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[Sappho]

Haha, I wouldn't fault anyone for honesty. In fact I try both of those regularly. Actually the smoking tends to make my mind even more active even as it relaxes my body, so it can be counterproductive sometimes. The other form of relaxation is sometimes helpful but sometimes not. It's a bit less simple for girls. Sometimes it does work though!

[Sappho]

Alright, I've got an idea for a new "experiment." Aside from keeping general track of my ups and downs (probably will be too busy to track by hour but I'll try to make clear mental notes when I can), I'm giving myself a simple rule. Every time I start to feel depressed, I have to do push-ups. Just drop to the ground as soon as there is a suitable place to do so (I'm usually at home so that's easy enough) and do a few push-ups. The number will depend on the day. I'm trying to increase the length of my morning sets by one per day, and that will carry over to these "depression sets." This morning I did 3 sets of 5. Tomorrow I'll do 3 sets of 6, plus 6 more when I start to feel the depression creeping up. I know it probably won't be enough to chase the depression away completely, at least at first, but once I get stronger and am doing longer sets, it should help a lot more. And even if it doesn't help with the depression, it will at least help me get stronger faster.

I'll keep track of how I feel during this, try to see if it helps, or what effect it has. I did it twice today already and I have to admit, though it didn't cure me, I did feel a bit better afterward.

Does anyone else want to try this along with me? More data is always good!

[GlyphGryph]

I'd love to, but I think I'd need another trigger. I've been mercifully free of "being down" as a regular thing the last few months.

[scrdest]

Alright, I've got an idea for a new "experiment." Aside from keeping general track of my ups and downs (probably will be too busy to track by hour but I'll try to make clear mental notes when I can), I'm giving myself a simple rule. Every time I start to feel depressed, I have to do push-ups. Just drop to the ground as soon as there is a suitable place to do so (I'm usually at home so that's easy enough) and do a few push-ups. The number will depend on the day. I'm trying to increase the length of my morning sets by one per day, and that will carry over to these "depression sets." This morning I did 3 sets of 5. Tomorrow I'll do 3 sets of 6, plus 6 more when I start to feel the depression creeping up. I know it probably won't be enough to chase the depression away completely, at least at first, but once I get stronger and am doing longer sets, it should help a lot more. And even if it doesn't help with the depression, it will at least help me get stronger faster.

I'll keep track of how I feel during this, try to see if it helps, or what effect it has. I did it twice today already and I have to admit, though it didn't cure me, I did feel a bit better afterward.

Does anyone else want to try this along with me? More data is always good!

I'm not sure if push-ups is optimal exercise as depression-fighting method. The idea is that you use up a lot of oxygen for an extended period of time, to which the brain reacts with releasing a fuckton of endorfins, which make you feel nice and happy. Push-ups are generally taxing, but the exercise doesn't take very long.

[Sappho]

It doesn't take long, but you get endorphins from anything that is physically difficult, and when you are as weak as I am, a few push-ups is most definitely taxing, and I feel the after-effects for a little while afterwards. When I do my sets in the morning, the first one isn't bad, then I take a 30 second breather, then the second set is difficult, then I take a 30 second breather, then the third set is nearly impossible to complete - my arms feel like rubber by the end. And that's just sets of 5. I think exercise can be plenty beneficial even if it doesn't take a long time.

In any case, it's an experiment. I'd try going for a run, but I have asthma and it would take ages to build up the lung capacity for that to be as useful as push-ups. Anyway, push-ups are something I can quickly do whenever I feel myself getting down. If it took a long time, I would have to prepare for it and motivate myself to get started, which would be impossible, given I'm trying to fight depression. A quick "drop and give me 5" to myself whenever I notice myself starting to feel down might be just enough of a push to get me moving before I have a chance to think too much about it, and once I'm up and moving around it's easier to keep going, rather than flopping down onto my bed and soaking the pillow in pointless tears.

Doing it has got to be better than not doing it. It doesn't have to solve the whole problem to be useful.

[DJ]

I started doing push ups etc. this spring to help my back pain (I spend way too much time in a chair), but I can say it definitely improved my overall mood as well.

[Sappho]

Yes, I have high hopes for the push-ups experiment. At the very least, if I can regularly force myself to get up and do even a tiny bit of exercise every time I start feeling crappy, it'll keep me from sitting around thinking too much, which ought to help a lot. Plus... Muscles!

I'm not sure if I've mentioned on here how much I've relied on Cracked.com articles for a lot of my understanding of my own brain and life. I know it's just a humor web site, and I'm sure the information isn't 100% accurate all the time, but there is a lot of truth on there, presented in a very clear and direct way (even funny), making it easy for me to understand. Perhaps these articles will be of use to some of you - if not, they're still entertaining.

http://www.cracked.com/article_17061_reminder-5-things-you-think-will-make-you-happy-but-wont.html
http://www.cracked.com/article_20035_7-things-you-wont-believe-science-says-make-you-happy.html
http://www.cracked.com/article_20398_5-ways-your-brain-tricking-you-into-being-miserable.html
http://www.cracked.com/article_17103_5-ways-your-brain-messing-with-your-head.html
http://www.cracked.com/article_19376_5-scientific-reasons-your-idea-happiness-wrong.html

There are many more, but that's a good start. I'm re-reading some of them now to remind me to pay better attention to my habits.

