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[GlyphGryph]

Was hit with a pretty intense case of depression at approximately 12:40 today. Suddenly I disliked people, life was pointless, I couldn't enjoy what is basically one of my favorite activities in the world, and that soon progressed to wanting to just give up and take a nap or work out of work and goes who knows where, or just break down crying.

Been running diversion since then instead of working, but I'm holding it off for the moment. It's bad, though, I can still feel it pushing at the back of my mind. Just need to... keep myself occupied. Like a shark, if I stop I'll die. Or get really depressed, I guess. Emotionally die.

Bluh! Stupid... sudden onset depression. Get the fuck off.

[Scelly9]

It appears Signavatar is dead....

[Heliman]

blessing or curse? blessing or curse? hmmm.

On one hand people loose a cool feature with their avatars.

On the OTHER hand, if they don't have randomly swapping avatars, I can tell them apart more easily...

[GlyphGryph]

Blessing. Gods do I hate avatar swapping.

[Loud Whispers]

How unfortunate. We'll all have to get penguin avatars instead. Or manual swap.

I'll do it. You bet I'll do it.

[Pnx]

Been running diversion since then instead of working, but I'm holding it off for the moment. It's bad, though, I can still feel it pushing at the back of my mind. Just need to... keep myself occupied. Like a shark, if I stop I'll die. Or get really depressed, I guess. Emotionally die.

This is how I've spent most of the last... five years? More? I'm not really sure time has just blurred together. I keep being told I need to deal with my issues and get over them, but I honestly don't know how.

[Karlito]

It appears Signavatar is dead....

So, that's why you all look like broken images.

[GlyphGryph]

I've learned "dealing with my issues" just makes them worse. Like how "anger therapy" and beating up pillows actually makes angry more frequent and more dangerous.

The three months I spent in therapy were basically the worst three months of my life - every time I looked to be getting better, the middle of the week would come around and I'd be reminded about why it was so important to stay miserable. It essentially required me to stop, and once I stopped the depression caught me, and it didn't like letting go.

I mean, it would do so occasionally anyways, and I'm sure the psychs prescribing a fucking antidepressant that gave me the wonderful joy of being both super-depressed and hypomanic AT THE SAME TIME.

God-damn nightmare.

* GlyphGryph shivers.

[Urist Imiknorris]

It appears Signavatar is dead....

Not for me~ ^_^

[GlyphGryph]

Not for anyone. It undied.

Oh god.

It's a zombie.

Everyone who uses it should switch to zombie avatars now.

[Pnx]

I've learned "dealing with my issues" just makes them worse. Like how "anger therapy" and beating up pillows actually makes angry more frequent and more dangerous.

The three months I spent in therapy were basically the worst three months of my life - every time I looked to be getting better, the middle of the week would come around and I'd be reminded about why it was so important to stay miserable. It essentially required me to stop, and once I stopped the depression caught me, and it didn't like letting go.

I mean, it would do so occasionally anyways, and I'm sure the psychs prescribing a fucking antidepressant that gave me the wonderful joy of being both super-depressed and hypomanic AT THE SAME TIME.

God-damn nightmare.

* GlyphGryph shivers.

Yeah, this also sounds very familiar. Every week I go to my therapist feeling anxious because I know she's going to dredge up issues I don't want to deal with, then I walk out feeling depressed because she inevitably did.

I also know how you feel about the anger management thing. Growing up I used to break things a lot, it was very rare for me to direct my anger towards people unless they were really provoking me. My mother was naturally unhappy that I kept breaking things, so she took me to anger management therapy.

Trying to deal with my anger through anger releasing exercises and such was absolutely useless, it did help however when I started dealing with the sources of my frustration, stress, and anguish that were causing my anger. My therapist started to catch onto the fact that my mother was herself a very big cause of this, so she tried to talk to my mother about behaving in a more constructive way. My mother stopped taking me to that therapist because I'd been "spreading lies about her".

[GlyphGryph]

The anger thing wasn't personal. There's actually been study after study about how certain styles of anger management therapy literally make things worse. Like, without exception.

It doesn't stop them from being practiced or advocated, of course.

But seriously, I've been so much happier since I stopped seeing my therapist and used the money to join a sport and take up music lessons. It is not a decision I regret in the least.

Switching to Lithium certainly didn't hurt either, hah. I'm not "well", but I'm so much better it's not even funny.

[quinnr]

In order to run for class president (or Vice, Treasurer, Secretary) at my school, you must get 50 people in your grade to sign a petition for you. It's not too difficult if you aren't highly hated, and I was up to ~39 signatures. I left it on a desk (clipped to a clipboard with another paper) during anime club while I was doing things at the computer for club, and when I go back at the end of the meeting the paper is gone, and the other paper that was on the clipboard is sitting loose there.

I hold pretty much every person except for one there in pretty high esteem, and sure enough, when I speak to my friend who was sitting there she says that this one person had my petition. The alleged thief denies it all and says that she might've seen the paper outside of the classroom but isn't sure.

Pretty sure that she has a grudge because I turned down her request to date me (and then my helpful friend decided to tell her that we were dating for the last six months, which I told her was false because unhelpful friend is just making problems). Or something along those lines. Still, I am furious. It is a pain enough to get 50 signatures from people at school, and to have to do it a second time is bleh.

[MaximumZero]

-RAAAAAGH-

Have you tried Martial Arts? That's what got (and kept) me out of trouble with my anger issues. Honestly, I think it's a place to channel it, learn to control it, and compete with it. The more you compete with yourself, the more focused you have to be, and the easier it is to sublimate the anger and substitute it with focus and drive instead.

[JoshuaFH]

I'm having a bad case of Intrusive Thoughts, and all day I've just been thinking of the most fucking disgusting things fucking possible and I can't stop. No matter how hard I try. It's gotten to the point where I just want to beat myself till I'm unconscious or braindead, cause this shit can't keep going on.