GET THE CONSERVATIVE BASTARD!
You fire at the escaping Seymour...
Liberally! [4] vs [5] ...Yet the shot just barely whizzes past his head.
Use my LIBERAL MARTIAL ARTS training to catch up to Seymour and throw his conservative face into the ground. LIBERALLY! If face isn't available, just get him on the ground somehow.
[5] vs [1] [6+1] You manage to
LIBERALLY TACKLE Seymour hard enough for you and him to fly 20 feet, smacking him facefirst into the side of his limo. Lifting your hand, you
chop him in the back of the head hard enough for his brains to fly out of his eye sockets. Um. Wow. ...Take this 10 Juice and don't kill me.
Sadly, your brain fu was too strong and the bodyguards are all up in your business now.
Somehow convince the Agents that the Hicks are LIBERAL plants that are about to commit LIBERAL VANDALISM against an UPRIGHT CONSERVATIVE citizen.
[4] Strangely enough, it works! Kind of. You convince the Agents that the Hicks are the real
Liberal Crime Squad, and the Agents promptly chase them out. But then they walk up to Jake and begin questioning him. Oh no! At least you get some Juice for your
Liberal PersuasionTalk about conservative stuff. When the hicks come over yell "HELP THE LIBERAL CRIME SQUAD IS ATTACKING"
[4+1] You manage to fool the Agents into thinking you're an
upright Conservative citizen! They nod to you and whistle as they exit the Coffee House. Have some Juice!
Waltz to the crackhouse and look for a gang member.
[6] You prowl the streets around the crackhouse for your prey...And you find a glasses-wearing, inhaler-breathing, scrawny nerd of a Gang Member all by his lonesome. He's waving around a banner that says
Liberals Stink! It's your lucky day!
Buy a pistol
[1] You try to get to the next nearest shop that sells firearms, but instead you trip on the sidewalk and break your balls on the concrete.
Again.
AVENGE THE GLORIOUS MR. BUTT!
[2] vs [6+1] One of the bodyguards tries to step on Aiden, but gets kicked in the stomach for his troubles!
AVENGE THE GLORIOUS MR. BUTT!
[5] vs [2+1] [5] The second bodyguard however, grabs Aiden by the back of the head and smashes his face into the side of the limo. Then jams his elbow into your back for good measure. That looks like it hurt...
Liberal StatusName: Aiden Marcusson
Profession: Judo Sensei
Perk: Martial Arts: +1 to melee chance to hit, +1 melee defense
Location: In a crowd, getting mauled
Juice: 14/1000
Items: $500
Status: Smashed face, aching back
Name: Sayyid Al-Harani
Profession: Programmer
Perk: Computer expert: +1 to using computers.
Location: In a crowd
Juice: 18/1000
Items: $500, Pistol (5/7 shots, 1 extra clip)
Status: Fine
Name: Jake Read
Profession:White Bill Cosby
Perk: Knowing what the jazz is all about: +1 to all socialization rolls.
Location: Desert Eagle Coffee House
Juice: 5/1000
Items: $450, Liberal Pudding Pop
Status: Fine
Name: Kraut
Profession: Mercenary
Perk: Sharpshooter Mercenary : Can buy guns from other Mercs, Liberal or not, +1 to firing at medium or long ranges
Location: Outside the exploded pawn shop.
Juice: 8/1000
Items: $500, 1 Pistol clip, picture of Officer's wife and kids.
Status: Will never have children
Name: John Adams
Profession: Former Elite Liberal Senator.
Perk: Convincing Arguments: Able to freeze conservatives up in Convincing Arguments, similar to a guitar attack, just without the guitar. Additionally, he gets +1 convincing in friendly conditions around other Liberals.
Skills: LIBERAL REVENGE MODE (Can be activated when a Conservative rolls 5 or higher against you!
Location: Crackhouse Streets
Juice: 23/1000
Items: $500
Status: Recoiling from LIBERAL POWER (-1 to all rolls for 2 turns)
Name: Kobrag Innsmouth.
Profession: Slaughterer at an Abattoir
Perk: Cattleman: +1 to knife use.
Location: Desert Eagle Coffee House,
Juice: 10/1000
Items: $480, Black Suit (worn), Knife of Conservative Slaying
Status: Fine
Current Safehouses: Homeless Shelter, Old Cox Paper Mill, Smitty Meat Factory.
Current Vehicles: White 1995 SUV (Outside the Coffee House)