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[Aklyon]

it seems making up forms doesn't work in this game world.

imagine how long it must take to mobilise military on a planetary scale.

then again, this is a beaurocratic planet filled with ridiculously long forms, pens, and a form-based economy. Who'd want to invade such an inefficient, awful and torturous place?

The Vogons, of course. They'd probably consider it a challenge to their bureaucracy.

[Aklyon]

it seems making up forms doesn't work in this game world.

imagine how long it must take to mobilise military on a planetary scale.

then again, this is a beaurocratic planet filled with ridiculously long forms, pens, and a form-based economy. Who'd want to invade such an inefficient, awful and torturous place?

The Vogons, of course. They'd probably consider it a challenge to their bureaucracy.

and terrible poetry.

We should obtain a poetry form. We need a comparison.

[USEC_OFFICER]

A standard planet takes between 44.5A and A3.75 periods to mobilize all resources.


The P'ftangen Empire isn't an inefficient, awful and torturous place! It's the greatest Empire in the galaxy, and don't you misprocess it!


What's a Vogon?


You don't need forms to make poetry, remember! I can do it right on this T-102t-1 if I wanted to! Weui, maybe later, once I get some inspiration.

Inventory: Pen (5,337,212,979)
               A36-Air-canister-Fighter
               H1C-Air-canister-Soldier
               Mysterious Package
               Re-breather
               Slip of Paper with '10000000'
Forms: B4742Y-23-V-123-GJ 'Offer of a bribe'
          C34LS-1W
          D9C-11 'Door operation'
          F08D-D1902A-IP 'Improper disposal of food'
          F08D-D1902A-PR 'Disposal of food in proper receptacles'
          M081A3-Z4 'Form for arming Level P3-D Fighters for Order Mobilization 95-S Level B'
          M41L-H5560R-05 'Shipment order for explosive items'
          T-102t-1 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Member'
          T-31At-1 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Member of different pod'
          T-405t-1 'Message from Fighter to Soldier'
          T-420t-2 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Leader'

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The Fighter brochure should be up on the weekend. You guys kinda seem to need it.

[Aklyon]

Do we need it because we've gotten distracted into Vogons, or because we're kinda stuck?

[USEC_OFFICER]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Distracted into Vogons. And if you're stuck, remember that you can still look into the armoury and combat stores in the fighter's quarters. Also, I generally draw things in for a reason. If you're really stuck, try fiddling with everything.

[Aklyon]

See if we can take the landmine out of the box.

[Aklyon]

If you can't be sensible, then try helping me get that mine out of the box. We could blow up the Soldier's Quarter guards with it.

[Aklyon]

If you can't be sensible, then try helping me get that mine out of the box. We could blow up the Soldier's Quarter guards with it.

surely we'd need a form to do that...

Mines are like poetry: Both can be terrible. And since that could possibly rhyme is some language, call the mine a poem and heft it over to the guards.

[Mr. Palau]

If you can't be sensible, then try helping me get that mine out of the box. We could blow up the Soldier's Quarter guards with it.

surely we'd need a form to do that...

Mines are like poetry: Both can be terrible. And since that could possibly rhyme is some language, call the mine a poem and heft it over to the guards.

or call it modern art.

+1

[Dariush]

Examine the long-ass list to the left.
Examine three whatevertheyare to the right.

[USEC_OFFICER]

Three whatevertheyare?


Oh, you're talking about the delivery hatches. The delivery robots use these to move around the ship without impeding the flow of foot traffic. All major rooms, areas and common rooms have a delivery hatch. I'm surprised that you didn't notice them earlier in the file depot or general stores.


Aeui, it's a DB-A Class 2S-3 Sonic Mine! It's infrared sensor is powerful enough to detect all nearby life-forms within a 100 unit radius, even through 10 units of Alloy Y! It's sonic pulses can pass through 100 units of flesh, 20 units of Alloy Y or 10 units of rock without significant damage or dampening, while at the same time being able to liquidify all internal organs within 3D~100 units depending on the intermediate material. It also comes with a Class 12B-4 Timer and a correctly filled-out MI43-23776IN! It's also the cutest of the DB-As. Who's a cute little mine! Yes you are, yes you are!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Aheui, I think it likes me!


