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[sprinkled chariot]

Lone, sad, ill, ran out of money, and have to use not more then 3 dollars worth of products per day, too frustrated to continue coding or doing anything useful. Just empty waste of time.

[Sergarr]

Lone, sad, ill, ran out of money, and have to use not more then 3 dollars worth of products per day, too frustrated to continue coding or doing anything useful. Just empty waste of time.

Sounds like me from about half a year ago. It got better for me (though I'm still failing to do anything useful ahaha D: ), hopefully it will get better for you.

[Rolan7]

I was recently thinking I should go visit my gma, or at least call her...
Today I found out her sister, my great-aunt, is being taken off her feeding tube.

...  And now I am very drunk.
I guess, the question is, will I have the courage tomorrow to visit her basically-dead YET NOT DEAD corpse.
I would let her just die in peace, like I would want but fact is my gma is very much alive and I know she'd love to have me home... even for a day.  So I probably will.

Or else regret it forever
No rest for the wicked, particularly when we're ashamed of our wickedness.

The family always wrote her off as slow, but she was exceptionally kind.  She played checkers whenever we kids visited, and told us stories.  I'll always remember her that way.

The funeral itself is less of a concern, but hopefully I'll find the strength to attend that too.  Even if it means two trips (better than staying a full week).  My dress clothes aren't ideal, but she won't mind...  My presence is what will matter, for me and for the family.
Not for her, she'll be dead...

Funeral's day after tomorrow.
Which happens to be game-day for my friends, but I think we can work it out.
We hadn't been close in a long time.  And that maybe makes it more important that I go to this.

...Point where I ought to stop, but I'm drunk even by my standards...
Dad, me, and my brother are supposed to be pallbearers.
My brother won't be there unless I cash in favors *hard*.
And it might be better if he isn't there.  At least from my perspective.

Why is it on me to keep the family together?
Because I care, and I'm soft.  But... I do care.

[TheBiggerFish]

Lone, sad, ill, ran out of money, and have to use not more then 3 dollars worth of products per day, too frustrated to continue coding or doing anything useful. Just empty waste of time.

...Can we like, send you money or something?

[Robot Parade Leader]

Screamed at again at work. I just want to do my job.

I don't really have a choice and am just doing what I'm told. I think my manager hates my guts, because I keep meeting or exceeding all expectations, but he still yells at me. He won't tell me what's wrong. Neither will anybody else except for the usual bitching about things sucking that I can't change. If I could, I would, because that'd make my life easier. I work too hard, because i think people might like me if I do or at least leave me alone. Nope. Everybody says this stuff needs done, but nobody wants to do it or wants me to do it. WTF?

[ChairmanPoo]

As a non-alcoholic (I don't even like alcoholic cakes) I have a certain amount of pseudo-scientific curiosity in what my tolerance is like. Not enough, of course, to actually try and see, but it is there.

You probably mean teetotaller rather than non-alcoholic.

[JoshuaFH]

As a non-alcoholic (I don't even like alcoholic cakes) I have a certain amount of pseudo-scientific curiosity in what my tolerance is like. Not enough, of course, to actually try and see, but it is there.

You probably mean teetotaller rather than non-alcoholic.

Yeah, that is what I identify as as well. Alcoholic beverages of any kind is extremely unpalatable, in addition to what I believe to being innately corrupting and self-destructive, though I guess that is just from growing up in a family of violent drunks where every holiday is a drunken party and every gathering devolved into a fight...

I bought some beer battered fish fillets by accident, and I know they're not alcoholic but just the taste of them is extremely off-putting.

I asked the girl that works at my workplace's cafeteria out again, she said yes, and I was happy for a while but I re-awakened that feeling that something is shaking and trembling inside me, in dire anticipation of danger, and it provokes a lot of anxiety and over-thinking over nothing. She'll probably just be disinterested again anyway, so I'm just wasting my own time and stressing myself out over nothing.

I don't know if I'll continue going to play Magic The Gathering at the Local Game Store. I feel I offended one of the nice employees there by complaining, I feel I humiliated myself by making bad plays that I should honestly know better after playing for so many years now, and I'm honestly kind of confused as to how I should even approach the game anymore, since I started only going to Thursday Night Commander league... but I'm not sure if it is supposed to be friendly or competitive, there's a strong meta where people cooperate to get the league points, but then it so often feels like people aren't playing to win, but if you do play to win you're kinda a killjoy, but then you can get knocked out, and I just don't know what to do anymore; the whole experience just leads me to believe this is another place I don't belong.

I stopped going to the Friday Night events altogether, because I just feel discouraged since that is a competitive format and I never make any headway cause of the P2W nature of the game. Maybe I'll just use those Thursdays and Fridays to go the the gym and double up on exercise, since my progress in getting fit has been very slow, if not at a total standstill.

I accidentally scheduled my next therapist appointment on valentines day. I suppose it doesn't matter, but I feel slightly conscientious about it. I've been writing her these notes trying to explain my inner thoughts, but I'm not sure if my latest one is overly angsty or stupid or whatever. I'm a bit more eloquent in writing, but I hope they're helping my sessions.

[George_Chickens]

Got four calls and assumed they were from distant friends. Nope. All of them were just overseas scammers.

I'm sad now.

[Reelya]

"Hello, is that you? Yeah, it's me. I'm stuck and need you to wire me some money ..."

[CABL]

Today is probably one of the worst days in my life. Here's what happened:


- I got sick from cold fruit cocktail which I ordered yesterday: My nasal cavities are full of mucus (I REALLY hate when my nose is full of mucus and I'm unable to breathe normally).

- Some extremely intelligent individual decided to light up the candles in his room, triggering hotel's fire detection. I was really scared and even bid farewell to my notebook, saying that "he served me well", but it all was just a false alarm.

- I was in the traffic jam today twice.

- I wasn't able to visit Moscow Zoo because it was closed (I didn't even know that it's closing at 4:00 PM, Google didn't say that!).


The only good thing today is that I completed my inheritance BS.

[George_Chickens]

How did the fruit cocktail make you sick, though? Are you allergic?

[Sergarr]

How did the fruit cocktail make you sick, though? Are you allergic?

It probably had something to do with the freezing -20 Celsius temperatures combined with a wind that felt even colder.

[CABL]

How did the fruit cocktail make you sick, though? Are you allergic?

It probably had something to do with the freezing -20 Celsius temperatures combined with a wind that felt even colder.

Because the cocktail itself was cold too, and no, I'm not allergic at all.

And now if you excuse me, I will go and eat some Japanese food and pretend this day never happened.

[TheBiggerFish]

*hugs*


I would have more to say, but I've got a headache, and I'm tired, and I'm just kind of overwhelmed.

*sigh*

[ChairmanPoo]

How did the fruit cocktail make you sick, though? Are you allergic?

It probably had something to do with the freezing -20 Celsius temperatures combined with a wind that felt even colder.

Because the cocktail itself was cold too, and no, I'm not allergic at all.

And now if you excuse me, I will go and eat some Japanese food and pretend this day never happened.

But cold cocktails don't make you sick. Viruses do.