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Author Topic: Things that made you sad today thread.  (Read 9495910 times)

Vector

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18885 on: December 23, 2010, 06:36:05 pm »

You should get that checked out. It's starting to sound like an eye disease my friend had called iritis. It can result in blindness if untreated...

My cousin has that.  I might be able to get some information.


I seem to be raging today, absolutely everywhere... it's my fault for skimping on my mood stabilizers for the past month.  I'm angry at the Christmas holidays, angry at the stupid hierarchy in my extended family, angry at waking up late, angry at being unable to sleep, angry at stupid people who get into relationships and smear it all over everyone else like they're somehow intrinsically better because they've managed to nab someone, more wise, better endowed with clarity of spirit and goddamned intellect.

I'm not saying all people are this way... just many of the people my age, the twerps.  And it's not that I want a relationship.  It's that I'm tired of the structure of our gimped and misguided society, and of a certain lack of humility.  I'm tired of people using other people to make them feel better about themselves by shunting themselves up the layers, either by association with high-rankers or the fawning adoration of people they can pretend are "below" them.

I'm not saying I'm better than these people are, though I can certainly say I try not to behave the way they do.  I can say merely that they piss me off, and in a mood where everything is pissing me off it's not good to be one of the piss-inducers (i.e. diuretics, haha).

Goddammit, I hate my reliance on these pills.  One minute calm, one minute crying, the next one raging... bleh.  At least I know what I have to do to take care of myself.

I could rant more, and I would, but I'd just look crazy.  Everything is putting me on edge today and I just can't seem to stop being agitated.  I could barely sleep last night, even though I was exhausted at 2--woke up at 9 like I just hadn't gone to bed at all.  I hate feeling so crazy.  I don't know if I mind the anger so much or not, because I make sense to myself and it's just "oh hey, if you're angry and you actually notice for once, clap your hands" but hell, the agitation is annoying me and making me feel like a twisted-up nutbag.  And I feel like running everywhere, except I know that's bull and I really just want to feel less RAWR.

Okay, I've hit the rant limit for this post so I'll stop talking now.
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"The question of the usefulness of poetry arises only in periods of its decline, while in periods of its flowering, no one doubts its total uselessness." - Boris Pasternak

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Leafsnail

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18886 on: December 23, 2010, 07:15:23 pm »

Goddammit, I hate my reliance on these pills.  One minute calm, one minute crying, the next one raging... bleh.  At least I know what I have to do to take care of myself.
Just out of interest, does this mean "you feel down until you take the pills", or...?
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The Merchant Of Menace

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18887 on: December 23, 2010, 07:19:35 pm »

Gah, Feeling emo about my daughter again.. T_T
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Heron TSG

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18888 on: December 23, 2010, 07:20:03 pm »

I feel for you, Vector. You don't sound crazy on the intertubes, at least.
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lordnincompoop

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18889 on: December 23, 2010, 07:23:33 pm »

Snip

Wow, that's awful. Especially at this time of year. Me heart goes out to you, Vector.

Though to be fair, from what I've seen people have been treating you horribly, so you have quite the right to raeg.

It seems that you really detest those pills. Is there really no alternative course of treatment?

I'm sorry I can't provide more/better support.

You should get that checked out. It's starting to sound like an eye disease my friend had called iritis. It can result in blindness if untreated...

Apparently associated symptoms are ocular pain, blurred vision, photophobia, and reddened eyes.

I think you should check with the doctor as soon as you can Solifuge. Quality of life is a higher prority than moeny; after all, you don't want to live the rest of your life with blindness/brain damage/decreased quality of life/something.

Goddammit, I hate my reliance on these pills.  One minute calm, one minute crying, the next one raging... bleh.  At least I know what I have to do to take care of myself.
Just out of interest, does this mean "you feel down until you take the pills", or...?

From what I can gather she stops having awful mood swings after taking them.

Oh and sorry MoM if I made you sad or hurt your feelins earlier.  :(
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The Merchant Of Menace

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18890 on: December 23, 2010, 07:58:20 pm »

Nah, s'okay. just a *slightly* bad choice of video X3
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Vector

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18891 on: December 23, 2010, 09:18:08 pm »

Just out of interest, does this mean "you feel down until you take the pills", or...?

It seems that you really detest those pills. Is there really no alternative course of treatment?

It's "when I stop taking the pills, I start having irrational mood swings again."  It's not "down" so much as "overwhelmingly angry and irritable for no reason whatsoever," or "panicky and anxious" or "depressed and crying with no cause."  As long as I take them regularly, I can keep my emotions on a smooth curve rather than a jagged one.

They're the fish oil pills I talked about earlier, to control an Omega-3 fatty acids deficiency.  They have no negative side effects, other than being mild blood thinners--which really isn't a problem, because my blood has always coagulated pretty darned quickly.

