Chapter 7: The Requiem
Sun Tzu stared down at the hating face of
Vlad the Impaler. Another line from the
Art of War is quoted:
"When your enemy is a bitch, you treat him like one." ((Fun fact: Sun Tzu's book doesn't have much to do with actual tactics. It mainly is filled with social commentary, Sun Tzu's rants on politics and shitty music, and phone numbers to phone sex companies.)) Tzu swings at the Vampire King's neck, (5 vs. 4) slicing into the soft flesh. Tzu's newly acquired Saber didn't give him a decapitation, but now Vlad is stumbling away as his neck pours out a continuous stream of blood.
Meteor Golem swings his molten, rocky arms down upon
Genghis Khan! (2-1 (Agility negative) vs. 6) The agile Khan easily backs up as the Golem pounds the ground. Just as it begins recovering from it's miss, the Golem is attacked by the Mongol! (2 vs. 3) Genghis swings, but his Golden Horde Saber does little more than glance off the Meteor beast.
In the meantime,
Twilight Sparkle sends a massive attack of magic projectiles across the battlefield! (1) However, she overcharges and just sends a bunch of bright light into the sky. She falls down, Exhausted. (-1 to all rolls next turn)
Rainbow Dash pulls a nimbus out of the sky. Pulling it over the Trebuchet, she shakes it around violently until it turns a dark, black color. She bucks it, yelling,
"Enjoy this!" (5 vs. 3) Lightning zips from the cloud and strikes the Trebuchet! The large wooden structure easily catches ablaze. Seeing this, the Seigers all rout from the battlefield.
" 'MERICA!' " Genghis Khan turns to his side to see president
Theodore Roosevelt charging at him. Aiming his Rifle, Roosevelt states,
"I hope you like American lead! Made by China America!" A burst of Rifle ammunition is discharged at the Khan's forehead. (6 vs. 2) The bullets do not pierce the King's forehead armor, but they create heavy dents. Khan falls on a knee, blood oozing from his head.
"AAARGHH! STOP! I FORFEIT!"Genghis Khan has surrendered!RZA stands up from his recent beat-down.
"Well that fuckin' hurts! I can't take anymore of this!" Summoning his dark, Wu-Tang energy, a green aura flies out of his chest and into the chest of the Mongolian Wrestler! (5 vs. 4) A chunk of white light is pulled out of the Wrestler's chest and it evaporates. The Wrestler drops to his knees, panting heavily. (Weakened: -1 to all rolls.)
Lawrence Taylor has a Spear embedded in his back. But that's not enough to stop a Hall of Fame, MVP legend. Taylor does a handstand and swings his weight around, throwing his useless and floppy legs as blunt forces against the body of the Mongolian Spearman! (6 vs. 3) His feet strike against the Spearman's head, throwing him to the ground! The Spearman grasped his head in pain, having gained a Concussion. (-1 to all rolls next turn) Next, Taylor prays to be rescued by the superintendent of the Giants. (1) Instead, a letter floats down from the sky:
The New York Giants has expired it's contract with Lawrence Taylor. Have a nice day.Pinkie Pie looks over the golden muffin in her hand, decorated with nuclear-sign styled icing.
"I am become Pinkie, maker of parties." She throws it down the barrel of the Party Cannon.
Pinkie issues a warning to her teammates. The Party decides to GTFO out of the immediate battlefield, including
Theodore Roosevelt picking his captive
Genghis Khan. The Thermonuclear Muffin majestically sails through the air, before coming down and
*plomp*'ing to the ground.
The ensuing result. (3)
The nuclear blast sweeps everyone off their fight, hurdling them away. The Mongolians barely have timed to scream as they are bombed.
Vlad the Impaler's face implodes, and a split-second later he is turned into a pile of dust.
..........
The Party wakes up from the nuclear blast. Their are no more signs of the Mongols. While everyone is a bit banged up, they are still alive. The Heroes slowly get to their feet, except
Pinkie Pie who leaps up immediately and starts jumping around.
"We did it everypony! Party! Party! Party!...Wait a sec', where are RZA and Lawrence?!" The Party looks everywhere, but the two men seem to have vanished as simply as the Mongols.
And then Pinkie Makes a conclusion.
The Party stays with the NLR military camp for a few days in order to recuperate. On the day of the military procession, the military and The Party are lead on top of a nearby plateau. Everyone stands before a large amount of moon-shaped stones embedded in the ground. Each has a name on it. At the top are two large green and purple stones.
Next to the graveyard is a podium. Captain
Carrot Top stands on it. Clearing her voice, she begins:
"War has never been easy. You all know this. But this number of our fellow soldiers cut down sends a message. What is this war for? Who is too blame? The blame rests on the hooves of one Alicorn. I loved Celestia. If you had told me this would be our fate five years ago, I would have laughed at you. No one knows why she did it, what she is gaining from this. But we will stop her. Equestria, and more, is at stake. And no matter what we will have justice! I now call for a moment of silence to honor our fallen brethren.............Two members of the almighty Party, who brought down the Khan and ended the battle today, perished in the line of battle. If any of the party members would like to commemorate on RZA and Lawrence Taylor, they may now." The orange mare steps away from the microphone stand.
As the Party steps forward to speak, the musicians start to play somber music.....
Twilight Sparkle
Items:
Health: Fine
Rainbow Dash
Items: Katana
Health: Fine
Pinkie Pie
Items: Party Cannon
Health: Fine
Teddy Roosevelt
Items: Rifle, Pistol, Knife
Health: Fine
Sun Tzu
Items: Kaiyun, Ji, Battle Banner, Art of War, Lamellar Armor
Health: Fine
Fluttershy
Items:
Health: Fine
Mongolian Warriors
Equipment: Turkish Sabers, Mongolian Armor
Health: 50/50 Warriors
2 Mongolian Horses
Equipment: Mongolian Horse Armor
Health: Both Fine
Meteor Golem
Equipment:
Health: Fine
Author
Topic: Roll to Dodge Princess Celestia, Act II [Actually Done This Time: R.I.P] (Read 337451 times)