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[Jembot]

Oh exactly

[GreatWyrmGold]

I find it funny to watch them squirm.

Xantalos, you are horrible.

[Xantalos]

I find it funny to watch them squirm.

Xantalos, you are horrible.

That's partially the point.

[Weirdsound]

Prelude: Storming the Castle

Turn 10

Fig-Gnasher: Ready an action to attack any enemy cutebold that comes within reach. Guard Gladys.
X, Albus: CHARGE! The nearer one, to be specific.
Gladys: Um...Whatever you want, I guess. Just don't hurt Fig-Gnasher or yourself. By the way, Fig-Gnasher, is it fine if I call you Figgy?

"Ish no moar insultine then mah currant nam. I ish fien with it."

"The bigger Kobolds love to give their Cutebold kinfolk names that imply they are vegetarians, impotent, or not bigoted enough towards the other races; which incidentally are the three most insulting things you can call a Kobold. Its actually hilarious.... Although now that I brought that up, I have a feeling you Cutebold lovers may just try to change his name completely or something... Actualy, considering the type of name GWG is giving out in this game, he might just get something even dumber... hehehe"

"Ish tru. Maeg I just murdereredz was caled Halfwing-Hugger."

Alright. Lets get on with it. X and Albus are already in reach of the Kobold attacking them, so a charge is not necessary. I coooooooouuuld be a dick literal genie GM and make them back off first and then charge, provoking an AoO, but I think I'll behave myself for now.

X takes the first swing this time, the roll is only a 6, but her very good attack bonus of 5 is more than enough to make the swordswipe hit its foe. The attack nails the cutebold in the gut for 5 damage, badly wounding it.

Albus goes next, and strikes back at the cutebold who attacked it last turn. The Wolfmutt's attack roll is also a six, and his bonus of 3 is only enough to make it tie with the adorable creature's AC...

...Well I seem to be in the habit of giving ties to the party. I think I will keep that up until the worst possible moment to lose a tie. The attack hits, and because Albus' minimum damage of 3 is more than the Kobold has in terms of HP...

Albus tears out the Cutebold's Throat, and it falls to the ground dead!


"Aroooooooo!"

Fig-Gnasher readies an attack for when the last Cutebold inevitably approaches...

...The last cutebold inevitably approaches, and the two evenly matched creatures exchange blows!

As he had prepared his action, Fig-Gnasher gets to attack first. His attack hits dead on with an attack roll of 19! His damage roll is five, and with a damage bonus of 1 the last foe is brought down to 1 HP!

As usual in a situation where the final foe is brought down to less than 5% health or 1 HP, it begs for its life.

"I can haz mercies plz? Pweety plz?"

"No. You shud no haz mercy. U kno Fig-Gnasher is raec trader and shud die so othor Cutebolds dunt know Fig-Gnasher is Race-Trader!"

"As much as it pains me to agree with Fig-Gnasher... KILL IT FIGGY! MURDER IT DEAD"

Gods above, you guys sure get lucky with those last foes. I guess it is up to you all if you want another adorable and totally trustworthy Cutebold on the party, or if you should just kill the bastard. Do remember you are down to your last healing spell and some of the party is a little scratched up.

None of the loot this time is heavy or useful enough that it matters who carries it, but you can argue about that anyway. Assuming you kill the last 'bold loot is as follows:

+4 Cutebold Loincloths
+2 Cutebold Knifes
+2 Dog Skull Mage Hats
+2 Cutebold Spellbooks
+4 Kobold Rations
The last Kobold will be holding a knife, a loincloth, and a ration if you spare it.

Also, Fig-Gnasher got a level up from that impressive performance, but all he gets out of it is 1 max HP. If he survives one more battle, he hits level three and can choose to practice magic or go nuclear.

Last but not least, you should choose where to go next. If you intend to aim for that treasure room, you can go Northeast or Southeast to get closer. Also you can exit the dungeon and end the Prelude now if you are worried about low health/spell reserves, or just want to grab teamwork level-ups.
---

Party Stats:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Name: Quigleyurk-the-Jobfic, ov-Zantmydsawp 'X' *Current Main Character*
Race: Halfling
Level: 5
Survive 4 more combat encounters to level up!

