So for the last couple of weeks, there's been this company meeting planned. Strategic meeting, big company issues, margaritas to be served, ect...I was kinda looking forward to kicking back, drinking on the clock and talking about how things need to move forward.
And instead I was stuck with a customer with a GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING ODBC 3.51 CONNECTOR THAT WILL NOT FUCKING DELETE. It'd been another upgrade I was dreading and somehow, it all went as planned. Except this part. That signaled it would be a problem right as the upgrade started. So I'm pouring through Google searches to figure out the issue, trying them, none are working. Phone starts ringing. Random people asking me about shit no one gave me heads up on. Guy who is confused how to run a report and then when I run it the right way, starts to argue with me it's broke because he doesn't see the data expects. Turns out his guys aren't even entering the data. Meanwhile the entire company is upstairs, where I'd like to be.
So I finally say fuck it, and head up stairs (the 2nd or 3rd time I'd attempted to do so.) As usual the junior developer is tacitly being called out by the lead developer. I'm already angry as fuck, irrationally so I realize. And then the discussion about when to have these meetings comes up and everyone is like "Oh the mornings."
IE the times support generally is the busiest because of some fucking fire someone started the night before. I very reasonably say "There's no way I'll make those meetings."
And my boss goes "Well, there's no reason for all of support to be up here."
And I ask "Well, do you want input or not?"
And he says "Yes. But there's no reason for all of you to be up here."
And so I say "Are we going to choose a tech support lead (a role no one has been willing or able to fill since before I started there) then to collect issues and disseminate information? And he says "Yeah, we should have a meeting about that."
Remind you, were a company of less than 20 people. This isn't some mammoth organization that requires meetings, team leads for a team of 2.5 and what not. Meetings are often a convenient way to delay a decision at my company, and just spawn more meetings when they do happen.
And that's not really even the point. The point is, bottom bitches at our company, i.e., me and the other tech support guy, get almost no consideration for our opinions when it comes to the bigger picture. We're there to do the grunt work, hop when someone snaps their fingers, hop when the phone rings, act as the advocate for the customer and generally give of our time and energy (like everyone) while having the least weight attached to our opinions. Or, indeed, our presence, unless it involves learning something so the whole company doesn't look stupid in front of customers or to fill in the timeline of a disaster. We're also paid the lowest (in a company not famous for paying high wages.)
And it's kinda like.....I just got done sweating over a customer upgrade that was so fucked up from the way things used to be done, and getting slammed out of nowhere with phone calls at 4pm on a Monday.....and my presence isn't really necessary? Like I'm not a vital goddamn part of your fucking business where it is my job to apologize for it half the time?
But I guess when it comes to "strategic" matters, our input isn't valuable, nor our wishes. It's not even that I disagree with him that we all need to be part of it. It was the combination of the high stress and clean up this job requires, and basically being dismissed in the same half hour period by my boss in my supposedly flat company. Shit, whenever anyone says that no one cares about how the business is doing or what it's doing, I'm the first to say "I care! I want to know!" And then for the guy who fucking complains that no one cares, to tell me that I or anyone doesn't need to be there for it?
Fuck that. I like my boss as a person, but I'm coming to loathe his management style. This is after last week I watched him and another developer go head to head and get personal over where to put some fucking bullshit in the UI. Here's a hint boss: don't shit on the people whose backs your company is built on. There aren't enough people here for you to stare over my head while you do that, and all the booze and events will not salve people's anger when it's "game time" and you're being Mr. Assertive in meetings and being an asshole
I mean I don't even bring that much to meetings, technical or otherwise. I'm self-aware enough to know that. But considering 40% of the people there are wall flowers unless directly engaged, how much fucking benefit do they bring? For a company that was pitched to me as supposedly being flat, being treated like a grunt not only stings, it infuriates. Maybe I should just take my cue from another friend who works there, and stop attending all non-mandatory meetings. Of course, giving a shit is the only thing that makes the job doable for me. So that's not a road I want to start down, because I'm bitter enough as it is.