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[Dwarfaholic]

Round 49:

Round Complete.

Tarran: Move [1]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 2

In his Rush to Walk Backwards through the doorway, Flagrarus Knocks You Aside.

Mental Damage Roll: 3

Mental Health 9/12. These young kids, they ain't got no respect for us old-timers.
Get off my lawn! you Mutter Silently.

Ragnarok97071:  Enhance Object:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 6

You Grab The Blade with Both Hands and Squeeze Tightly. Oddly, The Edge does not bite into your flesh. You Furrow Your Brow and Focus, focus Like you've Never Before. You can... Feel... the blade now, in your mind.

There has got to be a way to make it sharper,
more powerful,
more Deadly.

You Pour Your Soul into The Sword. The Air Warps Around You to Demonstrate the Magnitude of The Event.

You Sweat, You Struggle. Excruciatingly Dramatic Background Music Builds Up Until...



Slowly, a Pale Light Emerges From Within The Blade. A Relieved Melody plays. You Open Your Eyes.

Swish.

You Cut Off The Legs of The Rack next to you. The Armaments Fall, most of them getting Accidentally Discharged In The Process.

Swish, swish.

You Stand.

The Fragments Of Bullet fall around you, each Cut Cleanly through the mid. You Take Out a Pair Of Sunglasses and Wear Them.

Item Acquired!
Sunglasses: Worn: Head. Style +3, Anonymity +2. [4/4].

Inteuniso: Interact:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 5

Pray tell, what are you fine gentlemen waiting for?

The Leader's Look Goes Blank.

You Wait.

Eventually, A Response Is Received.

We wait for buureaacy craacy to auuthorize killing you. Must wait for paperwork, boss always says.

What about the whole shaking your weapons and stuff?

Another Pause.

Oh, that. We were just making you scared.

The Brutes Laugh.

But seriously, once we get the approval form back, you are dead.

The Brutes Surround You.

So, uh... how can I help you?

You could help us get approval on form.... urgh... XE-170?

The Brutes Converse Amongst Themselves.

Yeah, it was that one. RT-380, just like I said.

Flagrarus: Move [1]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 4

You Move Through The Doorway with Such Speed that you Knock Tarran Away.

He Grumbles Loudly about Some Sort Of Prawn.

Kagus: Lunatic Action:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 3

You Sing Horribly. Luckily you are So Insane you Cannot Comprehend your own singing.

The Groovesprites Groan In Pain.

One Of The Groovesprites Perishes.

Acanthus117 II: No Action [2]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: AUTOSUCCESS

Beware, Operative.

You are Near The Edge.

[Dwarfaholic]

^Round Complete.

[Tarran]

Go through the door that Euphemism cut open. Cuss at Flagrarus if I see him.

[inteuniso]

Obviously the nicest thing to do would be to HELP THE BRUTES.

It would be mean, otherwise.

[ragnarok97071]

Exit Armory. Get Door.

[Flagrarus]

Receive Gameswitch lessons from Euphemism or one of the other Athenians.

I...did get it back, right?

[Dwarfaholic]

Round 50:

Round Complete.

Tarran: Move [1]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 1

Your Face Grimaces as you Step On A Pointy Rock. Well, if by Step you mean Smash Your Head and by Rock you mean Door.
It ambushed you! It's a communist!
Not your fault!

Physical Damage Roll: 5
Mental Damage Roll: 4

Physical Health 7/12. Mental Health 5/12. You Fight Back The Tears. Tears of Rage, and tears of Shame.

Achievement Unlocked! "Half A Century"
Somehow survive for 50 turns. Yeah, as if that'll happen to anyone.

Inteuniso: Assist NPC:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 1

A Brute Arrives with The Paperwork.
You Immediatel Volunteer to Assist. The Brutes, all Functionally Illiterate, are Relieved to Let You Do Their Work.

All right, then... let's see...
Name... name of target...

You Chew Your Pencil thoughtfully, before scribbling in some random letters. You'll fill it out later.

Purpose of attack...
to kill? I'll put 'other.'

You Continue On until The Paper Is Filled. At that point you notice You've Been Writing Upside Down.

The brutes groan in annoyance.

Another Brute is Sent Off to retrieve more papers.

Ragnarok97071: Move [1]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 4

You Walk Back into The Lounge.
It looks pretty much like before, actually.
Actually actually, hold that thought.

There's a Corpse on the ground.
Looks like the poor bugger Forgot To Breathe.

Flagrarus: Gain Instruction:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: AUTOSUCCESS [AI Teaching Roll: 7]

So, uh, Euphemism, can I get my Gameswitch back now?

What? Oh, yes, sure, Operative.

