Dear UrstNobleOfSteel,
your impressive work as Mayor, Broker, manager, bookkeeper and commander of the emergancy civialan militia, lead me to the apointing of you as Baron,
However, once in this position you fell slack in your previous duties, leading me to have to replace you in them with 5 differnt dwarves all lacking your previously well honed expertise. Leaving you the sole role of Baron and emergancy civlian militia commander.
Even with yuir relaxed schedual you continued to complain.
Most anyone else would have been proud to hae a 3 story mountain top villa, made from stone hauled from the deepest depths. The Villa overlooked all the great land I had given over to your watching.
Now I know you like steel, I like steel too and our steal works is operating strong.
So when you asked for steel furnishings I provided.
But when you asked for a steel bed, I had to say no. The metal smiths won't do it. They Just Won't.
Now, when it came to your office, where visiting nobles would meet, I had to insist.
For you i created the most valuable piece of furniture every created, by a dwarf in his right mind, in the fortress.
It's value rivaled, and indeed exceeded that of most artifacts this fortress has ever produced, A plantinium throne, encrusted with the weath of a mountain: gems and diamonds of all varieties, studs of gold, silver and the bone of our enemies.
This throne was the awe of all who saw it.
Now you got mad, when you saw it was not of steel, this throne wich took 3 legendairy dwarves 3 years to make. Had you just gone down two sets of stairs to the dinign room you could have sat in your steel one there. Heck at the time you destoyed it, there was already a dwarf carting a steel one up to you following your bellowed demands for "A steel throne in my office".
Now you see, it wasn't your destroying this masterpiece, that offended the people of the fortress,
No. It was the way you complained about not having a decent office.
Is it any wonder they refused to follow you when you when down to fight that cave ogre?
Signed
The Mountain Watcher
Attention Urst McCivilianMilitiaMan;
You work in the past has been exemplery, both in Military, and in your normal civilan jobs,
Now when you are called to the walls, for a drawbridge opening, I want you to stand on the walls and rain your usual rain of copper bolts down upon the goblin hordes tailing the merchant wagons. So the merchants can get over the bridge, without letting the golbins though.
The standard protocol upon the merchants entering hte fortress was the usaull closign of the bridge, This was fallowed despite, your strange desire to go across it to get a better vantage point, for shootign of said goblins.
I'm sure you realised, before your untiml demise that the golblin skimishers who i snet you to guard gainst are quite able in melee, and you, a civilan crossbom and are not,
and even with a full quiver, ou can only shoot one of them at a time.
You lost one of our valuable Quivers,
there are another 30 militia men, with crossbows, waiting for for a quiver, and you left one outside.
Now i need to send civlians into unknow teritory to reclaim our corpse and quiver.
Signed
the Watching Ox