I'm missing training this morning because I have a dentist appointment in a few hours. Dentists are a sensory nightmare and I'm going specifically because I know I have at least one cavity which is starting to hurt too much to ignore. Considering bringing a thermos of calming tea to drink right before I go in (I don't want to use diazepam for a quick dentist visit, especially since I might not even get the filling today - I might have to just get the Xray today and go back in a week or so...). Trying to think of ways to distract myself while I'm in that chair to try to keep the anxiety level down. Maybe try to write out another chapter of my book in my head. That can be surprisingly helpful. Maybe I'll run from the tram to the office, try to get a bit of an endorphin rush going?

[Siquo]

Someone advised me to read this: http://www.urbandharma.org/pdf/mindfulness_in_plain_english.pdf
It's a how-to-start-with-meditation guide, and apparently can help overcome chronic terminal ennui. Haven't started on it yet (of course), as procrastination is way more important. Will report if I get results.


Well, at least you inspired me to try new stuff to get things out of their status quo, Sappho. Let me give you the official medal of Inspirational Role Model.

[scrdest]

Actually, turns out my data was... outdated (BA-dum-TISH). It's not endorphins but phenyletylamine.

As it happens, I am asthmatic too, although it doesn't show up until I either exercise or take a good whiff of allergens (though I suspect the former simply leads to the latter - I am slightly allergic to grasses (and, sadly, VERY allergic to cat fur - tell that to my Persian). But the point is pretty much to have too little oxygen, so that brain tries to calm itself.

[Sappho]

Siquo: Thanks for the link. I've just read through the introduction and first chapter and I'm actually finding it kind of funny - the themes discussed are the same ones that David Wong is always putting in those cracked.com articles, the ones I've been using to shape my perception and attitudes and become a generally more satisfied person (or at least someone who's not so easily upset, who doesn't hold on to bad feelings, who appreciates that anticipation of happiness is actually more effective than experiencing it, who makes a point of taking the more difficult road whenever possible simply because it's been proven to increase overall good feelings, etc.).

I have tried several types of meditation before, and failed utterly no matter how consistently and intensely I tried. After some long discussions with a friend of mine who studies neurology, we came to the conclusion that meditation techniques are designed to work with a neurotypical mind. Autistic brains really do work fundamentally differently from neurotypical ones. We process information differently, we perceive things differently... our whole world is different. Even the pathways and connections in our brains are measurably different. Trying to impose these methods of "mindfulness" and meditation and any other way of trying to control your mind and your thinking simply don't work on an autistic mind. (We are highly resistant to things like optical illusions and inattention blindness, for example, and things like chanting mantras have no effect on my thought processes whatsoever.) On top of that, I feel a constant need to move my body, and trying to hold it still just increases my levels of stress and anxiety, so that rules out most types of meditation right off the bat. I have found a few autistic people who say meditation is useful for them, but most seem to get the same results as me: it just doesn't work. We just can't make our minds do that.

Still, I'll read through the PDF and give it a try. It's not likely to hurt me any. : ) And it might be useful! I'll let you know what I think after I've read it.

As for the medal of Inspirational Role Model, I thank you! I didn't imagine that my little experiments would be too useful or interesting to anyone who wasn't me, but I'm pleasantly surprised to see that I can have a positive impact on other people.

I was discussing these experiments with a friend of mine over lunch the other day, actually, and she seemed impressed as well. She said she liked my approach to this stuff; she said it's like I'm "hacking" my brain and my life. I thought that was pretty excellent.

Scrdest: It sounds like you're talking about the "runner's high" - the huge rush of happy chemicals you get from pushing your body and lungs really hard for a long time. For sure this is a real thing, and I'm sure it's very effective, but it takes a lot of hard work and motivation to get to that point. This is not the only way to reap a psychological/neurological benefit from exercise. Even a tiny amount of exercise improves your overall mood. Regular amounts of tiny exercise not only keep you a bit healthier, they make you feel better about yourself, and yes, cause a release of those happy chemicals in your brain as reward for a physical accomplishment. All the research I've seen shows that our brains reward us for *all* actions that have a physical result. Compare two people who live identically in every way, except one of them always takes the stairs and the other always takes the elevator/escalator, and you'll definitely see a difference in their happiness levels.

Speaking of which, every time I ride the metro here in Prague (pretty much daily), I make sure to walk both up and down the escalators leading down to the platforms. It's not a lot of exercise, but when I started doing it, I noticed a difference pretty quickly. Especially walking up - escalator stairs are bigger than normal steps, and at first I was getting winded just walking to the top. Now I can fast-walk up the long escalators (that take 2 minutes to ride from bottom to top if you don't walk) and barely be out of breath when I finish. These little things are always a good idea.

