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[Jackrabbit]

Yikes, was a crowbar necessary? I thought that if you subdued the attacker you weren't allowed to do anything to them anymore.

[kaijyuu]

I mean, stealing a TV's pretty bad, but mauling someone with a crowbar when they can't fight back?

[Bdthemag]

Which further proves the point that you should never fuck with MaxiumZero.

[Jackrabbit]

Yeah, I'm not planning to.

[G-Flex]

I promptly snapped his forearm with a roundhouse kick (it's a good thing he got his arms up, too. I was trying to decapitate him,)

Why are people still taking this post seriously even though he claims to have tried to decapitate the man by kicking him? Seriously, this is reading like a Chuck Norris joke.

Yikes, was a crowbar necessary? I thought that if you subdued the attacker you weren't allowed to do anything to them anymore.

Regardless of what you're "allowed" to do, I'd say that beating the hell out of someone with a blunt piece of metal after breaking their arm while trying to kill them, even though they're unable to fight back and the police are on their way, is damn near sociopathic behavior.

But again, the plausibility of that entire post is registering as pretty damn low for me.

[Bdthemag]

Maxium doesn't really seem like the kind of guy who would lie about beating someone up to seem cooler on the internet, just saying.

[Gunner-Chan]

Yet. That's a lot of what he does besides posting passive aggressively about his family.

[Jackrabbit]

Hey, he could have been wearing ice-skates to bed.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

He might have meant he was trying to break his neck, which kicking someone in the head is known to do.

[MaximumZero]

Or, I was just trying to kick him really hard in the side of the head and exaggerating about my intent.

Yet. That's a lot of what he does besides posting passive aggressively about his family.

Don't forget posting fanboyishly about a certain computer company and failing miserably at running forum games. Oh, and getting stuff off my chest that I feel extremely guilty about because no one within physical range will listen to me blather on about anything that's not making them a sandwich and taking care of their dishes. Sorry to have bothered you.

Okay, the three minutes of beatdown were probably a bit of overkill, but the first part with the kick was hilarious.

Thank you. I was attempting to be funny with the imagery, and I'm glad someone caught that.

Can we please get back on topic now?

[Jackrabbit]

It's a bit hard when you suddenly tell everyone you wailed on a disabled dude with a crowbar.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Well, he shouldn't have tried to steal MZ's TV. MZ isn't going to beat you half to death if you don't steal his TV, so don't.

[ToonyMan]

You are the law.  I feel suppressed already.

[Nikov]

Last night I heard something loudly fall in my basement while brushing my teeth at 2AM. My cellar door is definately a weak point to the house and enters under the bathroom, so my first thought was "raccoon" and my second thought was "drunken communist". Hating communists tremendously, I proceeded to put three into the magazine of my M44 and unfold the bayonet, hold a flashlight against the foregrip and sliced the pie down the stairs. I stabbed the vermin's leg off and left him to die.

True story bros.

[Jackrabbit]

Yeah, but the ambiguous way you worded it and the fact that you didn't mention calling the police to deal with the body says "stray dog", not "trespasser".