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[Bdthemag]

If by fine you mean we lost the jaw of one team member[and then had his face smashed and cut up.. hes not going to be a looker], and the other team member was blown up and then split in half.

Well, by fine I mean I didn't get hurt.

[Draco18s]

At least no one in the team was made into smoothies and fed to the rest of the team.

</Actually happened>

[Bdthemag]

Played Paranoia with a group of 5 friends today. It was really fun (For me), because they were all waaaay to use to playing DnD. It was fun seeing them realize that their characters will die fast, and I do not care if you are out of the game if you die 6 times.

In the first five minutes, someone got hit by a train. Luckily he had rubbery bones, and he didn't die instantly. He just broke almost every bone in his body. Once everyone was inside the train, the lights suddenly went out. Although everyone attempted to kill each other, they all got crappy rolls so nothing happened. Once they got to the HQ, they realized they had no idea where the briefing room was. So the player with X-Ray vision attempted to try to find the briefing room, he thought he found it but I just made him go the opposite direction. Every player except one followed him, because they assumed he knew where he was going.

That day, four people died for being twenty minutes late to briefing. This game is extremely fun to play with people who haven't played it before, its fun to see the look on their face when they realized they died three times in the first ten minutes.

[KatalDT]

Room for one more? If so, when's the next game?

[Bdthemag]

Well, the current one is pretty full (Considering we have more player's than there are Mandatory Bonus Duties.). I'd consider running a game, but you'd have to put up with a GM who's only GM'ed a game once.

[EuchreJack]

Speaking about other Pen & Paper RPGs, I was once running a Star Wars Roleplaying game (West End Games version, not the Star Wars is DnD In Space version that Wizards released).

Late into the final session of the multi-part campaign, the team needed to roll a certain number with their missile launcher in order to complete the mission.  They rolled once, twice, three times, no luck.  Their missile launcher only had one shot left.

They roll, and the total is just short.

I casually walk over to the player who rolled the dice and changed one of the dice from a low number to a high number.  We all celebrated the victory over the Imperials, and ended the campaign.

Would you recommend the D6 system for people who have a shorter attention span?

A D6 system requires multiple dice and the adding up of the results.  Combat rounds tend to take a while, as a result.  And dealing with the bonus sixes is generally much more fun for the player who rolled the six than for everyone else sitting at the table, waiting for their turn.  But it's still better than D&D, because there are no dice modifiers (in a D6 system, the difficulty number is adjusted instead).

I'd probably recommend playing Paranoia as a player.  In Paranoia, you are blessed if the GM actually allows you to roll the dice!

If you happen to have such a fortunate GM, then you simply roll one dice, and they tell you if you succeed.  If you get bored, you can send the GM a note asking to do something fun.

Even as a GM, the Paranoia system is simple enough so the GM can focus on the player plots instead of the rolls.  It helps that the players are not cleared to know what that system actually is.

Also with Paranoia: If you're the GM, you can just kill everyone when you get bored.   

As a technical matter, smaller groups provide more action for each player.  Although, all games of Paranoia should be played with a minimum of three players, otherwise you always know who killed you.

[HLBeta]

Good thing I read this thread to learn about color clearances before hand, because inside my medkit there were three different colors of pills. I went "Hah, nice try GM!" and picked the Red one. Of course it gave the guy we needed to capture a surge of energy and he tried to escape, but everything ended up fine.

Protip: Next time pocket the red meds and get the guy to self-medicate. Then immediately shoot him for treason. Friend Computer will be impressed.

[Geen]

Holy crap. I AM IN!

[Nilik]

I am in!

Australia.

Which might be an issue with timezones e.t.c. But yeah, Paranoia is ridiculous amounts of fun.

Summary of the best bits of the last game I GMed:

- Team is carrying a box containing a smaller box containing a pizza. They have to deliver it by helicopter. One person's mission is to ensure the pizza arrives intact. One person's mission is to eat the pizza (and report back to his society how it tasted... he was a Romantic).

- Near the start, the equipment guy is medicated for treason. I told the happiness officer "you have any of the pills on this page". The Happiness officer gives him not the normal happiness pills, but the extra-strength highly addictive variety which cause withdrawal symptoms and death if he stops taking them. I decide that his pill addiction carries across between clones, mainly because it was funny. Many perversity points for the happiness officer.

- Equipment guy is injured at some point, and treated by a docbot. Which of course proceeds to remove the affected limb. Equipment guy decides an eye for an eye, and hacks off the docbot's chainsaw arm. He then tells me he wants to try and graft the chainsaw to his own arm. Not a chance, I think to myself, rolling a dice. Its a one! Well... I guess you're now the proud owner of a highly-treasonous new chainsaw arm!

