Why am I such a sarcastic, useless, annoying little sack of shit? Seriously. It seems like all I have to do is open my mouth and then suddenly whoever I'm talking to is pissed at me. And if they're not pissed, they're almost always ignoring me. I can't even stop talking to prevent this, because if I do it's "OH, I GET IT! YOU HATE ME AND NOW YOU'RE GIVING ME THE SILENT TREATMENT! THAT SHIT HURTS YA' KNOW!" from my parents, and 'friends' think something along those lines, although less extreme.
Try telling them that the sarcasm is just your schtick. They might reject that explanation, but then they might accept that you don't really mean everything you say to the fullest extent.
Or find another bitter and sarcastic person, then you can be bitter and sarcastic together. There's a lot of people for whom being sarcastic towards everyone and everything is completely normal.
Not sure if that helps. I had a period in which I was exceedingly annoying and sarcastic, but I forgot it already. I forget things easily. It's strange and distressing. I'm pretty young, but I keep forgetting. It's like, I examine some belief of mine, and I remember that this thing was a revelation for me, that I used to believe differently, and when I finally accepted this one, I was content for a while. But I can't remember what the revelation was. That makes this belief unsubstantiated, even though
I distinctly remember that there was a reason. That makes me reject it in turn and pick another one, but I'm left with the sneaking suspicion that once I forget the reason I picked it, I'll be forced to abandon it as well.
This might be a little too much groundless introspection. But it's like this: it's unavoidable and good for one's beliefs to evolve based on new data. But mine seem to evolve based on old data being lost more than new data being gained. That bothers me.