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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2210353 times)

FritzPL

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4410 on: May 06, 2011, 09:21:44 am »

Miner just took a nap in half of the room mining. I would draw it as an epic art,but I am no artist.

TerryDactyl

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4411 on: May 06, 2011, 06:16:18 pm »

Two adamant failures:

The first being well-clad swordsman who followed a frogman into the lake and drowned, fighting.

After a months-long recovery operation, we were able to equip a new soldier in the former's gear. When the cyclops came, we made him our champion. Convinced of his invulnerability, he strolled up to the brute and was promptly thrown ~30 tiles and GIBBED against a soil wall. His arms, his head, his legs just popped right off.

Time to send in the militia....

FritzPL

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4412 on: May 07, 2011, 07:19:50 am »

Discovering removing up stairs/ramps option



Are you fuckin' KIDDING ME?


MONTHS of digging and channeling,digging and channeling...

Organum

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4413 on: May 07, 2011, 08:44:34 am »

There's also a bit in DFhack that automatically removes ramps desginated for derampification. Sure, it's cheatery, but if it means a less complicated screen...
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If dwarves decided to live in trees like hippies, they'd still do it better than the elves.

AnimaRytak

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4414 on: May 07, 2011, 01:51:19 pm »

Realizing that bedrooms would auto-assigned to dwarves if they were unclaimed.

I flat out facedesk'd on that one.
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[RUMGOD][MURDERMACHINES_OVERLORD]
Quote from: StLeibowitz
Quote from: Yuli Vlasi
It's probably worth mentioning that AnimaRytak is the only ecstatic dwarf in the entire fort.
Quick, check him for rum! The bastard's probably spirited some off to his lair office, to act as pleasant refreshment as his evil scheme unfolds!

EveryZig

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4415 on: May 07, 2011, 02:12:35 pm »

Just lost ANOTHER marksdwarf to that obnoxious thing where your marksdwarf refuses to stay on the right side of the wall. I HATE that so much.
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Soaplent green is goblins!

Shootandrun

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4416 on: May 07, 2011, 02:39:41 pm »

My fortress was going well. The two first seasons were over. There was some giant badgers around (The Mighty King of the Beasts) but I was not afraid. They were far from here.

And then, BOOM! The dwarfs get spotted by the badgers, one minute later, they are all dead.

Please, Toady, don't nerf them.
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EvilWink

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4417 on: May 07, 2011, 09:03:19 pm »

So I am facing a mass dehydration in my fortress because I cant get any wood to make barrels during an invasion. I decide that Im probably going to lose the fort anyways, so I send my two legendary axedwarves to stand behind my drawbridge and prepare to make a heroic last stand.

I pull the lever...


...and the bridge atom-smashes the two dwarfs and the invaders kill my fort
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Andal

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4418 on: May 07, 2011, 09:21:43 pm »

So I am facing a mass dehydration in my fortress because I cant get any wood to make barrels during an invasion. I decide that Im probably going to lose the fort anyways, so I send my two legendary axedwarves to stand behind my drawbridge and prepare to make a heroic last stand.

I pull the lever...


...and the bridge atom-smashes the two dwarfs and the invaders kill my fort

... you know you can make pots, functional equivalents of barrels, out of stone, right?
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When I was reorganizing my inventory to fit all by books on life and death into various bags and things, I looked at my inventory and saw that I was multigrasping a necromancer slab.  It was pretty hilarious.
I think that would be an excellent way to impart the critical lessons of life and death to the ignorant masses.

EvilWink

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4419 on: May 07, 2011, 09:29:20 pm »

So I am facing a mass dehydration in my fortress because I cant get any wood to make barrels during an invasion. I decide that Im probably going to lose the fort anyways, so I send my two legendary axedwarves to stand behind my drawbridge and prepare to make a heroic last stand.

I pull the lever...


...and the bridge atom-smashes the two dwarfs and the invaders kill my fort

... you know you can make pots, functional equivalents of barrels, out of stone, right?

Facepalm part 2
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tryrar

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4420 on: May 08, 2011, 12:32:29 am »

not a facepalm moment for ME exactly, but for the game as it embarked my wagon right on top of a frozen pool....and when the pool thawed out, well hilarity ensued
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This fort really does sit on the event horizon of madness and catastrophe
No. I suppose there are similarities, but I'm fairly certain angry birds doesn't let me charge into a battalion of knights with a car made of circular saws.

Necro910

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4421 on: May 08, 2011, 02:30:05 pm »

not a facepalm moment for ME exactly, but for the game as it embarked my wagon right on top of a frozen pool....and when the pool thawed out, well hilarity ensued
Just wait until the water pulls your items into an alternate dimension.

Griffin

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4422 on: May 08, 2011, 11:30:15 pm »

facepalm #1= My most skilled marksdwarf running out on to the field during a goblin siege, and then falling into a small pond and drowns to the death.

facepalm #2= Building a grand bedroom for a noble, then that noble dies. A group of migrants come and some random dwarf claims it. My current Barony, an ex-military dwarf named "Stumpy" thanks to the loss of his right foot goes on tantrum when he realizes a commoner has a better bedroom than he does and punches a legendary craftsdwarf through the head, killing him...then gets extremely depressed about it so he goes to his dining room, sits down, and then goes berserk. My military comes out with training axes and beats him to death.

Up until then he lived a decent life. Almost lost my fortress to a tantrum spiral at that point.
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Knick

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4423 on: May 09, 2011, 08:15:05 am »

Could not understand why my woodcutter was so unhappy, and eating vermin.  Then I discovered that I had not carved down steps into my fortress entrance, thus trapping the little treekiller on the surface.
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Quote
Give a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day.  Light a man on fire and you keep him warm for the rest of his life.
The great Dwarfen Philosopher Urist McConfused said it best:  "Light a kitten on fire and it will run screaming into the booze stockpile and catch the whole fort up.  I know, we tested it in twelve different forts and it always happened."

cam94509

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #4424 on: May 09, 2011, 12:32:38 pm »

Trolls. They are building destroyers. I had forgotten that.

I was all like "lololol, stupid goblins, you can't get in that way! The door is forbidden! Stop running across the weapon traps, and just leave, you can't... Oh. Right. Not good."
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