An incredibly lazy friend of mine takes great joy in reciting this quote, no idea where it came from: "Never sit when you can stand, never stand when you can walk, never walk when you can run." He usually recites this while slouching in a comfortable chair watching reruns of House on the computer. I'm definitely a lot happier overall than he is. ; )

Here's another good article. It's the first David Wong article I ever read, and it changed the way I approached everything in my life: http://www.cracked.com/article_15231_7-reasons-21st-century-making-you-miserable.html

Oh, and one more - this one gave me a huge boost to my social skills and finally made me understand some of the reasons why people had been reacting negatively to things I said, my whole life: http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-youre-accidentally-making-everyone-hate-you/

[Siquo]

Here's another good article. It's the first David Wong article I ever read, and it changed the way I approached everything in my life: http://www.cracked.com/article_15231_7-reasons-21st-century-making-you-miserable.html

Those are pretty good articles you linked. I also saw that he wrote "John dies at the end", which I really liked and deserves way more than a 6.4 on IMDB.

[scrdest]

I'm a bit wary about listening to whatever Cracked says, since they have an annoying tendency to be biased, use misinterpreted data or common misconceptions just as often as they point all those out.

Then there's the fact that psychology sometimes shows that what average Joe-comedy-writer would do in a certain situation, as intuitive it may seem, is a completely wrong course of action. For example, if you see someone who is depressed and convinced of his worthlessness, trying to tell him otherwise worsens the problem - because you are, essentially, telling him his feels are inferior to your feels.

[Siquo]

I'm a bit wary about listening to whatever Cracked says, since they have an annoying tendency to be biased, use misinterpreted data or common misconceptions just as often as they point all those out.

Except that it's Cracked. The fact that it's a comedy site that is not to be taken seriously at all is healthier way to make a serious point than to pretend one is an authority and present ones view as the one and only way (hi psychologists).

[scrdest]

I'm a bit wary about listening to whatever Cracked says, since they have an annoying tendency to be biased, use misinterpreted data or common misconceptions just as often as they point all those out.

Except that it's Cracked. The fact that it's a comedy site that is not to be taken seriously at all is healthier way to make a serious point than to pretend one is an authority and present ones view as the one and only way (hi psychologists).

Wait, what? Did you just write that the best way to make a point is to be both unreliable and actively ask people not to believe what you say? That's a refreshing approach to persuasion. I'll try it someday.

[Sappho]

I'm a bit wary about listening to whatever Cracked says, since they have an annoying tendency to be biased, use misinterpreted data or common misconceptions just as often as they point all those out.

Except that it's Cracked. The fact that it's a comedy site that is not to be taken seriously at all is healthier way to make a serious point than to pretend one is an authority and present ones view as the one and only way (hi psychologists).

Agreed. Presenting such things as comedy seems the far better choice to me than presenting yourself as an expert and telling someone what to do. Scrdest, you could also say it this way: they point out misinterpreted data and common misconceptions just as often as they use them, which is more than you could say for most so-called experts.

The authors of these articles make you laugh even as they point out your shortcomings. Making something funny will almost always make the audience more receptive to the intended message. If someone came up to me and said "all those things that you think will make you happy will only make you miserable and you're doomed if you don't listen to me" I'd tell them to fuck right off. If, on the other hand, they make a joke out of it, point out that they themselves make this same mistake all the time, and present it as something new and interesting rather than being preachy, I will listen to what they have to say and it might even change my life.

If David Wong was a psychologist explaining all this to me in a serious manner, he would have exactly zero positive impact on my life. I've heard enough so-called experts lecture me with useless ramblings that I just tune it out now. Instead, he's just a regular guy who's noticed some things about people and life, found some scientific research to back himself up, and presented it in a funny way which I enjoy reading, but afterwards I still keep thinking about it and it changes my behavior.

And that's one thing not to be forgotten. Yes, it's true that everyone makes mistakes, and Cracked articles are not always 100% accurate. BUT, in order to write for Cracked, you have to provide a source for every claim you make. All the articles provide links to the studies their claims are based on, so if you doubt the veracity of something, you can go look at it yourself and decide whether the source is viable.

Regardless of whether that site is accurate or not, it has made a big difference in my life reading these articles. Most of what I read makes perfect sense if you just think about it. I went from being a miserably depressed, antisocial loser who hardly ever left my bedroom, to an active, social person with lots of hobbies, who gets plenty of exercise and tries difficult and scary things I never would have before (who only has occasional bouts of depression which are usually fought off fairly quickly), almost entirely as a result of reading these articles and deciding to make some changes. It doesn't even really matter to me if they are completely accurate, because they succeeded in making me a better, happier person.

In other news, my visit to the dentist was far easier than I expected. He said there is no cavity, and the pain I'm feeling is most likely the result of simple sensitivity, which can develop over time. He put some stuff on it to help for a while and gave me the name of a product I can use myself to do the same thing, once this wears off. No drill, no filling, and very cheap! Hooray!