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LONGER? LONGER? WE AIN'T GONNA SURVIVE FOUR DAYS!

10 (26.3%)

HELL NO. Twelve days, maximum.

1 (2.6%)

Maybe. We'll get to around two weeks or so.

4 (10.5%)

Hell yes! We'll survive a whole month!

3 (7.9%)

HELL YES! We may get up to a year on this one!

3 (7.9%)

WE'LL HIT A THOUSAND YEARS FOR THE GLORY OF THE DWARVEN EMPIRE!

17 (44.7%)

Total Members Voted: 38

[CaptainArchmage]

SPARKGEAR XIV
(TUNNELGEAR THE SPARK OF MACHINES)

Caution: This thread may contain vile language, graphic descriptions of violence, and extreme levels of hubris and megalomania. You have been warned.

With the fall of Sparkgear XIII, 13 days after the fortress was established (real time), Sparkgear XIV is being established in the same world.

Here's the link to the previous game: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=128134.0

Rules
(Copied over from Sparkgear XIII)

Welcome to SparkGear the flashing, smashing DF sensation that will rock your world.
You know how in all those BRAND X succession games some douchebag always drags out his turn across three weeks and everyone else is like GAWD GET ON WITH IT? In here, we curbstomp fuckers like that. Your turn is twenty four hours. Nothing more, nothing less. Got your dad's crappy old 286 that runs DF in realtime? TOUGH SHIT. Got work? Call in sick. Class? Fuck that. Sleep? FOR PUSSIES.

In classic SparkGear there is only one rule: Don't talk ab DURING YOUR TURN, YOU ARE KING. Your predecessor made an awesome megaproject? Put a dick on it. Steal his royal bedroom. Put his avatar on latrine duty. (But being a dick will get you treated like a dick, so BEWARE). If the last sucker left you with an unplayable save (even FPS wise, SO DON'T LEAVE STONE LYING AROUND), revert to an older save. AND YOU BETTER UPLOAD THE MOTHERFUCKING SAVE ON TIME, MOTHERFUCKER.

Make sure you label your levers.

That's right, turns last 24 hours, and only 24 hours. I'm making turn changeover at midnight, Tokyo time.

Actually, we'll make it forum time, just this time.

You may EXTEND your turn by 24 hours, but you must play the extension whilst drunk or inebriated or or suffering from a form of temporary and induced mental impairment, such as lack of sleep. You must call the extension during your turn. If you get this extension, all players will have their turns pushed back by 24 hours. Deal with it.

You may MULTIPLAYER this using one of the Telnet clients that were lying around, if they can work. If you're going to multiplayer the turn, make sure you say so on your sign up. If you extend the turn, all players must be drunk or otherwise inebriated whilst running the fortress.

If an update to Dwarf Fortress comes out, we will play the latest version no matter how bug-ridden it is, unless version compatibility is broken.

When the fortress dies, we will begin a new thread. The new fortress will be created in the same world, unless a game-breaking update comes out, in which case a new world will be generated. 48 HOURS may be allotted to setting up a new fortress, WITHOUT any drunkenness requirements. Be sure to upload the save after the fortress falls.

Once your turn is finished, you may sign up for another turn.

I may be giving out some awards when this is done. I will not give details as to what the awards are, but they will either be given to a dwarf in the game, or to a player.

NEW RULES FOR SPARKGEAR XIV:

In general play, you may use DFhack for aspects of fortress management, such as to manage dwarves jobs. You may also use DFhack to perform bugfixes such as for the growth bug, item teleportation bug, fixing diplomats, fixing traders, and so on. You may also use DFhack to perform an FPS-saving repair such as preventing the ocean draining into an aquifer, but please tell us if you do this. Larger-scale DFhack actions may be authorized.

The individual setting up a new fortress may use DFhack without authorization to do some crazy stuff, even altering the way the game plays. The intention will be for the edited stuff to remain in permanent play, at least until someone decides to build their royal bedroom over it. If this is done, the player base should be informed. Creativity is encouraged.

It is acceptable to abuse bugs in the game, for example item teleportation.