The Athenian Leader hands back The Gameswitch.

You Venture A Request. Euphemism, I'm afraid I have no idea how to use this thing.

You don't know how to use you Gameswitch?
Of course, I forget. You are not taught anything. Well, then, allow me to explain...

Kagus: Lunatic Action:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 6

Physical Health 8/8. Mental Health 8/8.

The Death of One Of The Groovesprites seems to have Shaken You Back to your senses. You Are Back In The Game.

Achievement Unlocked! "Achievement Blocked!"
Have someone else get an achievement on the same turn you would get it.

Acanthus117 II: No Action [3]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: ;_;

You Perish as you Forget To Breathe.

On The Gameswitches And Game Theory:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Right, then. So here's how it works.
There are eight Gameswitches we know of. Four of them control the four Regions; the Earth, the Moon, the Labyrinth, and the Dreamlands. The other four have universal controls. The first switch is the Earth switch. It also has some universal controls. The one you're still missing is, I think, Volume, although I'm not too sure on that. You can mess with the tech and magic levels of the Earth, and on how much swearing is permitted on Earth.
Additionally, each Gameswitch has an additional, physical characteristic. Switch #6, I recall, had some sort of time-distorting effects, if I remember correctly. In this case, switch #1 has a blade on it that cuts through anything and everything with absolutely no resistance whatsoever. That's what we used to cut open the doors. With enough training and focus you can even cut through air, or the fabric of space and time itself. It's quite difficult, though.
What else...?

Ah, yes. All Gameswitches are totally indestructible. Completely. If you throw a nuke on it, nothing. Lasers, nothing. They don't even heat up or cool down; they always feel a pleasantly neutral temperature to the user. If you drop a switch in a black hole, it'll just wait there until the hole vaporizes, and then continues on as if nothing happened.

The switches are usually lost for thousands of years, until the end of another game approaches. Then, once suitable protagonists arrive, they just start appearing, quite a lot like other significant artifacts, like the objects Alpha through Omega.

What, about 'the end of another game?'
Yes, you wouldn't know about Game Theory, either, would you?

Okay, the idea is that this world is some sort of game, played from the outside by some sort of force. Some suggest it is another of the Coward's dreams, but that's all metaphysics. Once every arbitrary length of time two diametrically opposed nations of about equal strength arise. They fight on for about a thousand years or so, usually changing names and ideologies in the process. After some fighting has happened, a group of extremely notable individuals arises, or is cultivated, or just pops out of a hole somewhere. They can be called Protagonists, Operatives, Emissaries, or whatever. What is unusual about them is two things:
1. They do not know almost anything about the world. Not the laws, the culture, who they are fighting for, or even why. They have a deep connection with one another, though.
2.  Luck. They have incredible luck. Good luck, bad luck, mediocre luck, whatever. They always find the switches, and the objects, and allies from unlikely places, and doors no-one else could see. They are unstoppable in their curiosity.
Those would be you, right?

So, once these protagonists manage their objective, there is a lot of turmoil, an apocalypse of some scale, and it all starts over again. And that's how it's been going on since as long as we have records, which date back to several games ago.


Euphemism Coughs.

Well, that was an unusually long speech from me. You'd think I was delivering a well thought-out lecture there, from the way I spoke!
Ha.

Ha.

[ragnarok97071]

Yay, Turn! Also, Is the sword #6? It does have time distortion.

[Kagus]

I'll need to set the groovemaster on autopilot.  I won't be able to enter in commands on a regular basis in the foreseeable future.

[Dwarfaholic]

^Round Complete.

[ragnarok97071]

Take any equipment on the corpse, pick up the door.

[Tarran]

Search for the Beta Object. Surely nothing bad can happen from that.

[Rexfelum]

An NPC explains the plot.

Land sakes, this game has a plot now!

--Rexfelum

[inteuniso]

So... by failing, I survive?

Damn my failing!
Request stamps to fill out these forms.

[Dwarfaholic]

Happy New Year, gentlemen.

Also, Bonus Round:

DF Arena Mode Fight To The Death.

All Current Players and their NPC Allies are thrown into a Roughly Circular Arena-Like Structure. Dying here Will Not Kill Your Character. All the Kills you manage to get, however, will be Transferred To You at The End Of The Bonus Round.

Disclaimer: There will, of course, be some Issues. For instance, my Unmodded DF does not Contain any Immediately Obvious Replacements for, say a Ghastly, and my Moltres is, sadly, a Dragon. Also, there were some Errors in the Execution of the Round, and these will be Pointed Out where relevant.

Perhaps if I do this A Second Time I will consider Modding Out More Fitting Fighters. But meeeeeeh.