I've been having a lot of FUN with my new fort on my laptop. First trouble was a wereass showing up and murdering about five dorfs before being put down the husband of one of the dead was bitten, and is now himself a wereass. I've locked him in his own private gallery to fill with beautiful artwork, and he made an artifact, completing his life's dream; hauntednegated the cassiterite trumpet. From there onndorfs have been dying in unfortunate circumstances, including giant bats and a giant cave spider that assaulted the soldiers going to rescue the victim of the giant bat, which killed an extra ~5 dorfs.
Then there was a goblin siege. The only dorf left outside was a baby whose mother was killed by the gcs, now named Patches; when the goblin squad got to her, they just followed her around as she tried to flee. Eventually I mustered a couple squads and while half the goblin force was playing with the cage traps and the other was holding the kid hostage (following her around), I opened a point in the walls and released them. The fight was brief and brutal, and was a complete route with only one escaping goblin. The only friendly fatality? The babies' father, a ranger, who flew into a rage and bulrushes the goblin squad immediately outside. The kid and several soldiers suffered injuries at that point; I guess when the dwarves were released the goblins tried to execute the hostage.
Patches can't stand on her own anymore, but she survived to reach childhood. She is now hopping around on her crutches spamming cancellations because she's "shaken." Poor kid.
Anyway, after that came the cyclops attack. Two fatalities; one civilian and one soldier. Then the minecart accident while testing my trap hall of doom; one ranger killed by suffocation after being crushed under a solid gold minecart, multiple times. So at least it works...