Hospitals should not use coffers or chests if any adamantine mining or processing is attempted, unless running DFhack in a mode that prevents metal threads being used. I do not know if this exists (yet).

Quotes and Screenshots

-None yet-

Prologue

There are fourteen dwarven civilizations in The World of Cyclones:

The Boats of Mobbing (Kogan Odgúb)
The Mint Net (Gitnukkib)
The Everseeing Boats (Iluskogan)
The Mortal Treaty (Tunomilral)
The Infamous Flag (Sedishsolon)
The Chamber of Crowding (Mafol Thad)
The Living Abbey (Thunenkulet)
The Gorge of Lightning (Erib Giken)
The Contingent Rack (Mingtuthled)
The Staff of Emancipating (Nomal Kastol)The Snarling Mountain (Desisonol)
The Walls of Purifying (Adil Enam)
The Romantic Oil (âbiruzol)
The Gorge of Finding (Erib Atöl)

In the year 100, a rebellion erupted within the ranks of the royal guard of The Everseeing Boats. It failed, and the leader, ‘Female Caligula’, was sent to establish a new outpost in The Somber Hills to the north of the mountain range dominated by The Everseeing Boats. This became the great fortress of Sparkgear.

Following some sieges, the risen undead Caligula took over the body of one of the miners on the expedition and led a heroic expedition into the depths, extracting an immense quantity of adamantine and revealing the interior of an adamantine tube without endangering the fortress. While the successor to the fortress, Ieb, utilized the metal, when the Master took over the fortress underwent a great cataclysm and was destroyed soon after, in the year 105.

Nonetheless, Sparkgear was but the first significant bastion of dwarven civilization outside the Mountains. The Alliance of the fourteen dwarven nations sent colonists to the lands surrounding the mountains, establishing farming outposts, mining outposts, and military fortifications. With the discovery of the hollow adamantine tube, the dwarves set their sights even further down and further out. Adamantine was not only to be found in the mountains, it could be found anywhere and everywhere and it served as a gateway to some other place. That other place was clearly dangerous, but no-one had seen its true nature.

Map of the locations of The Boats of Mobbing, The Romantic Oil, and the Land of Dreams

In the year 105, when the fortress of Sparkgear fell, The Boats of Mobbing sent a diplomatic expedition to the The Infamous Flag to organize the new colonization effort in the eastern region of the world. As The Boats of Mobbing were better prepared, the preparation expedition journeyed to the Romantic Oil, a civilization in the sparsely inhabited eastern region of the world. Oceanic travel had increased dramatically since Sparkgear, and the expedition crossed three oceans during their journey to the Romantic Oil.  A key location was The Land of Dreams; it was an island, only accessible by boat, in the Seas of Hope. The Seas of Hope were surrounded by many volcanoes, but the island was otherwise free from enemies. It was the perfect location for a new dwarven city. The Everseeing Boats had supplied their intelligence on the adamantine, and The Romantic oil closest civilization to the seas, was willing to furnish some settlers.

On the return journey, disaster struck the travelers.

TURN LIST
(Some signed up turns carry over)

1st Turn: CaptainArchmage (establishing fortress)
Saturday 17th August 2013 (2nd Turn): Ezk1 (Skipped)
Sunday 18th August 2013 (3rd Turn): griffinpup (Skipped)
Monday 19th August 2013 (4th Turn): Matoro Gnorm
Tuesday 20th August 2013 (5th Turn): The Master
Wednesday 21st August 2013 (6th Turn): Vinedragon
Thursday 22nd August 2013 (7th Turn): Necrisha
Friday 23rd August 2013 (8th Turn): bp920091
Saturday 24th August 2013: Probably CaptainArchmage
Sunday 25th August 2013: Gnorm
Monday 26th August 2013 & Beyond: Free!

Dates will be added when the fortress has been properly set up and is ready to go.
Dates have been added. Hopefully this can get going now!

Players for Dwarfing

Sabretache as Douglas McArthur
Kourne

[CaptainArchmage]

WARNING
THIS LOG CONTAINS OFF-COLOR LANGUAGE,
VIOLENCE (against everything),
GORE,
AND ENVIRONMENTAL DEVASTATION.
IF EASILY OFFENDED
SCROLL DOWN TO THE YELLOW LINE
YOU HAVE BEEN !!WARNED!!

