Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 5

Author Topic: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?  (Read 4453 times)

zchris13

  • Bay Watcher
  • YOU SPIN ME RIGHT ROUND~
    • View Profile
Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« on: May 09, 2009, 08:32:54 pm »
Those stupid elves just decided to CRAWL, literally, (yeah, known bug), to my debot, and when I checked what they had brought:

Cloth.  Bin after bin of CLOTH.  21 bins of cloth, along with 3 more pieces of random cloth just lying there, outside of bins.  I have heard of them bringing nothing but berries or something, but just cloth? Weird.

NOTHING BUT CLOTH!!!

Logged
this sigtext was furiously out-of-date and has been jettisoned

LegoLord

  • Bay Watcher
  • Can you see it now?
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2009, 08:52:26 pm »
GCS . . . oh wait, elves, not deep elves.

Nothing of any value.  I had to steal the awesome exotic pets from them.  The SOBs.
Logged
Quote from: Vlynndar on April 02, 2009, 03:36:26 pm
"Oh look there is a dragon my clothes might burn let me take them off and only wear steel plate."
And this is how tinned food was invented.
Quote from: Vester on October 10, 2009, 10:10:11 pm
Alternately: The Brick Testament. It's a really fun look at what the bible would look like if interpreted literally. With Legos.
Just so I remember

Liwjatan

  • Bay Watcher
  • I swallow your soul!
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #2 on: May 09, 2009, 09:02:53 pm »
Cages.Lots of them.Decorated with corpses of animals.Ah yes,starting a fortress on glaciers..
You have to admire their spirit to travel thorugh hundreds of miles of vast empty space of seemingly endless ice just to have their <Rope Reed thread> taken away from them.Wait,what,admire?What those punny elves are doing is just plain stupid.Pfeh..silly elves..

Just before anyone can do the oh so obvious joke;Bones.And skulls.
Logged

Heron TSG

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Seal Goddess
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #3 on: May 09, 2009, 09:45:47 pm »
laughter and cougars. At the same time.
Logged

Est Sularus Oth Mithas
The Artist Formerly Known as Barbarossa TSG

The Mad Engineer

  • Bay Watcher
  • Tock.
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #4 on: May 09, 2009, 10:04:16 pm »
An emblem, apparently...

Logged

zchris13

  • Bay Watcher
  • YOU SPIN ME RIGHT ROUND~
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #5 on: May 09, 2009, 10:06:43 pm »
Quote from: The Mad Engineer on May 09, 2009, 10:04:16 pm
An emblem, apparently...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Logged
this sigtext was furiously out-of-date and has been jettisoned

Felius

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #6 on: May 09, 2009, 10:13:27 pm »
Quote from: zchris13 on May 09, 2009, 10:06:43 pm
Quote from: The Mad Engineer on May 09, 2009, 10:04:16 pm
An emblem, apparently...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

Wait, is it a dead elf?
Logged
"Why? We're the Good Guys, aren't we?"
"Yes, but that rather hinges on doing certain things and not doing others." - Paraphrased from Discworld.

Skorpion

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #7 on: May 09, 2009, 10:44:57 pm »
Breeding pairs of black bears, grizzly bears, and jaguars. And a single cougar.
Plus extracts and clothing to sell to the humans in summer, and literally more rope reed cloth than I know what to do with.
And some lovely elf, camel, and muskox skull totems to sell, as well.

All taken by 'force', thanks to my wind-powered elf-drowning system.
Logged
The *large serrated steel disk* strikes the Raven in the head, tearing apart the muscle, shattering the skull, and tearing apart the brain!
A tendon in the skull has been torn!
The Raven has been knocked unconcious!

Elves do it in trees. Humans do it in wooden structures. Dwarves? Dwarves do it underground. With magma.

The Mad Engineer

  • Bay Watcher
  • Tock.
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #8 on: May 09, 2009, 10:46:24 pm »
Quote from: zchris13 on May 09, 2009, 10:06:43 pm
Quote from: The Mad Engineer on May 09, 2009, 10:04:16 pm
An emblem, apparently...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

If it's any consolation, they don't know better.  It's year 1 after all.  They probably don't even know what an elf looks like.
Logged

Bricks

  • Bay Watcher
  • Because you never need one brick.
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #9 on: May 09, 2009, 11:08:17 pm »
Only thing I've ever bought was wood, on a fairly sparse plains map.  And 50% of the time, I accidentally, somehow, trade something that once brushed up against a dwarf that saw a tree, and they just FLIP OUT.  Now I look for maps with at least one speck of a heavily forested biome.

Only thing they ever seem to have is, yes, cloth.  What the hell are they thinking?  The moat of magma should have implied that this was not a department store.
Logged
EMPATHY - being able to feel other peoples' stuff.

Fossaman

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #10 on: May 09, 2009, 11:16:11 pm »
Giant Desert Scorpions, Sun Berries, and Rhesus macaques.

Because there's no wrong way to eat a rhesus.
Logged
Quote from: ThreeToe
This story had a slide down a chute. Everybody likes chutes.

Hagadorn

  • Bay Watcher
  • [NO-GIFTS] [NAUGHTY]
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #11 on: May 09, 2009, 11:44:00 pm »
wood...


Lots and Lots of wood.

I love my elves... as much as it possible to love the horrific cannibal tree hugging retards
Logged
Quote from: warlordzephyr on June 26, 2009, 12:19:06 pm
You see, booze is a parasite. It lives off dwarves and compels them to dig into the ground so as to create massive defences to protect it's self. It really shouldn't be called dwarf fortress, Booze fortress would make much more sense.

They Got Leader

  • Bay Watcher
  • Current Fortress:
    • View Profile
    • Steam Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #12 on: May 09, 2009, 11:48:18 pm »
Best one ever: wounded cougar.

However, turns out that the cougar liked the taste of dwarf flesh... stupid elves... damn their tricksiness
Logged
Quote from: Urist McDwarfFortress
You do not understand the ways of Toady One. He is not a business, he's just a guy trying to make a fun game. He's invited people to come along and experience the journey with him (and help him test it out as he goes along). At the end of the day, I don't think his main goal is to sell Dwarf Fortress, its just to create the best game possible.

Royal Surveyor

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #13 on: May 09, 2009, 11:53:20 pm »
The elves bring me caged animals, occasional training implements.

And when I'm bored, blood for the Blood God.
Logged

azrael4h

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
    • My Dwarf Fortress-centric You Tube videos, part of my nominally vintage gaming channel.
Re: Stupid Elves. What have the elves brought YOU?
« Reply #14 on: May 09, 2009, 11:55:16 pm »
They bring me food, large exotic critters, food, and wood. And cloth. Lots and lots of cloth. All "donated" to the cause of keeping my forts running. At least I can keep my dwarves in fresh, high quality clothes. I end up with so much cloth and leather that I could make everyone legendary on those respective skills.
Logged
Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 5
« previous next »