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[Liber celi]

For their delicious brain metal.

How can dwarves work a screw pump so fast that it flushes them away?

[RiotShield]

Dwarfs are good at getting... screwed.

Why will dwarfs always wander outside the fortress at the exact moment a siege begins?

[Komra]

For fun. It's hard to see the action of a siege from inside a sealed fortress, after all.

Why don't dwarves have specific mental issues, instead having generic madness, berserking, and depression?

[flame99]

They do. It's just that at that point, they're considered to be "As sane as a dwarf gets".

Why do I never actually get to have a turn on a succession game, and instead always have it die just before my turn rolls around?

[omg_scout]

Because we want you to host a community game now.

Why people are always profaning the game with elvish tilesets instead of playing the only good and dorfy ascii df?

[Spy227X]

Because they can't see that & is a clown and not a

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

DEMON

man.
Well, it is a

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

DEMON

, but Clowns bring fun.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

DEMONS

bring Fun too. So a & is a clown.

[flame99]

Why did Spy227x just spoil the Clowns three times?

[Spy227X]

Why did Spy227x just spoil the Clowns three times?

Didn't you notice the

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

s?

[Graknorke]

Why did Spy227x just spoil the Clowns three times?

Because it isn't a genuine spoiler anymore.

Why do no creatures ever change their hair style or recolour it?

[Komra]

A dwarf in darkness with anything resembling red hair could be mistaken for a goblin. After a number of casualties in this way, most civilizations realized the danger and stopped all hair-dyeing salons.
Luckily, with technology being no greater than 14th century equivalent, only the most noble of nobles were really affected by the loss of this industry. Some later red-dye-based-casualties have been called Unfortunate Accidents.

Why are there so few varieties of polearms in the world?

[wierd]

What are you talking about? I have plenty of pole arms, in a wide variety of shapes and colors.

What, you mean halberds and naginata, and NOT actual arms stuck on vertical spike traps? What are you? CLEARLY you arent very dwarven....

Given that Gnomes dont form a civilization to speak of-- how exactly do they know about alcohol, with sufficient regularity that they would actively seek it out in my stockpile?

[Mr Space Cat]

It's booze; a magical elixir capable of washing away tension and troubles until the next day's hangover.

...and let's face it, it would suck to be a gnome. If I were a gnome I'd drink myself into a dwarf. Booze is probably the only therapy for the little guys' daily woes and self-loathing.

Why do keas steal stuff, and why are they so persistent at it?

[gunpowdertea]

Why do keas steal stuff, and why are they so persistent at it?

'cause it's fun and ticks off the overseer known as "yellow X"... (also Keas really enjoy taking stuff apart in RL, they are curious, intelligent and slightly malignant, like most of us I guess).

Does that mean I am a Keaman, even if I don't have wings? After all, I like taking things apart just to see how they work. I don't steal minecarts full of galena ore, like the DF Keas do, though.

[flame99]

No. In order to truly be considered a Kea, you must A) Be capable of flight B) Take a new expedition's only picks and axes and C) Steal minecarts full of galena ore.

[hops]

How the heck were dwarves able to smelt alumnium when it took us until only a couple of centuries ago to pull it off?