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Author Topic: Face Palm moments you had in Dwarf Fortress  (Read 2214356 times)

Lord Shonus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1650 on: May 12, 2010, 04:00:34 am »

For future reference, what happened was that he wasn't assigned a pick as part of his military uniform.
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On Giant In the Playground and Something Awful I am Gnoman.
Man, ninja'd by a potentially inebriated Lord Shonus. I was gonna say to burn it.

iEpinephrine

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1651 on: May 12, 2010, 08:11:33 am »

Spending three hours experimenting with gear assemblies, pumps, and water to produce a chamber that locks itself and floods when a pressure plate is triggered.  Finally I get it finished, send in my sacrificial dwarf for final test.... he steps on the trigger and... the gear assemblies, windmills and vertical supports tumble gracefully into the brook... they had been hanging and I didn't notice... the pressure plate was ingeniously hooked up as a convenient way to dismantle my entire evening's work :O
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Lord Shonus

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1652 on: May 12, 2010, 08:22:13 am »

After spending a horrendous amount of time (a full year) penetrating an aquifer, I decided to play with the military without saving. Game crashed.
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On Giant In the Playground and Something Awful I am Gnoman.
Man, ninja'd by a potentially inebriated Lord Shonus. I was gonna say to burn it.

TheyTarget

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1653 on: May 12, 2010, 10:45:01 am »

Okay. I'm new, I thought I'd try this thing out its pretty awesome. I watched the video tutorials I have the wiki up religiously. And I started to get he hang of it all. I decided to get a new tileset and finally create my masterpiece the other day. I embark on an island with a volcano that only the dwarfs trade to. I decided to make three greek cross shapes into towers spanning from above the volcano to the ocean bed, which is like 30 z levels I think. I start getting a nice work going, I build 4 levels of bedrooms and then pump filtered water through pumps so every bedroom floor has 3 wells, and I start thinking this is good. I get my magma forges going and make a nice 10 man guard squad and start working on the third tower base, a prison. I build some defenses and start hallowing it out. At this moment, I think I want to pump some magma through here in case of a breakout, so I dont make new pumps but break down my old pumps. I give the command and then get a notice Urist McCaptainOfTheGuard is throwing a tantrum. I go crap and zoom over, to see him start a fist fight, with a battle axe, which he stabs into the chest of Urist McRanger, I calm down when my other 9 guards start fighting back, and cut of Urist McCaptainOfTheGuards toe, both of them end up in the hospital. At this the guard who took his toe tantrums and cuts Urist McFarmer in half and promptly get dragged off to my prison. I leave him, when Urist McLegendaryCarpenter goes to give him a drink and he tantrums again (my jail is chain restraints) and he lodges his ax in my carpenters leg. I then dump his battle ax, which Urist McUseless child takes getting stabbed in the process. My Hospital is starting to fill up, and didnt realize my miners, dug out my magma forges and the third tower is now flooding with lava and my pumps where the only thing holding back my floors of water from flooding though the first tower. My dwarfs are now screwed  Tower one the peasant tower is flooding, and tower 3 the prison is now filling with magma, and tower two, only has useless nobles. Lots of Fun... Well Time to start again.
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Code: [Select]
This is a platinum warhammer. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. it menaces with spikes of platinum.
there is an image of the goblin Utes Gozrusrozsnus and dwarves in elf bone. The goblin is making a plaintive gesture. the dwarves are striking a menacing pose.
this image relates to the slaying of Utes Gozrusroz

derekiv

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1654 on: May 12, 2010, 01:08:51 pm »

Spending three hours experimenting with gear assemblies, pumps, and water to produce a chamber that locks itself and floods when a pressure plate is triggered.  Finally I get it finished, send in my sacrificial dwarf for final test.... he steps on the trigger and... the gear assemblies, windmills and vertical supports tumble gracefully into the brook... they had been hanging and I didn't notice... the pressure plate was ingeniously hooked up as a convenient way to dismantle my entire evening's work :O
Did something similar:
Made my own degrinchinator, and it turns out some part of it froze, breaking the whole system. I abandoned.
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tastypaste

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1655 on: May 12, 2010, 01:31:27 pm »

I made drowning chambers in my workshop to take care of berserk dwarfs from moods. I close the door and pull a lever to open the appropriate floodgate and drown that workshop. But I made two crucial mistakes

