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[Weirdsound]

Of the six applications, four are shoo-ins. The other two need some work. I'll likely start this Wed or Thursday, so people have until then to submit or fix up their sheets. I think I'll run with five, so make em good

Also, I know some people are not good at taking critique, so I'm going to resist the urge to offer unsolicited advice on sheets, but if you think you are one of the two sheets that need work, all you have to do as ask, and I'll help you where needed.

[GiglameshDespair]

Well, I'm imaging my backstory's alright, considering you said so, and I corrected my sheet. So I think I'm good.

[Varee]

I feel like mine is one of the sheet that is not up to par so if you have any suggestion/advice just say so

[Weirdsound]

I feel like mine is one of the sheet that is not up to par so if you have any suggestion/advice just say so

I like your character concept alot, but your grasp of English seems a bit weak. That said, you can't get better without practice. Just go over the sheet again, and pay attention to basic grammar stuff such as tense and punctuation. Honestly if nobody posts any other sheets, and the other applicant with a problem doesn't fix it, I'll likely put you in anyway, and if you do some basic fixes, you have a fair chance of getting in regardless of what happens.

If you need specific help with grammar, I can dig up some links for you, but I don't think I'll have time to go over every little issue with you before I pick.

[Jboy2000000]

Spoiler: Faceless, god of Death. (click to show/hide)

Name: Faceless
Origin: Created

Parents: Alvin

Miracles Per Turn: 2
Interactions Per Turn: 1

Boons:

Appearance: He looks human, but always wears a robe to cast a shadow over his head. He stands at average height, just barely below 6 foot, and has a torso with skin the indents around his ribs and sternum. He has no hair on his head, and no face for that matter, he has skin on the rest of his body, but it comes off on the front of his head, revealing his skull, no eyes, lips, nose, tongue to be spoken of.

Personality: He rarely speaks to anyone, except to tease those who die and have the misfortune of meeting him. When he does talk to other gods or mortals, he is very quizzical, speaks mostly in riddles and metaphors that rarely make sense at first. He may not resent the gods, especially his father, but he sneers at the mention of them, acting to hate the gods. He does this mostly to make those under him, and those who don't, fear him.

Goals/Beliefs: He believes that murderers are divine mortal, and are doing the right thing. His only goal is to collect the dead, make sure warriors find their proper place in the afterlife, and reward those who are truly wicked by making them like him, immortal killers made to kill those whose time has come.

Backstory: He was created by Alvin, god of fire, lightning, war and childhood. Before he was created, the wars he watched over meant little, the people who killed would receive little reward upon their own death, and where was the justice in that? He created Faceless so those who died fighting for his pleasure could be rewarded for pleasing him so well. He purposely made him without a face, most people said they can fearlessly stare death in the face and laugh, a hard task to do if death has no face. Before going to the Isle of Plenty, he rewarded those who were valiant warriors and gave them a rich, tasteful afterlife. But in the time between wars, he grew bored of having no people to praise. Until he noticed that people would murder each other without war to provoke them. He saw this as a zealous act, killing without a higher need, and felt they needed to be reward even more than warriors. He decided he wanted them to be like him, killers who would never die, and even aid those near death to die quicker.

[The Froggy Ninja]

PTW

[Harbingerjm]

Also, I know some people are not good at taking critique, so I'm going to resist the urge to offer unsolicited advice on sheets,

Feedback. Must get. Do want. Yeeessss...

[Jboy2000000]

I put in my sheet after you said that, but Id love one.

[Weirdsound]

Also, I know some people are not good at taking critique, so I'm going to resist the urge to offer unsolicited advice on sheets,

Feedback. Must get. Do want. Yeeessss...

Your sheet is pretty good, but the fact that your character is very similar to Lurker's is a rather large problem. Similar personalities and goals, and they are even both dragons of a sort. Since they are pretty much the same thing, I'm hesitant to let both characters in, and I think Lurker's application is just a bit better than yours.

