What have I done...?
**********~
Turn 91
**********~META TURN:SPIDERS
GoalsFind the keycard stations.
Current SoundtrackDarknessActionsRW: Get out into the hall. Hack the spiders into another large androidical insect/arachnid. MC defends me while I do this.
(...) You run out into the hall, leap into the mass of spiders, grab one, and hack into it to make yourself a new ally! Unfortunately, you are now surrounded by a swarm of mecha-spiders. They swarm over you!
(...) MC wusses out and hides further down the hallway.
Meta: Throw random lab equipment at the turret with my MIND
(...) The rows of liquid-filled tanks flanking the hallway explode, showering the hallway with glass! The turret is obliterated, and now you're falling at terminal velocity down the hallway AND being followed by several hundred pounds of broken glass.
Meta: Try it again!
(...) You rub the soap further into your eyes! Wait, that's not soap. IT'S HIGHLY CORROSIVE ACID AAAAAAGGGGHHHH! The highly volatile and toxic chemicals seep into your eyes, and you go blind!
RW: Retreat and find more ammo!
(...) You retreat into the lounge and find five baseballs in one of the cabinets!
Meta:Get with the stabbing and slashing already.
(...) You carve a large swathe through the horde of spiders, then pull Derm out of the swarm! They're still coming!
(...) The mecha-spiders continue to advance on you! They just keep coming!Status
Player: dermonster
Name:
Derek L.Occupation: Video game Developer/designer.
Location: Elevator Hallway, Deck M3
Currently: Shaking off mecha-spiders.
Inventory:
Explosive Collar |
Jumpsuit | Splint | Bottle of Painkillers |
Metal Spear |
Keen Helmet | Leather Gloves | Pencil x4 | Guitar |
Coffee Mug |
Marshall Coburn (commanding) |
Micro Mecha Spider (commanding)Wounds:
Heavy BurnsAbilities:
Code Expert |
Neckbeard |
NERD RAEG
Player: Frelock
Name:
Frederick StephonavichOccupation: Actuary (Knowing probabilities of things)
Location: Elevator Hallway, Deck M3
Currently: Slashing spiders.
Inventory:
Explosive Collar |
Jumpsuit |
Laser Dagger |
Cheetah ArmWounds:
Missing ArmAbilities:
Uncanny Prediction |
Actuary's Lament |
Tweak the Odds
Player: monk12
Name:
MonkOccupation: Troper
Description: Characteristically wears nice hats. Top hats, pirate hats, fedoras, you name it. Hopefully still has one in his possession.
Location: Engineering Lab, Deck M3
Currently: -UUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
Inventory:
Moist Top Hat |
Explosive Collar |
Jumpsuit |
Plasma Rifle |
Balloon AnimalWounds:
Broken RibAbilities:
Applied Phlebotinum |
TV Tropes Will Ruin Your Life |
MacGyvering |
Telekinesis |
Pyrokinesis
Player: HighEndNoob
Name:
Kyle HammersOccupation: Janitor
Location: Elevator Hallway, Deck M3
Currently: Fulfilling his tropes.
Inventory:
Explosive Collar |
Jumpsuit |
Mop | Rubber Gloves |
Medkit |
Power Cleaner | Wheelchair |
Burlap Sack |
Spray Can |
Gas Mask | Bucket
Wounds:
Missing Legs | Dual Head Bumps |
BlindAbilities:
That's The Power of Pinesol, Bitch! |
Clean Freak |
Custodial Might |
EMT |
Digitigrade Legs | Telepathy
Player: _DivideByZero_
Name:
John FreemanOccupation: Drill Sergeant
Location: Lower Left Lounge, Living Quarters, Deck M3
Currently: Storing his new ammo.
Inventory:
Explosive Collar |
1/2 Jumpsuit |
Turban |
Unicorn Band-aids | Glass Shard | Fake Ammo Belts |
Caruso Shades |
Cheetah Arm |
Spacesuit |
Arm Cannon | Baseball x5
Wounds:
Missing Arm |
Heavy BleedingAbilities:
Major Payne |
Fullmetal Jacket |
Apocalypse Now
Name: Marshall Coburn MkII Combat Droid
Description:
A giant mechanical spider made of smaller mechanical spider parts. It was fitted with an advanced AI routine and can now talk. It also has a self-powered eye-laser taken from the remains of Xenocalamus. Inventory: None
Wounds: None
Abilities:
Eye Laser |
Web Shooter
Group AttacksImpromptu SingalongSpur of Conflagration to Giga LazorLocations
The S.S. Periclase
Main Deck
Deck 2
Maintenance Deck 3, Main Elevator
Maintenance Deck 3, Living Quarters
EARTH!
Elevator Controls
Interrogation Room 7E-365 (Deck M3): You were all shackled to chairs in here when you woke up. The door has been dropkicked off its hinges. There's circuitry on the walls, a row of monitors, and a row of 5 chairs.
FANTASY TURN:What's that thing in the sky...
Goals"KIDNAP THE MAYOR OF THIS TOWN AND ESCAPE" Complete!Throw Ogomspoxom into the fires of Mt. Helmath! Complete!Current SoundtrackCartesian WarfareActionsFW: Search for a magical artifact of great power. Stuff gold/jewels/Important looking items into a pocket dimension while I'm at it.