- Once they finally get the helicopter in the air, the happiness officer activates his mutant power, which is to activate everyone ELSES mutant power. This results in the Comms and Recording officer growing an extra arm, as he is a regenerator and already at full health. Fortunately, the only one who is close enough to spot this is the happiness officer, who has been teaming up with the C&R officer since the start, and hacks off the extra arm with a force-sword which he purchased from C-Bay earlier. Perversity points.

- They arrive at the delivery address and find the slot is too small for the box to fit through. They're supposed to open the box, and find the smaller box inside which WILL fit. Obviously they're going to have some difficulty with this as C&R officer's mission is "DO NOT OPEN THE BOX!". While everyone else is arguing, the equipment guy shoves an active grenade into the box. Boom. Turns out he mis-read his mission as being to destroy the pizza. Herp derp.

- C&R Officer loots a laser barrel from Equipment guy's corpse, not realising it is a GREEN laser barrel painted RED.

- After the ensuing gunfight, only the (still working together) Happiness and C&R officers are alive. They also need to get down from the ledge they've found themselves on. Fortunately, they were given experimental parachutes earlier by R&D. One of them works, one doesn't. C&R officer has the highest (but still dismal) equipment maintainence skill, so he volunteers to check them both. He fails both rolls, and identifies the working parachute as faulty, and the faulty parachute as working. They both jump off the ledge and C&R officer is SHOCKED when his parachute doesn't open. Splat.

- Debriefing. Everyone points the finger at the Equipment guy. Equipment guy opens fire to no effect, everyone opens fire back. Including the C&R officer who is using the GREEN laser barrel. Traitor! Everyone opens fire on the traitors, including the (mostly useless so far) team leader who has a cone rifle, the ammo for which is of course unlabelled. Whoops, turns out that was a napalm round! When the dust settles, the C&R officer remains alive, with no witnesses of his treason left alive. The computer congratulates him on salvaging a failed mission (obviously the team leader's fault) by uncovering all those dispicable traitors, and promotes him to ORANGE clearence. Of course his secret society who's mission he just failed (Free Enterpise) would now like to see him in a nearby allyway for their own... "debriefing"....

[Draco18s]

How was the "eat the pizza" secret mission worded anyway?

[Matz05]

I wish I could play this. You guys using Jparanoia? Supposedly it is a modded chat client specificaly for internet Paranoia games.
Never played before, don't own the books, don't know ANYTHING! <ahm, I read some stories like these... OK, a lot!> I said nothing...

[Neonivek]

I tried to get an AFMBE game going online but sadly between my current depression, I am fine now, and flake players, they still suck, I wasn't able to get one going.

I guess I deserved it somehow. Though I am still sad because I wanted to do it sandbox style even if there was a hidden time limit.

I even researched every form of weaponry police officers carry and punched in the stats as well.

I guess I could try Paranoia but my current faith in roleplay is so weak right now...

[Nilik]

How was the "eat the pizza" secret mission worded anyway?

It was along the lines of "The box contains a pre-reckoning artefact known as a 'Pee-za'. We want you to steal it, and bring it back to us for examination. Failing that, try to eat as much of it as you can and report back how it tasted."

It was completely unambiguous; I showed everyone the note afterwards and we had a good laugh, everyone agreed he'd just had a brainfart, including the equipment guy himself. The best part of Paranoia is explaining to everyone what actually happened at the end. "The smoke coming out of the chopper was a smoke grenade someone let off, if you'd failed one more repair check in that elevator you would have all plummeted to your deaths, John was an energy vampire which is why you kept getting injured randomly" e.t.c.

[Neonivek]

How was the "eat the pizza" secret mission worded anyway?

It was along the lines of "The box contains a pre-reckoning artefact known as a 'Pee-za'. We want you to steal it, and bring it back to us for examination. Failing that, try to eat as much of it as you can and report back how it tasted."

It was completely unambiguous; I showed everyone the note afterwards and we had a good laugh, everyone agreed he'd just had a brainfart, including the equipment guy himself. The best part of Paranoia is explaining to everyone what actually happened at the end. "The smoke coming out of the chopper was a smoke grenade someone let off, if you'd failed one more repair check in that elevator you would have all plummeted to your deaths, John was an energy vampire which is why you kept getting injured randomly" e.t.c.

The secret is that the mission is a trap anyway.

Given that your job was either to bring back a pizza, that was in less then perfect condition, or you had to eat it, and die from pizza poisoning.

So you were going to die anyway.

[Draco18s]

My group was once given robot dogs that were there to make us happy and play with us.  I blew mine up (mutant power) which also took out another dog.

Everyone else got cancer from the radiation leaking from the dogs' internal nuclear power source.