Count Fuck the World’s Journal
1st Granite, 106
A pox upon those goblin fiends for shooting up my ship!

Avast ye goblin scum! Count Fuck the World stands shipwrecked upon a shore, his ship foundered and his temper blown. What kind of elven shit went into that FUCKING vessel? Next time I see those people, they’re going to be sucking on a FUCKING wood pole down their throats. When I finally get around to catheterizing the fiends, they will be shitting sideways for the next few years. I don’t care whether they’re fiends or treehuggers. They’re gonna FUCKING pay.

I’m pissed, but I think we can salvage this. We got a weaponsmith and a mechanic, two miners, a carpenter, and a planter. I salvaged some of the goods. We have one wagon with an anvil, some ore, and some coal. We have about 40 units of alcohol, and 6 plump helmets. We also salvaged some seeds, and a few barrels of kangaroo and camel milk. We can process that into cheese to survive.

The FUCKING island we’re shipwrecked upon is known as The Land of Dreams, and it also happens to be a target for future settlement. The shore of the mainland is within sight, however. I suppose it is time to erect my glorious legacy upon this land.

We’re FUCKING alone on an island (except for the rest of us), but I can still certify the mapmakers as FUCKING tree-hugging idiot elf-sympathizer buffoons who should be consigned to scraping elephant shit out of the dining halls.  We’re supposed to have some God-Damn FUCKING mangrove trees around here in a FUCKING mangrove swamp, but I don’t see no FUCKING mangroves. Did those FUCKING arseholes just make this shit up? It looks like a FUCKING normal forest to me. Somebody needs to get those cocksuckers a stern lesson in the difference between a FUCKING swamp and a FUCKING forest because next time, we’re going to have an expedition to a FUCKING TROPICAL JUNGLE go to a FUCKING GLACIER.
 
Wait, if the map-makers were mistaken about the FUCKING mangrove swamp, could they have been FUCKING mistaken about the island being uninhabited. What could exist here?

7th Granite 106

We’ve finally got the FUCKING milk turned into cheese. Some of the white quartzite we salvaged from the wreck has been converted into blocks that can be used to build some of the fire-safe buildings we need to manufacture proper metal. In the meantime, we will have to live on the surface, as all digging implements were lost in the wreck.

1st Slate 106

It is quiet, far too FUCKING quiet. The only living things we have seen in the area are the crab people on the mainland. I think we should start arming ourselves. Master Greatbeard, the Bladeforger, says that we have recovered enough coal and ore from the forge room of the wreck to make some weapons.

Naturally, I took up the role of Militia Commander. I am also the fucking broker, since nobody else knows how to cut deals like me. Axis Intellentia, the Tech Wizard, is now the manager, one of the carpenters will be the chief medical dwarf, and one of the miners is now the bookkeeper. Hell, we aren’t digging anywhere soon. The cedar logs we recovered from the wreck has been carved into beds, while the rest of the wood is being used to build us some houses on the surface.

Axis Intellentia said he could obtain some surface plants to grow, so I had him do that. He returned with a fucking sugar cane and some plant called “hemp”. What is this I don’t even?

It was processed into thread and seeds, so we can plant some things at last.

1st Felsite 106

We built three houses, one for me and most of the others, one for A.I., and one for Greatbeard right next to the forge. That is all. Greatbeard said he will try to get some of the metal worked this month.

1st Hematite 106

The farms are up now. We are also growing things called “sweet potatoes”. I do not know what they are but they make good alcohol.

Master Greatbeard put up a “No Trespassing, man” sign over the hemp plantation and started growing sugarcane in his house. I am concerned about his sanity. However, we now have two halberds and two picks. I am told halberds can be used to cut trees, which is fine. The miners are going out to cut down some trees now, man. I want the Bladeforger to make some more weapons for us to PUNCH HOLES IN THOSE GOBLIN BASTARDS SO THEY SHIT SIDEWAYS!