George: Get up. Get UP damn you! Look within yourself, this has been your first taste of battle. You will not fall here! YOU WILL NOT! NOT THEN, NOT NOW, AND NOT EVER! Bear your wound with pride and return it tenfold! YOU ARE GEORGE! THE PRIME EXAMPLE OF YOUR RACE! FOR HONOR, FOR GLORY, FOR DERM, AND FOR RAAAAAAT KIIIIIINNND!
(...) The only portable dimension you have access to is a portal to the life plane, so you toss a ton of gold and jewels in there. Then, you see it. At the back of the room you see a pedestal, flanked by blood-red curtains. Atop the pedestal...
a book. A feeling of dread envelops you as you lift the book from its resting place. As you do so, a tattered paper slips from between the pages and floats gently to the floor. You pick it up from the cold stone floor and look at it. It's blank... but it feels important. An energy you can't quite understand surrounds it. You decide to take it with you.
But that still leaves the book. You feel a chill run down your spine as an unnameable evil whispers to your mind. The book calls to you. But you shouldn't take it...
(...) George weakly flails around in a vain attempt to bite the agent. He twists the spear in the wound!
Fantasy: Run back to the top of the tower!
(...) You run back to the tower and hop back in through the second floor window!
Fantasy: Shoot at the flying ship in dismay.
(...) You fire a shot at the approaching ship, but it simply bounces off. Now you're even more depressed.
FW: Quick! Grow prehensile sideburns!
(...) Your sideburns shrivel and die. Concentrate, or your Dorfy powers will fade!
Fantasy: Learn how to levitate.
(...) No dice.
The flying ship soars over the fortress gates, and a group of glowing figures jump down from the deck!
"Your time's up, Passedrims!"
"You're too late. Your eradication has already begun."
Status
Player: dermonster
Name:
Derm Hell-binderOccupation: Elemental Mage/Summoner.
Location: Treasure Room, Gobbo Tower
Currently: ...
Inventory:
Robes | Spiffy Hat | Keyring |
George (commanding) |
Chattering Fangs (commanding) |
Sword |
Armor |
Blank ParchmentWounds:
Heavy BurnsAbilities:
Gift of the Magi (...) |
Squishy Wizard |
Summoner (...) |
Water Blast |
Superheat |
Tectonic Shift |
Lightning Rod
Player: Frelock
Name:
Frelock Von-HeisenbergOccupation: Luck-o-mancer (Manipulating probabilities of things)
Location: Fortress Gates
Currently: Rolling around.
Inventory:
Gold Coin |
Peasant Robes | Golden Pocket Watch |
Map of Westport |
Long Sword |
Armor |
Spring Shoes |
Elica Larifera (commanding)Wounds:
Heavy Bleeding x3 |
Missing Leg x2 |
Black Eye |
FaintAbilities:
Accident Waiting to Happen |
Befuddlement |
Legsplosion |
Greater Legsplosion
Player: monk12
Name:
EdgarOccupation: Sky Pirate
Location: Second Floor, Gobbo Tower
Currently: Hiding.
Inventory:
Sleeveless Long Coat |
Grappling Hook |
Harpoon Gun | Bloody Arrow |
Case of BoozeWounds:
Right Forearm Missing |
Left Arm Missing |
Very Heavy Bleeding |
FaintAbilities:
Booze Power (...) |
Terraphobia |
Side-quest Radar
Player: HighEndNoob
Name:
HighEndNoobOccupation: Ninja Sniper
Location: Fortress Gates
Currently:
Inventory: Robe |
Throwing Dagger x18 | Musket | Musket Ammo x18 |
Sword |
Tattered Shirt |
Leaf BarrelWounds:
Missing ToothAbilities:
Immaculate Aim |
Clumsy Fighter |
'Splode On Impact
Player: _DivideByZero_
Name:
Urist AnvilsmasherOccupation: Soapmaker
DescriptionLocation: Fortress Gates
Currently: Slightly less Dorfy.
Inventory: Cave Spider Silk Robe | Cave Spider Silk Shoes x2 | Bar of Kitten Tallow Soap |
Battle Axe |
Bamboo Pegarm |
Stone Arm |
Ozurlidod |
≡Silver Warhammer≡ |
Legchucks | Rat Bone Splint
Wounds:
Missing Arm x2 |
Broken Toe |
Heavy Bleeding x2Abilities:
Dabbling Surgeon (...) |
Meager Social Ability |
Martial Trance (...) |
Prehensile Beard
Name: George
Description:
A 1.5-foot-tall rat with a scorpion stinger, gills and fins! He takes orders from Derm.Inventory: None
Wounds:
Heavy BleedingAbilities:
Amphibious
Locations
Ashiorid
Hellfire Cove
The BorealisCondition:
Sunk
Westport
Mayor's Ogomspoxom's Former Manor
Forest Retreat
Nolsmustul, Goblin Fortress
Author
Topic: Roll To Roll To Dodge: A Meta-Adventure [Turn 126: Booze Mist Rising] (Read 302659 times)