MWAHAHA! MWAHAHAHAHAA! MWAHAHA MWAHAHA MWAHAHAHAHAAAA!
OK, so there wasn't anything so bad happening this turn. I was just thinking of how enjoyable it will be once you finally reach the fourth room <3Frederick VII:
Cower in a corner, wishing I hadn't held off on getting over my severe arachnophobia.
6
Lord Teanscones Fordinner, Earl of York:
I order the spiders to run away from my awesome self, and if they don't I'll unleash a can of divine whoopass on them.
6
Spider: 4
Great Bambini:
Tell familiar to burn spiders, summon a bagel big enough to crush each spider just over each spider.
2-1=1, Familiar: 4
Hans-Hans The Truculent:
run out of the tunnel and kill spiders that are on me.
6
Survival: 3
Spider: 2
Ivanor Denisovich:
Eat the spiders, and have my body suck the poison out and store it in my eyes so I can shoot it out later, like a toad.
3
Spider: 5
Alessandro 'Di Antony:
Challenge the swarm of spiders to a duel and then rapier them all!
5
Spider: 1
Mr. Erich the Interesting:
Move position on ALLEGIANCE MESH towards spiders. Extract HUMAN TEARS from a group member to summon the SPIDER KING.
2
Spider: 4
Lowpolygon Blownaparte: X
Instead I make a tactical retreat and try to shoot out mini-hadokens from my fingers. All ten of them, in rapid sequence. Like a hadoken minigun.
4-1=3
Alfie:
I pick up the sword and practice pyromancy.
2
Kin the Scribe: X
1. I examine the Arrow of Explosive Dearth with the intension to see if I can replicate it if I ever come across non-magical arrows.
2. If possible I will also shoot an Arrow of Explosive Death aiming in the center of the spider carpet. I of course do this when I can do it with the least ally collateral.
1
As he suspected, Alfie is completely unable to pick up the huge sword despite his best efforts. It's still silent, too.
In the meanwhile, the Great Bambini starts thinking about crushing those spiders with bagels. Two birds with one stone! He tells his familiar to start burning the spiders and then concentrates. Bagels. Qucikyl runs towards the spiders. Bagels. He's focusing... Bagel. Some of the spiders burst into flame Baaagel. The burning spiders run off from the group, as if they didn't want to set the other ones on fire. Mmmm, bagels.... Bob manages to summon one and starts eating it, completely forgetting about the spiders.
At the entrance to the other room, several things are happening at once. King Frederick staggers away before fainting from fear; Hans-Hans runs out of the corridor in a rage, then stops, drops and rolls over several spiders and out of the swarm. He's starting to feel slightly dizzy, and got another bite as well, but it's nothing serious yet.
Ivanor grabs one of the spiders and eats it in two quick bites. OM NOM NOM. The poison won't affect him since it's just going through his digestive tract, but his crazy idea of spitting poison out of his eyes is completely unfounded.
Lowpolygon decides to try to use smaller hadokens rather than big ones, thinking he can fire them off faster. While he certainly can fire them off faster, it seems the power-size ratio is exponential instead of being linear, so he needs several direct hits to kill even a single spider.
Mr. Erich mumbles something about allegiance meshes and summoning the spider king, but nobody seems to want to give him any tears. Boys aren't supposed to cry, after all.
About the only ones to be actually useful are Lord Teanscones Fordinner, and surprisingly, Alessandro 'Di Antony. Alessandro skewers dozens of spiders like he's making shish kebab, although in his fury he forgets to defend himself and acquires two new bites on his legs.
Lord Teanscones thunders at the spiders, telling them to leave of face the divine wrath of god. Somehow, this actually works, not just on the spiders but also on the nearby people.
Then Kin ruins everything, when he tries to shoot an arrow of Explosive Death at the spiders, but accidentally launches his arrow of Explosive Dearth instead. A few of the spiders keel over, but the others resume their attack with even greater vigor.
In case you want to know, a dearth is a lack of food. Those spiders are now ravenous, hungry hungry spiders. That's twice as bad as hungry hungry hippos.
Condition:
Unconscious(-2 to most actions, failguard)
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Suit of Chainmail(statistical bonus)
Bent Warhammer(2H Weapon, ignores up to -2 of damage negation by armor, -1 to hit)
Skills:
Severe Arachnophobia
Condition:
Bruised
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Field Plate(-1 to damage received)
Claymore(2H Weapon, +1 to damage dealt)
Skills:
Novice Swordsman(statistical bonus)
Commander(significant statistical bonus)
Divine Authority(makes everyone around him want to do as he says. This is a resistable effect)
Fading pain(statistical malus)
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Mostly Eaten Bagel
Magical Armour(-1 to damage received, annoyingly British)
Skills:
Summoner(significant statistical bonus)
Novice Blood Mage(statistical bonus)
Attention Defi-Ooh, shiny!
Familiar: Qucikyl the Imp
Condition: Normal
Inventory: None
Skills: Hellpower(fire generation and various other effects), Regeneration(regenerates non-lethal injuries easily)
Condition:
Poisoned(roll for illness each turn)
Slightly Ill(statistical malus)
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Katana(1H Weapon, statistical bonus)
Composite Armor(statistical bonus)
Skills:
Novice Mugger(statistical bonus)
Novice Dodger(statistical bonus)
Stomper(significant statistical bonus)
Condition:
Normal
Inventory:
Cheese-stained Wifebeater
Rough Jeans
Tattered Baseball Cap
Billy Club(statistical bonus)
Skills:
Novice Slapper(statistical bonus)
Novice Gourmet(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Poisoned(roll for illness each turn)
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Leather Armor(+1 to dodge)
Rapier(1H Weapon, statistical bonus)
Great Headdress(statistical bonus/malus, depending on the situation)
Skills:
Incompetent Poet(statistical malus)
Novice Swordfighter(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Normal
Inventory:
Beige Business Suit
Swordcane(1H Weapon)
Navy Blue Cape
Skills:
Novice Searcher(statistical bonus)
Novice Personnel Manager(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Bruised
Chipped Teeth
Bandaged cut on left calf
Pain(-1 to physical actions)
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Skills:
Competent Martial Artist(+1 to rolls involving skills)
Moveset: Hadoken, Shinkuu Hadoken, Mini Hadoken
Novice Healer(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Normal
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Skills:
Summoner(statistical bonus)
Novice Geometrymancer(statistical bonus)
Novice Geomancer(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Fused little-ring fingers.
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Shortbow(2H Ranged Weapon)
Quiver(12 Arrows of Explosive Death)
Leather Armor(+1 to dodge)
Green Cloak
Skills:
Novice Runecrafter(statistical bonus)
Novice Archer(statistical bonus)
SC Regeneration(activate to cannibalize one part of your body to heal another)
Author
Topic: Mad Wizard's Arena: An Update?! (Read 11607 times)