Of course I can't just take it out of the 'misfiled' bin without the proper forms. Don't worry though, I'm pretty sure that I could just mail it to my sleeping quarters with the M41L-H5560R-05. Let me just double-check the shipping board first.


Heui... Here it is! M41L-H5560R-05... I can ship all Class 1E-1 to 4E-4 explosives with this. I can also ship activated 1S-1 to 4S-4 or 1C-1 to 4-C4 with this, as long as it's not to a sleeping quarter or common room.


So if I activate the timer on the DB-A Class 2S-4 Sonic Mine, then I can have it shipped to the file depot or general stores or combat stores or armoury and then pick the mine up from there.


Wait...

Inventory: Pen (5,337,212,979)
               A36-Air-canister-Fighter
               H1C-Air-canister-Soldier
               Mysterious Package
               Re-breather
               Slip of Paper with '10000000'
Forms: B4742Y-23-V-123-GJ 'Offer of a bribe'
          C34LS-1W
          D9C-11 'Door operation'
          F08D-D1902A-IP 'Improper disposal of food'
          F08D-D1902A-PR 'Disposal of food in proper receptacles'
          M081A3-Z4 'Form for arming Level P3-D Fighters for Order Mobilization 95-S Level B'
          M41L-H5560R-05 'Shipment order for explosive items'
          T-102t-1 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Member'
          T-31At-1 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Member of different pod'
          T-405t-1 'Message from Fighter to Soldier'
          T-420t-2 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Leader'

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

*I* still hold the view that a planetary (or maybe interplanetary?) bureaucracy would be hell on ear- whatever planet this is.
also, all of that corruption... hang on... they corrupt people with paperwork?

It's not a planet, it's The Seventh Thick Ascending Limb of The First Kidney of the Moon Goddess, which is a Class 3W-CE Frigate LX-2 that operates in the Sector of the Moon Goddess, which is a intentionally underpopulated Sector of the P'ftangen Empire. The nearest P'ftangen planet is several hundred lightyears away, and is actually a nice planet, seeing as it's mainly an agricultural planet. It's surrounding neighbours aren't too lucky however.

As for the corruption part, well, how are they supposed to track it without the bureaucrats filling out forms for it?

[Aklyon]

Darn this frigate and its lack of useful armed-mine delivery locations.
Obtain another form.

[USEC_OFFICER]

Transcription 9A452EA45D2C61
Summary of Communication between PF4-D529 and HA6-37E3

Excuse me, but is there a form that I can get that will allow me to ship a DB-A Class 2S-3 Sonic Mine? PF4-D529

HA6-37E3 Yes, but you don't have the rank to get it.

Oh. Okay. PF4-D529

Inventory: Pen (5,337,212,978)
               A36-Air-canister-Fighter
               H1C-Air-canister-Soldier
               Mysterious Package
               Re-breather
               Slip of Paper with '10000000'
Forms: B4742Y-23-V-123-GJ 'Offer of a bribe'
          C34LS-1W
          D9C-11 'Door operation'
          F08D-D1902A-IP 'Improper disposal of food'
          F08D-D1902A-PR 'Disposal of food in proper receptacles'
          M081A3-Z4 'Form for arming Level P3-D Fighters for Order Mobilization 95-S Level B'
          M41L-H5560R-05 'Shipment order for explosive items'
          T-102t-1 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Member'
          T-31At-1 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Member of different pod'
          T-405t-1 'Message from Fighter to Soldier'
          T-420t-2 'Message from Pod Member to Pod Leader'

[Aklyon]

Go see if our slip of paper is the right slip of paper yet.

[LordSlowpoke]

Assuming the misfiled bin is segregated by the clerk -  Ship the armed mine to the post office, passing by some place you're pretty sure nobody is going to wander through. Proceed to do what Akiyon said.