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[pisskop]

Granted, Now Roman rule has returned, complete with all its splendor.  Yea, Roman life is pretty sweet as long as you are a noble or a successful merchant/soldier.  Ohh, only the rich can afford to go to school, so no worries; most of us don't count.

I wish I had my contract extended instead of jsut a semi-tearful goodbye.  Even when firing 'granting somebody a severence referece letter without a rehire' somebody there's got to be tears, bah.

edit:

Spoiler: HA! (click to show/hide)

I got a new contract, just now!

[Audioworm333]

Granted. It's extended by one millisecond.

I wish for this wish to be corrupted.

[MrCelt]

Granted, sadly your computer was told to think of a way to corrupt it without ruining the wish, and exploded.

I wish that I could control time.

[Audioworm333]

Granted. You can't do anything involving the future as it doesn't exist yet, and changing an atom of the past causes a paradox.

I wish my computer had the graphics card to run Grand Theft Auto IV without lag.

[jaxy15]

Granted. It can't run anything else, though.

I wish I had Dawnguard.

[pisskop]

Granted, you recieve a rusty morningstar named 'Dawnguard' via fedex.  it gives you tetnis.

I wish Dawnguard didn't send 5 vampires at me when I'm freezing to death and level 5 in heavy armour.

[lemon10]

Granted, it sends 5 werewolves at you when you are drowning to death in light armor.

I wish I knew every digit of pi.

[Audioworm333]

Granted. The knowledge turns out to be too much for you to hold. Your brain implodes.

I wish I had enough money to obtain a graphics card that could run GTA IV without lag and it wasn't counterfeit or obtained illegally or anything.

[lemon10]

Granted, you buy the graphics card, but it turns out its incompatible with your computer.

I wish I could fly to the MOON. (Without dying of radiation, objects hitting me while flying, or running out of air)

[pisskop]

Granted.  You run out of fuel halfway there and crash land.

I wish I could never forget things the same as those with photographic memory.

[Jellycat12]

Granted. You never forget anything. Not even traumatic events.

I .rof hsiw

[adasdad]

.detnarg

I mwish that my enemies would be cupcake'd.

[Jellycat12]

Granted. The cupcakes are given to you, and you get cupcake'd.

.a rof hsiw I

[wer6]

you get smited for being a cute bold
 
i wish for.... some cake.

[misko27]

Granted. But your cake is in a different castle!

I wish for a regular butterfinger.