HP: 20/20
Movement: 4 meters per round (Currently Using Albus' Movement)
Weapon On Hand: Dwarven Shortsword (+5 Attack Bonus, 1d10+3 Damage)
Ranged Weapon Readied: Crossbow (+3 Attack Bonus, 1d8+2 Damage, 20 Ammo, Must be reloaded)
Armor: Halfling Sized Plate armor With Shield (AC 16)

Other Items:
Steel Shortsword (+4 Attack Bonus, 1d8+1 Damage)
Dog Leash
5 days worth of halfling sized meals
1 Cutebold Spell Book

Abilities:
Divine Dog-Rider: You and your gear are never burdensome to a properly saddled and friendly riding dog.
Chindook’s Dungeon Sense: Once per dungeon you may choose to reveal a Treasure Trove, a Recruitment Chance, or a Bonus Boss on the Dungeon Map.
Ride Down: You can charge through a small foe while mounted, attacking it with a +3 attack bonus and 2d4+2 damage. This does not provoke AoOs but it does count as your action for the turn. You cannot ride down more than two foes per battle.

Spells:
Lesser Healing (Melee Range or Self, Heals 3d6+2 HP, 2 uses per dungeon) 1 Left
Holy Fireball (6m Range. Inflicts 2d6+1 Damage, 2 uses per dungeon) 1 Left
Summon Lesser Holy Beast (1 use per dungeon)

Chemistry:
GreatWyrmGold +2
scapheap +2
IronyOwl +7
Xantalos +4

---


Name: Gladys Whisperer
Race: Fey
Level: 4
Survive 2 more combat encounters to level up!

HP: 7/11
Movement: 6 meters per round
Weapon On Hand: Fey Shortsword of Chaos (+4 Attack Bonus, 1d8+1 Normal Damage and 2 Chaos Damage)
Armor: Quick Reflexes (AC 13)

Other Items:
Black Cloth Outfit
Potion of Invisibility
Enchanted Fuzzy Pink Handcuffs of One Size Fits All

Abilities:
Target Vitals: Gladys threatens a critical hit on a natural 18-20.
Outwit Caster: Gladys automatically avoids the first hostile spell that is cast on her in each dungeon.
Dirty Rotten Thief: Gladys will steal an item or some gold from her foe on a 16 or higher melee attack roll
Fey Wings: A Fey can pass over any terrain unhindered, and may make an AoO aimed at her miss once per round of combat

Spells:
Corrupt (4m Range. The target must save or become a lesser chaos spawn. Corrupted creatures have a 50/50 chance of becoming temporary allies. Does not work on boss monsters. 1 Use per dungeon)

Chemistry:
IronyOwl + 1

---

Name: Fig-Gnasher
Race: Cutebold
Level: 2
Survive 1 more combat encounters to level up!

HP: 8/8
Movement: 2 meters per round
Weapon On Hand: Cutebold Knife (+2 Attack Bonus, 1d6+1 Damage)
Armor: I ish too cute to make ded? Right? (AC 9)

Other Items:
1 Cutebold Loincloth
1 Cutebold Spellbook
2 Dog Skull Wizard Hats
5 Kobold Rations
2 Spare Cutebold Daggers
1 Stone of Chaotic Evolution (Use on a level 6-9 Character. That character instantly gains a level and a new chaotic flavored form)
1 Godhood Ballot (A character can use a Godhood Ballot to vote for any player he/she has 10 or more chemistry with to become a god. A player obtains godhood once three ballots are cast in his or her name)
1 Seal of Authority (Can be used to recruit an adjacent enemy of the same race as the user who is also 2 or more levels lower than the user)

Cutebold Wardrobe x3 (Tier 6 Loot Set)
2 Cutebold Loincloth per set

Nuclear-Cutebold Gear (Tier 5 Loot Set, Heavy -2 Movement)
1 Uranium Chain mail Shirt
1 Uranium Short Sword

Abilities:
Opportunistic Attacker: When making an attack of opportunity, a Cutebold gains a +4 bonus to attack roll and damage
Cutebold Growth: Fig-Gnasher can become a Nuclear-Cutebold or Cutebold-Mage upon reaching level 3.
Loyal Kobold: Has a 1/6th chance of defecting to the enemy side at the start of an encounter against Kobolds of any kind. This ability will vanish when Fig-Gnasher gains 5 Chemistry with a player, or a teamwork level with another PC.

Spells:
None Yet

Chemistry:
GreatWyrmGold +3
Bunnybob77 +2
Harbingerjm +3
Xantalos -2

---


Name: Albus
Race: Canine
Level: 4
Survive 2 more combat encounters to level up!

HP: 11/13
Movement: 8 meters per round (Currently Ferrying 'X')
Weapon On Hand: Teeth (+3 Attack Bonus, 1d8+2 Damage)
Armor: Thick fur and swift reflexes (AC 14)

Other Items:
Dog Saddle
Dog Harness

Abilities:
Hunter: At the start of each encounter Albus has a 1/6 chance of finding a bonus foe. A bonus foe found this way is generally no more dangerous than the other foes in the fight, and drops cool swag when it dies.
Tracker: Albus has a 3/5 chance of being able to track any scent he picks up. The chance is lower if the thing you are tracking is taking active steps to avoid being tracked.

