Punch the !!SKELK!! to death, catch on fire, have a nice drink, walk off to the meeting hall to have a chat with a few friends, go to the dining hall, have a nice dinner, finished making those stone crafts everyone is bitching at him to do, move those crafts down to the depot, put up with the elven ambassador while the covert logging teams are out, make love to his wife (and by that i mean produce a cloud of spores that will impregnate his wife no matter how far the distance), make a nice engraving of an infant being horribly dismembered, butcher that kittens before they can take control of the minds of any dwarves, carve out a giant statue in the name of armok, complete the megaproject of a giant Dwarf to Space Launcher, help raise his children, watch his children grow up to be militia members, watch as they die horribly in the arena/training grounds, cry a great many tears, become addicted to sobriety, have his wife divorce him so that she doesn't have to see him like this, remarry with a hot young dwarf, watch as his new children grow up to be the mayors of the city, question how they magically dissapeared after entering the mayor's office with that drawbridge at the end, be haunted by nightmarish aparitions, join the military, enter the danger room for the remainder of the year, inexplicably sprout a penis, gain a erectile dysfunction that causes constant erections, become a grandmaster misc. object user, enter the arena, fight his way to the title of champion by killing all his foes with his newly sprouted rock hard calloused penis, be given anything he wishes, go off to start a new fortress singlehandedly, carve out the mountain using only his wang into a massive monument to armok that he can live inside, get bored with that, visit the brothels of the world, leave a trail of broken pelvises in his wake, kill all the elves with only his mighty rod, make a giant elf skin blanket, go back to his old fort, use the Dwarf to Space Launcher, Block out the sun with the elf skin blanket, go back to the planet, go back to his armok shrine fort, dig his way to the circus, kill all the clowns except the most powerful, demand that the most powerful give him a lover as glorious as himself, be granted that wish, and keep on screwing that lover for all of time. Doing all of this whilst leaving many piles of Dorf Blood, Melted Dorf, and Dorf... ew... in his wake.
WWUD if he was Uristlicous?