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[Kagus]

Speaking of food, I had a friend over for dinner last night and she commented that the side salad "tasted fancy", so she wondered what I'd put on it.

...literally just olive oil and balsamic vinegar (the cheap kind). Then again, this same person had to google what a stir-fry was when I was making one, so she'd have some idea of what to expect. Hasn't been exposed to a lot of different food culture.

[hector13]

Was just reading through Neil Morrisey’s filmography, came across a film called “I Bought a Vampire Motorcycle”.

From the plot summary:

Noddy and Kim get Chinese food. When Kim orders garlic prawns, the bike drives off with her. It takes her under a bridge, throws her off, and makes advances at her. When it notices a crucifix around her neck, the bike drives back to the pub…

and from a reviewer:

”…there is no justification for including the scene in which the bike pursues a high heeled prostitute down a dark alley.”

[King Zultan]

I have looked into this movie and now I feel like I need to watch it.

Also apparently there's a scene with a talking turd for some reason.

[Loud Whispers]

Was just reading through Neil Morrisey’s filmography, came across a film called “I Bought a Vampire Motorcycle”.

From the plot summary:

Noddy and Kim get Chinese food. When Kim orders garlic prawns, the bike drives off with her. It takes her under a bridge, throws her off, and makes advances at her. When it notices a crucifix around her neck, the bike drives back to the pub…

and from a reviewer:

”…there is no justification for including the scene in which the bike pursues a high heeled prostitute down a dark alley.”

Reminds me of this one isekai where a bunch of delinquets get isekai'd into a Dragon's Quest-esque fantasy world. At one point the gang have to deal with a succubus but one by one, they can't attack her because she appears to them as their most attractive ideal mate. One of the gangsters is only cares about motorcycles and driving real fast. They all turn to him telling him he is their last hope and he replies "it's no use, I'm already imagining her as a motorbike"

[pisskop]

'pounded in the butt by the vampire motorcycle bike' and its sequel 'pounded in the exhaust by 7 garlic prawn shrimp from from Best Wong on 3rd, open Saturdays until midnight!'

[Frumple]

had to check to see if that actually existed

somewhat disappointed they do not appear to

... that said, searching amazon for vampire motor bike books pulls up a remarkable amount of smut. It's, like. 1/41/10th kids books and 3/49/10ths vampire smut. Hell of a thing.

e: actually went to page two of the amazon search results, observed ratios adjusted

[Grim Portent]

had to check to see if that actually existed

somewhat disappointed they do not appear to

Send an email to Tingle asking for it and I'm sure he will provide.

Or he'll write a book called 'Pounded in the butt by my email asking for a book about being pounded in the butt by vampire motorcycles,' which is the next best thing.

[nenjin]

"My Vampiric Email Romance." Somewhat catchier.

I had to go look at some of these titles too.

"Motocross Save My Life: From Its Darkness."

Grammatically that title annoys me. Did Motocross save you from its own Darkness? Did it save you from the Darkness of your life? Why is it "Its" Darkness instead of "My" Darkness. Why is there a colon there?

I suppose its like asking trash to smell better.

[pisskop]

When Im in the mood, this trash tier pulp is great for a lark

[Loud Whispers]

Drained of my life by my sexy vampire life insurance salesman

Appreciative of my seductive vampire recyclable waste collection operator who recycles me because my life is a reusable waste

Fucked over by my hot vampire politician who drinks blood not because he's a vampire but because he's a politician (also we're in an open relationship because he fucks the entire public over for generations because he's hot, incompetent yet overconfident and won't step down from office until a thousand years of darkness have passed, making him the youngest politician in senate)

[McTraveller]

I’m reminded of those classic youth books in the Bunnicula series. Could probably re-imagine that with “adult” content.

Sorry I have now tainted all your memories, heh.

[Eric Blank]

I'm sorry to whoever had to imagine sexualizing a vampire bunny, but I had no idea what that was and now I'm trying to imagine a bunny trying to seduce a woman

[pisskop]

Oh yeah, I remember bunnicula, very vaguely.  He sucked a carrot white

P:  https://www.imdb.com/title/tt5444412/

There was a tv show???!  I remember a book

[nenjin]

Yeah but who remembers Duckula?

[Ganondworf]

Yeah but who remembers Duckula?

I do, now that you ask. But I didn't think of it for the last 25 years or so. WTF