I hate being dependent on stuff like this, but if I didn't take fish pills then I'd probably have to take some sort of horrible inorganic mood stabilizer.  I feel a lot better after a couple of hours beating my head against binary operations and function spaces, but I'm probably going to have to do a lot more work tonight if I want a chance at sleeping.

And yes, they incurred my rage because pretty much everything in the universe was incurring my rage at that point.  Needing to eat food annoys me, too >_>  I'm not exactly at my most rational.

Well, anyway, I've calmed down to a mere "irritable/tense/on edge," so I'm going to hope that I can keep a can on it for the next few days.  Maybe I'll go for a little milk or some other sort of comfort food.

No one's been treating me badly, really.  I've just kind of temporarily lost my blinders of "things may be strange and irrational out there, but it's all going to be okay," and I'm swimming around in the "The world is full of a strange and terrible muck!" point of view.

Bleh.  I'll be all right quite soon, I think.
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"The question of the usefulness of poetry arises only in periods of its decline, while in periods of its flowering, no one doubts its total uselessness." - Boris Pasternak

nonbinary/genderfluid/genderqueer renegade mathematician and mafia subforum limpet. please avoid quoting me.

pronouns: prefer neutral ones, others are fine. height: 5'3".

Realmfighter

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18892 on: December 23, 2010, 09:57:05 pm »

After looking for computers to buy, I find that I have no idea how to buy a computer.

Kind people of Dwarf Fortress, Is this computer good?
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Cthulhu

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18893 on: December 23, 2010, 09:59:29 pm »

Looks about the same as mine, which can run pretty much any game available right now at High settings, for about twice the price.  Note that it also doesn't have an operating system, so you'll have to buy or pirate that.

If you'r enot comfortable building a computer (And if you have no idea how to buy one you probably aren't) it looks like it might be pretty good.
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Aqizzar

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18894 on: December 23, 2010, 10:09:17 pm »

Still can't get my $100 terabyte drive to work, and I already know that I can't return it to Fry's.  I'm afraid that at this point, "fixing" it will require going to Best Buy on Christmas Eve to try to find a USB adapter thing.
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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18895 on: December 23, 2010, 11:16:30 pm »

Just out of interest, does this mean "you feel down until you take the pills", or...?

It seems that you really detest those pills. Is there really no alternative course of treatment?

It's "when I stop taking the pills, I start having irrational mood swings again."  It's not "down" so much as "overwhelmingly angry and irritable for no reason whatsoever," or "panicky and anxious" or "depressed and crying with no cause."  As long as I take them regularly, I can keep my emotions on a smooth curve rather than a jagged one.

They're the fish oil pills I talked about earlier, to control an Omega-3 fatty acids deficiency.  They have no negative side effects, other than being mild blood thinners--which really isn't a problem, because my blood has always coagulated pretty darned quickly.

I hate being dependent on stuff like this, but if I didn't take fish pills then I'd probably have to take some sort of horrible inorganic mood stabilizer.  I feel a lot better after a couple of hours beating my head against binary operations and function spaces, but I'm probably going to have to do a lot more work tonight if I want a chance at sleeping.

And yes, they incurred my rage because pretty much everything in the universe was incurring my rage at that point.  Needing to eat food annoys me, too >_>  I'm not exactly at my most rational.

Well, anyway, I've calmed down to a mere "irritable/tense/on edge," so I'm going to hope that I can keep a can on it for the next few days.  Maybe I'll go for a little milk or some other sort of comfort food.

No one's been treating me badly, really.  I've just kind of temporarily lost my blinders of "things may be strange and irrational out there, but it's all going to be okay," and I'm swimming around in the "The world is full of a strange and terrible muck!" point of view.

Bleh.  I'll be all right quite soon, I think.
I sorta know how you feel. I have nasty mood swings at times, and am generally on edge. I'm sure my problem is a few magnitudes lower than yours, but I just wanted you to know there are some things in the universe that are on you side. :)
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Gunner-Chan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18896 on: December 23, 2010, 11:20:17 pm »

Still can't get my $100 terabyte drive to work

Ah hah... Wat? $100? Mine was like $50... What the hell.
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Realmfighter

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18897 on: December 24, 2010, 01:25:00 am »

God damn why do places insist on you having at least one number in your password.

That does not help me keep my account securely in my hands

At least if I can't have it no one will.
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Gunner-Chan

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18898 on: December 24, 2010, 01:44:29 am »

Ugh why do I always get these downer spells when I have no one to talk to...

Eva why do you need to sleep so early lately. :<
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MaximumZero

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Re: Things that made you sad today thread.
« Reply #18899 on: December 24, 2010, 02:23:10 am »

Talk to me, Janet! Talk to meeeeeee....
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