Hey, hey, hey! I have a completely legitimate excuse! I was playing at a concert! I didn't have any time until now to finish up the turn. Which is here, by the way, if you'd just waited a bit you wouldn't have done something stupid like that.
But don't worry, I'm not angry at all, even if I sound like I do <3Frederick VII:
After admiring my purple noble clothes specially designed to not be cumbersome, I smash some cobblestones with my mighty warhammer of mightyness.
1
Lord Teanscones Fordinner, Earl of York:
I ready myself for whatever it is that the floor is counting down to.
6, Dodge: 6, Damage: 4-1=3
Great Bambini:
Meditate Bob does. hmm.
3-1=2
Hans-Hans The Truculent:
focus on my surroundings, ready to strike down whatever or whoever may attack me.
6, Dodge: 1, Damage: 1
Ivanor Denisovich:
Practice my bitch-slap while shouting "MAKE ME A SANDWICH, WOMAN!"
3
Alessandro 'Di Antony:
Prepare to dodge what is next - but look far more heroic than anybody else while doing it.
1
Mr. Erich the Interesting:
Search for a door out. The cobblestones are getting annoyingly rude.
4
Lowpolygon Blownaparte:
I spend time tending to my wounds and attempting to strategically position myself so that whatever appears out of any probable direction is immediately sighted and can be acted upon.
4-1=3
Alfie:
Summon a talking sword, preferably a witty one that quotes lines from movies but will shut up when I tell it to, I shall name it Stabby.
2
Kin the Scribe:
Seing that the cobblestones count down for something I decide to prepare whatever might come by etching each of my arrows with some destructive magic. That way, I will be shooting arrows of Explosive Death.
6
People are getting fed up with these cobblestones, King Frederick especially. Not wanting those damn cobblestones to start flying up again, he brings his mighty hammer down!
With an enormoush crash, the hammer rebounds and the king loses his balance and falls flat on his back. The cobblestone is perfectly unharmed, but the same can't be said about the warhammer, which is badly bent now.
Also, it's mightiness, not mightyness.
Two of the others, Lord Teanscones Fordinner and Han-Hans the truculent, decide to watch those tiles to make sure they don't get thrown off guard again. They become so focused on the tiles they forget the rest of the environment. Comedically, they bump into each other's backs, spin around and swing at each other. Lord Teanscones also dodges backwards at the same time, since his sword has a longer reach. However, he swings too high and it only breaks a bit off the crest on Hans-Hans' helmet. Hans-Hans completely misses Lord Teanscones, but the Earl fails to regain his balance and falls squarely on his noble behind, bruising it and his ego.
The Great Bambini curls up in a fetal position and mumbles something about soup. Lowpolygon rips up some of his shirt and seals his wound. Being a martial artist, this is obviously all he needs because he heals far faster than a normal human being, as well as containing far more blood.
Alfie starts up another summoning ritual, while Alessandro decides to prepare for the coming storm, but with extra heorism. He is too absorbed into considering how he will be far more dashing than anyone else to notice when suddenly, Ivanor walks up to him and slaps him, shouting "MAKE ME A SANDWICH, WOMAN!". The shock from Ivanor's unexpected outburst causes Alessandro to spastically fall right onto Alfie, completely ruining the ritual.
"I'm not a woman!"
"Oh? Well, I'm soooo sorry, your immense wimpiness must've confused me."
"Wimpiness?! I am Alessandro 'Di Antony, adventurer and gentleman extraordinaire, you rube! I have, uh, I have... Oh yeah, I forgot what I've done..."
"Bet'cha just sat around being pampered like right good sissy rich kid, amirite? Really, yo-"
"Oh, be QUIET! PLEASE!"
Mr. Erich interrupts the two.
"We have no time for insulting each other. It brings shame upon you both to bicker like that."
He then continues on his search, but is unable to find any way out. There are no obvious doors and so far he has been unable to find any hidden ones either. Quite a conundrum.
Finally, sitting alone in a corner, insofar as one can sit in the corner of a dome, Kin is madly carving symbols onto his arrows with a knife he picked up from somewhere, completely ignoring the cuts he gets on his fingers from working so recklessly.
He is finishing the thirteenth arrow when suddenly, the cobblestones start shaking. Cracks start to appear on their surfaces, small at first but constantly becoming bigger. The colors fade from them and they become regular brown cobblestones. Eventually, there is nothing left but gravel.
Qucikyl the Imp digbs himself out of the gravel, looking rather irritated.
As everyone is wondering what that meant, suddenly a loud, strange combination of a rumble and an ear-piercing screech resonates throughout the entire room, and Mr. Erich finds himself standing right in front of what he had been looking for: A way out.
But whatever is in there, he cannot see, because beyond a short tunnel is utter darkness which the light in the first room cannot penetrate...
Condition:
Normal
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Suit of Chainmail(statistical bonus)
Bent Warhammer(2H Weapon, ignores up to -2 of damage negation by armor, -1 to hit)
Skills:
None
-Lord Teanscones Fordinner, Earl of York
Condition:
Bruised
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Field Plate(-1 to damage received)
Claymore(2H Weapon, +1 to damage dealt)
Skills:
Novice Swordsman(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Tired(statistical penalty)
Pain(-1 to most actions)
Head wound(only a slight cut)
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Magical Armour(-1 to damage received, annoyingly British)
Skills:
Summoner(significant statistical bonus)
Novice Blood Mage(statistical bonus)
Familiar: Qucikyl the Imp
Condition: Squashed
Inventory: None
Skills: Hellpower(fire generation and various other effects), Regeneration(regenerates non-lethal injuries easily)
Condition:
Singed
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Katana(1H Weapon, statistical bonus)
Composite Armor(statistical bonus)
Skills:
Novice Mugger(statistical bonus)
Novice Dodger(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Normal
Inventory:
Cheese-stained Wifebeater
Rough Jeans
Tattered Baseball Cap
Billy Club(statistical bonus)
Skills:
Novice Slapper(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Normal
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Leather Armor(+1 to dodge)
Rapier(1H Weapon, statistical bonus)
Great Headdress(statistical bonus/malus, depending on the situation)
Skills:
Incompetent Poet(statistical malus)
Condition:
Normal
Inventory:
Beige Business Suit
Swordcane(1H Weapon)
Navy Blue Cape
Skills:
Novice Searcher(statistical bonus)
Condition:
Bruised
Chipped Teeth
Bandaged cut on left calf
Pain(-1 to physical actions)
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Skills:
Martial Artist(significant statistical bonus)
Novice Healer
Condition:
Normal
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Skills:
Novice Summoner
Novice Geometrymancer
Novice Geomancer
Condition:
Cut fingers(-1 to actions involving fingers)
Inventory:
Undetermined Clothing
Shortbow(2H Ranged Weapon)
Quiver(12 Arrows of Explosive Death, 1 Arrow of Explosive Dearth)
Leather Armor(+1 to dodge)
Green Cloak
Skills:
Novice Runecrafter
Author
Topic: Mad Wizard's Arena: An Update?! (Read 11743 times)