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[Rowanas]

Heat lovers are lizards. Everyone knows it. We've got a heatwave here in Britain, and it's unbearable! It doesn't drop below 17 degrees C until the wee hours of the morning, and during the day it has reached 30-odd. I crave the return of winter and my cool 12 degree max. How can I languish beneath the gaze of my new fan, untirely unclad and yet still be unreasonably warm? How am I to divest myself of my skin in order to feel the cool breeze upon my veins?

[Starver]

Fans just move air around. Unless you induce a wind-chill factor, the best they do is disturb the laminar layer of body-warmed air.

As to removing the skin: try Brillo Pads™? Or try to find the right part of a cheese-grater, according to your skin-type. (Save the nutmeg bit for your nuts!)

[Greiger]

It topped out at 30 degrees C here today and it was the most pleasant feeling day in at least a month. (ignoring the fact that it rained or stormed literally all day)  It's midnight now and it's still 22C.  Could always be worse.

[Caz]

There is a beautiful rainstorm outside. I saw a little spider with a huge clutch of eggs grab the nest and hide it under a 'blanket' made out of webs.

Also, the rainstorm came on about 5 minutes after I put out some washing. Naturally.

[Max™]

Fans just move air around. Unless you induce a wind-chill factor, the best they do is disturb the laminar layer of body-warmed air.

As to removing the skin: try Brillo Pads™? Or try to find the right part of a cheese-grater, according to your skin-type. (Save the nutmeg bit for your nuts!)

http://contrib2.wkfinetools.com/FidgenT/2HandedRasps/2HandedRasps-02.asp