I put in my sheet after you said that, but Id love one.

The sheet is solid.

[Varee]

I fix up most error i can spot. I think it is good enough now right?

[Weirdsound]

I fixed up most of the errors i can spot I spotted. I think it is good enough now, right?

Fixed that for ya :p

But in all seriousness, it is better. I appreciate that you put the effort in, and I like that you are more or less the only app with a clearly stated and non selfish or evil goal/belief system. You still need alot of work in the grammar department, but I'm not perfect with grammar either, and in the end it is less important and easier to teach than story telling or roleplay. I just needed to see that you were willing to put in the effort to improve.

You are in contention, and have a good chance of getting in. It looks like I'll have a tough choice to make.

[micelus]

Probably won't get in considering how late this is, but might as well try.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Name: Ketemos
Origin: Birthed

Parents: Abbey and Telen

Miracles Per Turn: 1+2=3
Interactions Per Turn: 1

Boons:

Appearance: Ketemos takes on the appearance of a gaunt human hairless except for a tuft of short black hair on his head and of course, his eyebrows. His eyes are a dull brown. He is often seen wearing a light blue cloak and a tan tunic. Ketemos has a seemingly permanent frown.

Personality: Ketemos is often serious, always thinking about the future and how society can be improved for the better. He stresses and complains about mortal problems, always trying to convince his fellow gods to take action. Despite this, he tries to be aloof about the squabbles of the gods but often cannot stop himself from intervening, either to promote his mother's interests or to aid the Bellians. While often serious, Ketemos is extremely kind to most mortals, especially the poor and underprivileged. When making a decision, Ketemos tries to keep an open-mind, being cautious about the potential consequences...unless faced with defaming Abbey or his cult.

Goals/Beliefs: Ketemos, as a top priority, promotes his mother's interests. Telen, of course being isolationist in most matters, has little desires besides the expansion of knowledge and wisdom. In most cases, Ketemos is left guessing at what his mother would want, promoting a certain philosopher here, or criticising the invention of one shipwright there. Thinking that Telen wants to uplift society as her ultimate goal, Ketemos tries to uplift the least knowledgeable of the people first and foremost. Despite his public role, he has a burning desire to extinguish the cult of Abbey, and if possible, kill the god himself. He makes sure not to tell this to anyone however.

Backstory: Ketemos was not the product of a loving relationship between a god and goddess or even a mortal. No, his was an unwilling birth. Tulen had rebuffed all attempts by every god or mortal to bed her. No one, regardless of knowledge or physical prowess, could convince her to give them the honour. Abbey, tired of Tulen's constant rejections, took matters into his own hands. One night, at the start of the new year, Abbey drugged the goddess at the yearly celebrations. She became loose and open to certain suggestions. Abbey offered the goddess to any man who desired the taking. Seeing that none would do so (out of righteous fear of her retribution), he did it himself. When Tulen recovered from the drug, she was furious. However, as none could prove that she was unwilling, she had no way of recourse. Instead she raised their son, Ketemos, to hate the man who was his father. Since then, Ketemos has done all he could to subtly discredit Abbey, as well as promote his mother's cult. He has gone to the Isle of Plenty to do both tasks, raising a society without the rotten worship of his father and with all the greatness of his mother.

[Weirdsound]

It is not to late until I say it is. I'll likely pick players as I'm writing the opening post. I'm thinking of beginning with some RP to get us started and introduce the setting before anything mechanical happens, as it will be Sunday at the earliest when I have time to write some more advanced rules, finish making the map, and write up boons for everybody.

[Digital Hellhound]

I don't think any of our Birthed gods come from happy unions. These kids are gonna have some issues.

[Varee]

Mine is quite happy i think. Well it not like romantic union but not many god have romantic relation. Take those greek god for example...... Brith form head, stone, random wild animal......... Warth revenge and enslave of own child. I think our story are pretty mild compare to those.