Spells:
Fangs of Butchery (For rest of combat +2 Attack Bonus, +1 Damage Bonus, and the Butcher's Touch buff to caster. 1 use per Dungeon)

Chemistry:
Dariush +2

Battle Map:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1 Meter = The size of X's Token on the map

Enemy Stats:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Kobold Cutebold

A charming creature that loves nothing more than killing and eating halflings. It wields a fangs and a knife. It wears animal skins if anything at all. Please ignore my fingers on the pog, I photographed it myself.

Attack: +2 Base Attack Bonus, 1d6+1 Damage
Defense: AC 9, 7 Max HP
Opprotunistic Attacker: When making an attack of opprotunity, a Cutebold gains a +4 bonus to attack roll and damage

---

Kobold Cutebold Mage

A charming creature that loves nothing more than magicly killing and eating halflings. It wields a fangs and spells. It wears animal skins if anything at all, and a ceromonial dog-skull hat. It is attuned to the elements of water and air.

Attack: +2 Base Attack Bonus, 1d6+1 Damage
Defense: AC 5, 8 Max HP
Water Attuned Mage: A Cutebold mage takes half damage from the water element, and can learn two water element spells in a situation where he or she could learn one spell.
Air Attuned Mage: A Cutebold mage takes half damage from the air element, and can learn two air element spells in a situation where he or she could learn one spell.

Spells:
Air Missile (15m Range. Inflicts 2d4+1 Damage, 4 uses per dungeon)
Spawn-Water-In-Lungs (3m Range, Inflicts the drowning debuff, 4 uses per dungeon)
Cutebold Twister (Creates a 2m Blast anywhere in sight. Inflicts 1d4+2 Damage, 2 uses per dungeon)
Riverblade (Targets any weapon within 10m. That weapon inflicts two additional water damage for the rest of the battle, 2 uses per dungeon)

Dungeon Map:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Map Key:
The brown boxes are rooms...
A room containing a sword in a stone alter is a Treasure Trove...
A room containing a purple eye is under the heavy influence of a chaotic god...
The lines show which rooms connect to each other...
The main character represents the parties current location in the dungeon...
The exit sign is the dungeon exit you are trying to reach

[Harry Baldman]

Yeah, go ahead and slay that kobold, Fig-Gnasher. Seal your partnership with X in blood.

[scapheap]

He your kin, you decide, Fig.

[GreatWyrmGold]

Quigleyurk: Ask if the cutebold will follow us without healing.

Figgy: Kill the other kobold if he (she?) says no.

Head southeast.

[Weirdsound]

Doh. I forgot that Quigleyurk-the-Jobfic, ov-Zantmydsawp has leveled up as well. The dice love our main character, so she gains the maximum 6 HP she can get as a halfling. Also pick between one of the following two abilities for her!

Ride Down: You can charge through a small foe while mounted, attacking it with a +3 attack bonus and 2d4+2 damage. This does not provoke AoOs but it does count as your action for the turn. You cannot ride down more than two foes per battle.
Cross Your Bows and Dot Your Foes: You gain an extra +2 attack bonus with the crossbow, and threaten a crossbow critical hit on an attack roll of 18-20.

[scapheap]

I like the sound of Cross Your Bows and Dot Your Foes.

[GreatWyrmGold]

I like the sound of Cross Your Bows and Dot Your Foes.

Agreed. However, Quigleyurk is our only good melee character at the moment, so making her ranged might not be a great idea.

[Lenglon]

X gets Ride Down, despite how cool Cross Your Bows and Dot Your Foes sounds

Spare the cutebold to give Gladys a toy, Gladys should get more toys

((I want to speak without the characters hearing me. can I keep text inside double-parens hidden?))

Go northeast so we can exit if things go sour, but right now we would benefit from more exploration and looting

[Weirdsound]

((I want to speak without the characters hearing me. can I keep text inside double-parens hidden?))

Hrrrrmmm.... why not? But you can't give commands/instructions/suggestions unless everybody can hear

[BunnyBob77]

Trust Fig-Gnasher and kill the kobold.  Give the kobold rations, one of the hats, and one of the spellbooks to Fig-Gnasher.  X can have the other spellbook., Also continue the prelude and head northeast towards the treasure trove.

[GreatWyrmGold]

((Oh, yeah? Figgy: Juggle loincloths.))

[Lenglon]

((look, it could be usefull for different players to pick specific characters and cater to that character's specific wishes, even if it's against the good of the party as a whole. they'll just *coincidentally* get outvoted so it doesn't happen. that way when we need influence, we'll have someone with the leverage we need.))