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[IcyTea31]

Found this on the Net:

Weather effects in Finland and rest of the World:
+15°C: Spaniards wear caps, gloves and winter coats. Finns are sunbathing.
+10°C: Frenchmen desperately try to get their central heating on. Finns plant flowers.
+5°C: Italian cars won't start. Finns drive with convertibles.
0°C: Pure water freezes. Water in river Vantaa thinkens a bit.
-5°C: First people are found frozen in California. Finnish midsummer festival ends.
-10°C: Scotsmen turn the heat on in their houses. Finns start to use long-sleeve shirts.
-20°C: Swedes stay indoors. Finns are having last barbeque before winter.
-30°C: Half of the Greek people have frozen to death. Finns start to dry their laundry indoors.
-40°C: Fake Santas are moving to south. Finnish army cancels winter training due to warm weather.
-50°C: Danes are loosing their teeth. Finns rent movies and stay indoors.
-60°C: Polar bears evacuate North Pole. Finnish army starts its winter training.
-70°C: Siberian people are moving to Moscow. Finns are furious since the Koskenkorva can't be stored outdoors anymore.
-273°C: Absolute Zero. Finns admit that it is quite cold outside.
-300°C: Hell freezes over. Finland wins soccer World Cup.

What's the word for a punchline that is simultaneously hilarious and sad because it's true?

[TheBiggerFish]

Reality Is Funny?

[hops]

Observational humor, I think.

And since this is the terrible jokes thread....

What's the deal with airline food?

[TheBiggerFish]

Observational humor, I think.

And since this is the terrible jokes thread....

What's the deal with airline food?

There isn't one.  The prices are sky-high.

[Comrade P.]

-70°C: Siberian people are moving to Moscow.

As a descendant of siberian family whose member moved to Moscow, I take offence to that. My gran moved to Moscow to get finer education, not because it was mildly chilly outside.

[Helgoland]

I'm disappointed that there isn't a panzer joke in there.

[TheBiggerFish]

It would have gone by too fast.

[hector13]

-10°C: Scotsmen turn the heat on in their houses.

Can confirm. Weather here was around 1^oF (don't know what that is in C, I don't like F) the other day, I had to turn the heat on to 68^oF, much to the delight of my partially frozen wife.

[TheBiggerFish]

Snrk.

[hector13]

The thing is, she's a local, she should be used to that. This is only my second Winter in 'murrica!

Then again, I utterly loath Summer...

[My Name is Immaterial]

Man, fuck Kansas.

My cousin's mom passed away when he was little, leaving my uncle to raise a kid all on his own (which he was not at all prepared for). The two argued all the time and when my cousin turned 18, he just took off. Like, fell off the face of the earth for several years. No one knew where he was, we just assume he was wandering around the country.

When he left, my uncle realized that he'd been a shitty parent and started trying to get his life in order. He quit drinking, when to a therapist, and eventually became the person I think he would have been all along if his wife hadn't passed. After a couple years, he met this woman named Carrie. He immediately fell in love with her and the two married about a year after they started dating. I was never really a fan of her, but hey, if she was making him happy, then who am I to judge?

So it's been about six years since my cousin took off, and out of nowhere he calls my uncle. The two meet up and after some heartfelt apologies and manly tears, they hug it out. My cousin, who's been god knows where, moves back in with his dad and new stepmom. Things seemed to be going really well, until she starts acting weird around my my uncle. He feels like something's up, but really wants to make it work.

We were on the phone the other day and he's just distraught so I asked him what happened. Eventually he's telling me that she's been having an affair, and the fucked up part is it's with my cousin. Stunned, I asked him how he found out.

Through the tears he says "I left work early to surprise her, but that's when I walked in the house and saw CARRIE ON MY WAYWARD SONNNNNNNNNNNN"

[Tawa]

you magnificent bastard

[My Name is Immaterial]

Nah, I shamelessly stole it from Imgur. But I am going to use it so much now.

[a1s]

Arthur Nayme, known to his friends as "Chinese" due to being the only Asian in his social circle, disappeared last week.

Today, a murder was committed. The suspect, Joel Stevens, was apprehended on the spot. The victim was kidnapped, tortured, and later had his heart cut out with a spoon. The police took fingerprints and found the victim to be one "Hao Long". The suspect, when questioned, said he didn't know anybody named Hao Long, but refused to state his victim's name.

The head detective, while flipping through the reports on Stevens' friends, found a photo eerily similar to Hao Long's. The name? Arthur Nayme.

I really don't get this one...

[My Name is Immaterial]

Arthur Nayme, known to his friends as "Chinese" due to being the only Asian in his social circle, disappeared last week.

Today, a murder was committed. The suspect, Joel Stevens, was apprehended on the spot. The victim was kidnapped, tortured, and later had his heart cut out with a spoon. The police took fingerprints and found the victim to be one "Hao Long". The suspect, when questioned, said he didn't know anybody named Hao Long, but refused to state his victim's name.

The head detective, while flipping through the reports on Stevens' friends, found a photo eerily similar to Hao Long's. The name? Arthur Nayme.

You might have missed the spoiler then.
I really don't get this one...