26th Hematite 106

AVAST! Some more dwarves on the horizon! It looks like the ship’s medic and his family are here! They made it out of the wreck! Today is a good day to be Count Fuck the World! I’m having a house built for them out of teak, next door to Master Greatbeard.

I decided that having a few houses on a beach isn’t enough, so I’m having a tower built. I’m calling it Fortress Fuck the World. It will be MY FUCKIN TOWAH and NO FUCKING TREEHUGGERS NOR ANY GOBLIN FIENDS ARE GOING TO LAY SIEGE ON IT ON MY WATCH.

18th Malachite 106

I’ve made a few observations, and I’m not happy. Not happy at all. Firstly, the daughter of the ship’s doctor is 17, but nobody filled out the right paperwork, so she is still considered a “Dwarven Child”. That better be corrected soon.

Secondly, we’re running low on wood, and my tower has still to rise. I have ordered more trees cut down to remedy the situation.

19th Malachite 106

The fucking bureaucracy was FINALLY sorted out on îton’s 17th birthday. We finally have a full dwarven citizen ready to participate in society. I hope she will exchange places with one of the miners in cutting down the trees.

7th Galena 106

I’ve made some makeshift living arrangements for îton. It is difficult to get another house up while building the tower.

I still haven’t ordered any digging down. I believe we should secure the surface of this island before we risk drawing attention to ourselves. I’m also having a trade depot built. We don’t really have any trading goods yet, but I can make some crossbows to sell.

18th Galena 106

We have a dire lack of any kind of exercise equipment to keep our muscles in shape. Whilst forging weapons, planting and harvesting seeds, making furniture, and building a tower works our muscles, we're not getting anywhere near the level of exercise I would like. I'm putting on weight, and if I don't get a good workout in, my muscles are going to atrophy! I've decided to take action before it is too late.

1st Limestone 106

Just in time for Autumn, my gymnasium is finished!

Just in case any traders arrive, I installed some pillars to guide them in. They do not need to take a detour over the entire island to get to our depot.

I was hoping we could extract some clay from the ground to provide more building materials, but we cannot use "silty clay loam" for this purpose. The useful clay is on the other side of the ocean.

17th Sandstone 106

Finally! We sighted some of the shipwrecked survivors from the D.I.V. Magmatlantis!

Here's the full list of new arrivals:

"Necrisha" Avuz Kolikal, Boyer (female): one of the ship's crossbow-makers and also a skilled hunter and marksdwarf.
"Kourne" Zon Shetbêthkonos, Woodworker (female): Another one of the ship's marksdwarves and woodworkers.
"bp920091" Fikod Inethlanggud, Peasant (male): Hammerdwarf squad.
"The Master" Catten Agïteb, Metalsmith (female): One of the ship's blacksmiths under Master Greatbeard, competant hammerdwarf.
"Gnorm" Deler Mountainrights, Fishery Worker (male): One of the fishery dwarves who helped keep the Magmatlantis stocked with fish.
"Douglas McArthur" Blackadeblushes, Fishery Worker (male): Axedwarf captain on the Magmatlantis
"Ezk1" Rigòthmafol, Farmer (female): Speardwarf captain on the Magmatlantis
Zon Galleyashes, Dwarven Child (female)
Fath Silverygifts, Dwarven Child (male)
Mafol Tongsgold, Dwarven Child (male)
Sodel Glovedoor, Dwarven Child (female)

We're going to need a lot more housing now.

Note by CaptainArchmage: D.I.V. Stands for Dwarven Imperial Vessel

23rd Sandstone 106

I immediately re-assigned some of the major jobs when the migrants came. "Vinedragon", the ship's doctor who made it to our settlement in Hematite, is now the Chief Medical Dwarf, as he is also the only individual with any medical training. Medical expertise is apparently pretty fucking important when it comes to being a doctor.

"bp920091" the hammerdwarf is now our sheriff of our Fortress.