Code: [Select]
~~~~~~~~~
##X###X##
#www#www#
#www#www#
#www#www#
##D###D##

~ is a channel of water
X is a floodgate
www is the workshop area
# is walls
D is door

1. There's no way to get the body out without digging a hole in the wall and repairing it each time because dwarfs won't use doors that have 7/7 water behind them and a closed door can't drain water.
2. There's a staircase right in front of the workshops and when the wall is breached it drains water, blood, and mud down the stairs right onto the engraved floor of the dining hall which leads to a coating of mud which leads to impertinent vegetation defacing masterpiece engravings.

Next time I'll have a second floodgate instead of a door so it can be opened and closed remotely, and drained into a small channel in front of the workshop which will move the dirty water out to a drainage area. I'm also going to integrate the drowning system into the moat so I don't have multiple waterways running through the upper levels of the fort. Should be a lot cleaner and more efficient.
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Denethor went berserk!

Urist Imiknorris

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1656 on: May 12, 2010, 03:57:12 pm »

Summer was great, got some migrants, forgot to pause, lost everyone but my planter to the melting rain bug, saving now.

This after I forget to embark with either a pick or the materials to make one.
« Last Edit: May 12, 2010, 04:17:25 pm by Urist Imiknorris »
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Hicks

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1657 on: May 12, 2010, 04:58:05 pm »

I get a migrant wave and in some huge coincidence I get two legendary blacksmiths that are in a relationship with each other. Now, for some unknown reason one of them decides to go over to local carp pond which is fucking SWARMING with the little fuckers. So he gets dragged in and promptly drowns. The other blacksmith then throws a tantrum and starts punching people. That's where my fucking hammerer decides he has to step in and crush the surviving blacksmith's head with his hammer. I was looking at my screen in rage for about five minutes before coming up with a devious plan to break all of the bones in that goggle-eyed little cunt's body. Long story short, he's not walking much anymore.
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ThiefofTime

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1658 on: May 12, 2010, 09:17:24 pm »

My current project fort seems to be in wildlife heaven.  The problem with this is that they keep filling up my cages by trying to wander into my nice moat enshrouded castle.  I keep having to release and slay them to keep empty cages for gobbos.  Well the real problem in this is that I have to keep war dogs at the entrance to keep the worthless wildlife out of my cages, but then the gobbos come by and kill the dogs.  Then, depending on my stocks, they run in through possibly empty cage traps since I keep having to cycle my cages.  Then I have to train more dogs, and in the meantime more animals fill up my cages.

More annoying than facepalm worthy, until a frakin raccoon pushed a dwarf off a wall and into my moat.  Come on, a raccoon?
Try adding the [TRAINABLE] tag to the local wildlife, and put THEM on guard duty. Or just get them slaughtered when you catch them.
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Graygan

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1659 on: May 12, 2010, 09:31:12 pm »

I get a migrant wave and in some huge coincidence I get two legendary blacksmiths that are in a relationship with each other. Now, for some unknown reason one of them decides to go over to local carp pond which is fucking SWARMING with the little fuckers. So he gets dragged in and promptly drowns. The other blacksmith then throws a tantrum and starts punching people. That's where my fucking hammerer decides he has to step in and crush the surviving blacksmith's head with his hammer. I was looking at my screen in rage for about five minutes before coming up with a devious plan to break all of the bones in that goggle-eyed little cunt's body. Long story short, he's not walking much anymore.

My hammerers never get a chance to hurt anyone.  They moment they go to look at their lovely quarters, they get locked in and left to starve.
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derekiv

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1660 on: May 12, 2010, 09:34:22 pm »

I get a migrant wave and in some huge coincidence I get two legendary blacksmiths that are in a relationship with each other. Now, for some unknown reason one of them decides to go over to local carp pond which is fucking SWARMING with the little fuckers. So he gets dragged in and promptly drowns. The other blacksmith then throws a tantrum and starts punching people. That's where my fucking hammerer decides he has to step in and crush the surviving blacksmith's head with his hammer. I was looking at my screen in rage for about five minutes before coming up with a devious plan to break all of the bones in that goggle-eyed little cunt's body. Long story short, he's not walking much anymore.

My hammerers never get a chance to hurt anyone.  They moment they go to look at their lovely quarters, they get locked in and left to starve.
Starve? They require a 120 z drop. Results in quite a nice explosion of body parts. Not enough blood for the blood gods altar though.
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Thornet

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1661 on: May 12, 2010, 11:53:22 pm »

My 3 legendary miners have all either killed or severely injured themselves trying to dig out my moat  >:(
Yes Urist, stand on that square and channel out the only connecting square, that's the proper way to do it   :(

This is a problem. Now where am I going to get the gabbro to supply my 60 masons with?
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Rex_Nex

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1662 on: May 13, 2010, 03:41:59 am »

The best thing a Dwarf Fortress player can get:


You should all strive to be like me. Urist McLucky
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Eagle_eye

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1663 on: May 13, 2010, 12:18:45 pm »

Wow. I had that happen right as my Kill The Goblins With Fiery Magma And Rushing Water Then MIne Out Their Corpeses(KTGWFMARWTMOTC) tm, was completed.
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Deathworks

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Re: Face Palm moments you had
« Reply #1664 on: May 13, 2010, 12:23:27 pm »

Hi!

Have you confirmed that the save got corrupted?

Personally, I have found the cleaning up effort to be crash prone (the only crashes I actually got in the new version (^_^;; ). So, the save was alright (the cleaning happens right after the save), but the game terminated - since I usually want to quit the game anyhow, that has not been much of a problem for me.

Deathworks
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