snippy
Mines even funnier
1.US gold coins used to say 'In BFEL we trust'.
2.BFEL can be very poisonous if injected intravenously.
3.Ancient Greeks believed earthquakes were caused by BFEL fighting underground.
4.The condom - originally made from BFEL - was invented in the early 1500s.
5.The average human spends about 30 days during their life in BFEL!
6.The international dialling code for BFEL is 672.
7.Women shoplift four times more frequently than BFEL!
8.If you drop BFEL from more than three metres above ground level, he will always land feet-first.
9.The military salute is a motion that evolved from medieval times, when knights in armour raised their visors to reveal BFEL!
10.Banging your head against BFEL uses 150 calories an hour!
EDIT: OH FUCKING BALLS, I FOUND THE BEST THING EVER:
1.Donald Duck's middle name is sex.
2.It's bad luck to put sex on a bed.
3.You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching sex.
4.Only one child in twenty will be born on the day predicted by sex.
5.The military salute is a motion that evolved from medieval times, when knights in armour raised their visors to reveal sex.
6.A chimpanzee can learn to recognize itself in a mirror, but sex can not!
7.The National Heart Foundation recommends eating sex at least three times a week.
8.The sex-fighting market in the Philippines is huge - several thousand sex-fights take place there every day.
9.99 percent of the pumpkins sold in the US end up as sex.
10.Sex can eat up to four kilograms of insects in a single night.
1. Obviously
2. DO IT ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER, ITS MUCH SAFER
3. Porn: Not good exercise.
4. This one...might actually be true, if taken less then literally :P
5. EVERYTHING HAS THIS ONE.
6. So those ceiling mirrors are actually just decoration, WHO KNEW?
7. The National Heart Foundation fully supports both cunnilingus and fellatio XD
8. Once again, probably true.
9. WHUT
10. This umm...wow.