I picked "The Master" as our Hammerer. "The Master", a pupil of Master Greatbeard the Bladeforger, is kind of a polymath of metallurgy. She isn't skilled in the art of weapon smithing, but rather has novice competence in all other areas of metalsmithing. This makes her the most competent individual we have for blacksmithing, metalcrafting, and armoring. Better still, she has military skills and is a competent hammerdwarf, and a novice and the use of the shield, the use of armor, and dodging. I appreciate that the one who shall dispense dwarven justice upon the fiends who sunk the Magmatlantis is both skilled in the use of hammers and the manufacture of the other metal items we need.

Finally, Douglas McArthur is the new militia commander. Wait what? Maybe I was too drunk at the time, but I'm used to taking a crossbow or two into battle with my own initiative. I've assigned myself to be a miltia captain, and I'm the squad leader of The Constructive Charms. Sexy. Everyone except Necrisha, who brought her own crossbow (made out of mithril), will be using the crossbows I just made. Now, we just need to find some ammunition.

Douglas McArthur will lead The Golden Roars, but I don't have any spare equipment for him since all our halberds are in use by our woodcutters.

I found The Master standing around our landing site and muttering to herself about the elves causing the Sparkgear Cataclysm, at the fortress of Sparkgear which fell last year. I had heard a rumour while our the expedition left the Mountainhomes that in Sparkgear, most of the walls and floors on the ground floor had suddenly been ordered for deconstruction, which caused the surface architecture to crumble and cause devastation, including holes punched into the underground regions of the fortress. I consulted Master Greatbeard, who said we should put up some supports in buildings, since supports will not be removed in such a situation, and they can hold up the upper levels of the fortress. I've ordered some supports installed around my tower, just in case.

We're running low on the fucking trees, and the frontier of the forest becomes ever more distant. I think we'll need to strike the earth properly now. The trouble is the miners have been cutting down trees all year.

28th Sandstone 106

Today, Master Greatbeard told me that Axis Intellentia was hidden in his room, muttering something. This is a strange phenomenon! I thought dwarves needed to be exposed to large spaces underground for these to happen! We haven't been fucking underground for months now, at least since we left The Romantic Oil.

Here is the lore from the Tome of Artefactes:

But one dwarf may be under the influence of a strange mood at once, and the dwarf may make but one artefact in his or her lifetime. A community of at least twenty eligible dwarves is required for a mood to strike, and a mood can only strike if the number of artefacts made by the fortress has not reached an upper limit. The limit on artefact production in a settlement is set by the lower of the number of items created divided by a hundred, or the number of revealed underground sectors.

Note by CaptainArchmage: I've taken this information from the Wiki and archaified the writing style.

According to the Tome of Artefacts, as we have not struck the Earth, so we should not be having any strange moods! The lower limit of artefacts would be zero!

4th Timber 106

Maxim Emin struck the earth beneath Fortress Fuck the World today. We have a layer of loam, a layer of silt, a layer of fire clay, and finally a layer of silty clay loam before the Bauxite bedrock. This is good news! We can extract the fire clay to finish off the walls of our fortress.

6th Timber 106

We built a Mechanic's Workshop and Axis Intellentia claimed it, grabbed the boulder of Bauxite at the bottom of the stairwell, and began work on something.

I'm now going to design a kiln so we can issue orders for clay collection.
9th Timber 106

"bp920091" finished building the kiln today. Meanwhile, I got try out my new gymnasium.

Because wood components were used, the setting is far too low for my preference. However, it is better than nothing.

10th Timber 106

Today, Axis Intellentia finished his artefact - bauxite mechanisms! Now I can fuck the world properly with The Subtle Bends. As they are made out of Bauxite, they are magma safe and can survive the fucking heat.

5th Moonstone 106

This is going to be my last log. The dwarven traders came and we sold some of the wooden corkscrews for more food, booze, animals, metal, and leather. I've just negotiated a trade agreement with the Mountainhome.

We finished the roof of the gymnasium, which is now my bedroom. I want to have it moved up a story though.

We dug down and created a farming area and a storage area. We also hit a vein of native copper.

We now have a lot of spare fire clay.

Finally, we had a lot of kobolds. I've had the artefact lever installed in the last roof level.

