wikia.com/wiki/File:EOEP_World_Map_2_Black_And_White.png
found it

[Graknorke]

They stole from a fucking ROBLOX FANSITE?
My sides are experiencing relativistic effects right now, oh wow.

[Loud Whispers]

Honestly though, I have sat through films which were nothing short of hateful. Films that spewed racist vitriol at me, clung onto every marxist tenet with sycophantic disgust, extolled trashy nothings into my ears with wanton abandon and even films that were just boring. But I have managed to sit through many of them, even with just academic interest at the very least, as even bad films are interesting in why they are bad. I have even sat through bad films just to prove with masochistic relish that I could watch this trash and still emerge with a head full of unpulled hair.

Not this film. It's just awkwardly bad, painfully so. I could not finish watching this one. I kept thinking the movie was viewing the last delirious dreams of a dying man who did not realize he had been hit by a car prior to the movie, so a merciful deity gave him this last picture to give his life meaning before his soul was devoured by the Lord of Change. And I felt like I was another man who prior to viewing the movie had been hit by a car and was stuck in Limbo, watching this film as the almighty judges decided whether my heart weighed heavier than my crimes and whether I would be sent to hell where every single day someone would try to sell me every single religion I'm not a part of for all eternity whilst the collegiate professor keeps trying to go full Dawkins on every lesson and I just want to do some fucking education but I can't because there is not God but that is not dead which can eternal lie, And with strange aeons even death may - the critics, the viscous, sensitive, audacious commenters that feast on the religious and the irreligious... Why shouldn’t I watch this film as a Loud Whispers whispers such forbidden things? ... The war ate my Grisha5, damn them all... And the Yanks ate Pathos with flames and burnt these fucking mosquitoes and the secret... No, no, I tell you, I am not that daemon swineherd in the twilit grotto! It was not that pure protagonist of a’ flat face on that self-righteous, Mary-Sue thing! Who says I am a madman? He says God lives, but my God died!... Shall an Eli hold the lands of a Nietzsche?... It’s sacrilege, I tell you... That tenured professor... Curse you, Wheaton, I’ll teach you to faint at what my kind do!... ’Sblood, thou stinkard, I’ll learn ye how to flame... Wolde ye swynke me thilke wys?... Ipsum Ipsum Lorem Ipsum Ipsum!... Atys... Dia ad aghaidh ’s ad aodann... agus bas dunach ort! Dhonas ’s dholas ort, agus leat-sa!... Ungl... ungl... rrrlh... chchch.....

[penguinofhonor]

Uh... LW is probably okay.