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Author Topic: Roll to Canadia: -30° kelvin  (Read 11249 times)

WillowLuman

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #15 on: March 03, 2014, 01:14:03 am »

(Just a question, who here can read French?)
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lawastooshort

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #16 on: March 03, 2014, 03:15:10 am »

Chop the counter with my axe.
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Yoink

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #17 on: March 03, 2014, 08:42:00 am »

((Wait... loonies is currency?! Well, that certainly changes things. :o))
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Booze is Life for Yoink

To deprive him of Drink is to steal divinity from God.
you need to reconsider your life
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Remuthra

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #18 on: March 03, 2014, 10:21:52 am »

(Just a question, who here can read French?)
I can guess the meaning of a bit, from studying Latin and playing Age of Empires.

darkpaladin109

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #19 on: March 03, 2014, 11:28:50 am »

Bring out my bazzoka and go outside.
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NAV

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #20 on: March 03, 2014, 02:59:08 pm »

"Well, I suppose I'll have tah order something while I wait for my contact, eh?"

Order donuts and a bag of Moose Milk, then sit to wait for the Moosefather to arrive.
You order 2 glazed donuts and a bag of moose milk. It costs 5 loonies.
You sit and wait for the Moosefather. What's taking him so long?

"Oh no!"

Get North America tattooed on my head, quick!
You have no ink, and no needle for the tattooing.
You could buy a bottle of maple syrup to use as ink, it would cost 1 loonie.
You could use an icicle as a needle, but that would require going outside.

"La poutine, et faites vite!"

Accoster le serment à la hache.

"Canard! C'est un restaurant!"
"Pour la poutine, je ne veut pas les loonies. La poutine est special, je besoin l'Argent Canadian Tire.
You have nothing to throw at the crazed axe man.

Spoiler: Character Sheet (click to show/hide)

Order a hot chocolate.
You buy a hot chocolate for 1 toonie.
The hot chocolate's cup has a large arrow on the side, pointing to the top. It says "Roll up the rim to win".

I AM A CANADIAN SO IT IS MY OBLIGATION TO JOIN THIS.

Name: Arkhan
Age: 20
Gender: Male
Appearance: Super Canadian eh. (Meaning a toque and mittens.)
Personal information: Lives ten minutes from tim hortons.
Job: Works at a firm.
Favourite NHL team: Vancouver Canucks.

Buy a hot chocolate.

(Which is 2.50... I go to timmies a bit... xP )
NOPE 1 TOONIE.
You buy a hot chocolate for 1 toonie. Splitting the loonie? What an absurd concept.
The hot chocolate's cup has a large arrow on the side, pointing to the top. It says "Roll up the rim to win".

(Please bold your actions)

Look out the window. Are there any distressing things outside, aside from the deathly chill of Canadian weather?
You look out the window. [6] Through the blizzard you can see the frozen bodies of those who didn't make it inside fast enough.

Chop the counter with my axe.
You pull your axe out of the table and go to the counter. You raise your axe and prepare to strike when
[server roll 3]
the server grabs your axe and tries to wrestle it away from you but can't.
[Roll 2 -1(Server grabbing axe)]
You accidentally drop the axe. The server puts it behind the counter with the others.
"Please stop breaking things sir, or I will have to call the mounties."

Bring out my bazzoka and go outside.
You pick up your bazooka. It's the only sure-fire way to bring down a moose after all. Might be a bit overkill for a deer though.
[4]
You push the door open with your shoulder, through the meter tall snow. you can barely fit through the opening.
[3]
You can already feel yourself shivering with the early stages of hypothermia.
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Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.

darkpaladin109

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #21 on: March 03, 2014, 03:38:53 pm »

Back inside then. After I get inside, call up a favor from the Canadian Black Market and order a Assasin to kill the Deer.
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Playergamer

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #22 on: March 03, 2014, 06:49:16 pm »

Do it, quick!
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WillowLuman

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #23 on: March 03, 2014, 07:32:19 pm »

Quote
"Pour la poutine, je ne veut pas les loonies. La poutine est special, je besoin l'Argent Canadian Tire."

"Je refuse de payer avec des coupons ontariens!"
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Sinlessmoon

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #24 on: March 03, 2014, 08:24:17 pm »

Roll up the rim!

"Maybe I'll get a car..."

Remuthra

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #25 on: March 03, 2014, 08:26:20 pm »

Light up a maple cigar.

Harry Baldman

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #26 on: March 04, 2014, 12:39:00 am »

Is there a TV in here someplace? If so, try to watch it.
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lawastooshort

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #27 on: March 04, 2014, 06:20:04 am »

Damn.

Ask if I can have the axe back if I leave. If so, leave, and cut the cold out of the air around me to keep warm.
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Calico

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #28 on: March 04, 2014, 04:38:01 pm »

Drink the hot chocolate and assess its quality.
Then, roll up the rim!
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NAV

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Re: Roll to Canadia
« Reply #29 on: March 04, 2014, 05:52:39 pm »

Back inside then. After I get inside, call up a favor from the Canadian Black Market and order a Assasin to kill the Deer.
You go back inside and warm up.
You call the Canadian black market, and ask for an assassin.
[6]
"Gustav the Destroyer is on his way."

Do it, quick!
You buy a bottle of maple syrup for 1 loonie.
[3+1] (From now on, everyone gets a +1 bonus to resisting cold if they are properly dressed. I will assume everyone is properly dressed.)
You brave the cold and go outside to get icicles. Burr.
[1]
You somehow get your tongue stuck to one.
 
Quote
"Pour la poutine, je ne veut pas les loonies. La poutine est special, je besoin l'Argent Canadian Tire."

"Je refuse de payer avec des coupons ontariens!"
"L'Argent Canadian tire est accepter dans tous la pays. Si vous ne veut pas payez, Alors je n'ais pas de poutine pour vous."

Roll up the rim!

"Maybe I'll get a car..."
Breaking Canadian tradition, you roll up the rim before you drink the hot chocolate.
[4]
You win a brand new snowblower!

Light up a maple cigar.
You light up a maple leaf cigar. Despite looking a bit like cannabis leaves, they don't have much of an effect.

Is there a TV in here someplace? If so, try to watch it.
There is an old cathode ray tube TV in the corner, with some comfy armchairs in front. You sit down and watch curling.

Damn.

Ask if I can have the axe back if I leave. If so, leave, and cut the cold out of the air around me to keep warm.
"Can I have my axe back? I promise not to chop anything else."
She gives your axe back.
[3+1]
You walk out the door and start swinging your axe around, foaming at the mouth a bit.

Drink the hot chocolate and assess its quality.
Then, roll up the rim!

You drink the hot chocolate. It is very hot, very creamy, and very chocolatey. (+1 to the next cold resistance roll)
You rrroll up the rim.
[5]
You win a new Lada Signet. It's red.
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Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.
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