=====================

SAVE: http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=7906

Possible bugs: We only have 4 crab people as wild creatures. They have been there since the beginning. Not sure why nothing else is spawning.

-Post Reserved-

You can go ahead and post your stuff now.

[The Master]

GIMMIE A TURN DAMN IT!
_please?

If possible, name a dwarf The Master and give him the profession of Resident Psychopath.

[Sabretache]

Requesting a dwarf: Douglas McAuthur. Profession: Military?
I may wish to take a turn but don't put my name up or anything.

This fortress shall never fail!

[Kourne]

If possible I want to be dorfed, profession of your choice.
Maybe I have read over it, but what's the plan for the starting area?

[Ezk1]

Maybe I have read over it, but what's the plan for the starting area?

There was a plan?

[Vinedragon]

Welp, i'm definitely joining in. SIGN ME UP

Also, am I reading this right? Damn near anything goes?

[CaptainArchmage]

Apologies for the wait. Its going to take a bit for me to sexify the embark to the extent that it should, and this requires some learning of DFhack.

I can confirm that you will have some DFHack'd stuff in this embark. I can also confirm that its not going to be of the "metric fuckton of adamantine wafers" kind of DFHack'd stuff.

Welp, i'm definitely joining in. SIGN ME UP

Also, am I reading this right? Damn near anything goes?

As in the post, you are king for your turn to do what you want, unless it writes so in the rules. However, when your turn is over, if you have been a dick other people might be dicks too. For example, by putting your tomb in the garbage pit or in the sewers.

[Necrisha]

well I'll sign up for a turn- and I learned my lesson on Exultationhexxed- err cheesefurnace don't play with old programs while involved in a succession game. It's murder on the operating system. Nothing says !!fun!! like new ways to corrupt your BIOS...

[CaptainArchmage]

well I'll sign up for a turn- and I learned my lesson on Exultationhexxed- err cheesefurnace don't play with old programs while involved in a succession game. It's murder on the operating system. Nothing says !!fun!! like new ways to corrupt your BIOS...

How did you even manage that?

[bp920091]

24 hours for a turn? Sounds great. I'll take a spot.

Do I get bonus points for playing drunk during the first day?

[CaptainArchmage]

24 hours for a turn? Sounds great. I'll take a spot.

Do I get bonus points for playing drunk during the first day?

No. As it is, I need to choose between getting this thing going and gateivory. gateivory can wait for now. I tried playing a bit of the setup for Sparkgear XIV, but it got heavily delayed. I think I may play and put the save up for this weekend though. There WILL be outstanding players from the last game, which rapidly went to hell after The Master ordered most of the constructions at ground level to be deconstructed.

Edit: OK I hope to have the game done soon, so the next person should be playing on Caturday (MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA). I will hand it over then and allow the players approximately 24 hours. This time, please don't designate everything at the ground level for demolition. Fuck that its going to happen anyway.

Edit2: I have the first half of the year up now. I'll do what I can to finish this and get some images up.

Edit3: It may take me until early tomorrow to have the fort in the "good to go" state (1 year startup). Hopefully I can finish quickly, I have 100FPS and that's my cap.

Edit4: I will take a bit longer to get it to 1st Granite, so a full year of setup is there. Everyone has a named dwarf, I think. In fact, all dwarves save one adult and the four children are named. I've reassigned some of the noble positions, Vinedragon is now the Chief Medical Dwarf (was Ship's Doctor), bp920091 is now the Sheriff, the Master is now the Hammerer, and Douglas McArthur is likely to become either the Militia Commander or a Militia Captain.

[Gnorm]

This sounds like its going to be a chaotic, confused, tantrum spiral right into Hell!

I'll take the 25th.

[CaptainArchmage]

This sounds like its going to be a chaotic, confused, tantrum spiral right into Hell!

I'll take the 25th.

Sorry about the mess. I've updated everyone, I think.

SAVE IS HERE: http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=7906

Kobolds came early. We don't have much created wealth.

Ezk1 YOU ARE NOW UP.

Edit: Just messaged Ezk1

[Sabretache]

Yarrr! By my beard matey, that twas a marvelous update.