"You know me so well, Blacklight." You admit as you change into your suit, only mildly annoyed that your shell has no bits and bobs to show off as you change clothing.
"Tell Pete that Lustarms didn't nick anything last night when he wakes up, would you darling?"As it is broad daylight, you decide to be a bit cautious, and take off from the roof rather than walk out the front door in all your bespoke gargoyle glory.
Since our strength depends directly on our battery supply, it might be best to set up a passive way to recharge batteries now so we have victims to fuel them later. If we end up getting in over our heads before we get more we'll end up running out, even if we're full now.
We should have our six nameless minions start up a kidnapping operation, with Blacklight using her human morality to take good care of our victims until we actually need them. Since we're in Detroit they can probably just steal a van and throw random people in it and nobody will notice.
On the flight back to the Big Apple, you consider a battery farming operation. In theory, this is something you could do, but in practice there is an obstacle: Money. Between food, security, and feces cleanup duty it is expensive to stockpile human prisoners. Up until this point, between your henchmen level jobs, saturating the Detroit and New York markets with Demonic Batteries, and Pete's nightclub operation, your little family has barely broke even. Your plan had always been to gain solid financial footing by making Underling Rank and investing your first real villainous paycheck back into Pete's business so that he may hire staff and host more profitable events. A successful nightclub brings in a lot of cash, and makes for a great way to launder other ill-gotten gains you might come across. As things stand right now, Pete is too busy between his film project and serving as your second in command to have the theatre open more than a few nights a week.
With any luck you will find work today, and get the ball rolling on all that soon.
I say we look for work. There's some interesting things we could do with a demonic nightclub, but it's probably more important to figure out what our boss is going to be like first.
One good thing about being able to fly is that you can land directly on the helipad at EAEAS headquarters and walk right into the executive suits, skipping a conversation with Johnny Jungleblade or whatever other boring past-their-prime scumbag is working as the greeter at ground level.
Approaching the receptionist, you flash your credential, and after a brief delay you are escorted into Comrade Morozov's office. The Russian out of Time is currently the Agency's Coordinator for Underling Level Headhunting. Morozov looks you up and down with the most stoic of Russian expressions, but you can smell a strong but well repressed hate underneath the surface; You suppose this is understandable, the time traveling WWII officer is said to have matched wits with some of Hitler's best demonolgists and warlocks and lost much in the process.
"Ah. Comrade Daydream. It is good to meet you for first time despite you regularly visiting this office for the better part of six years. Funny coincidence, no?""You can dispense with the pleasantries, Comrade Morozov. I know of and can literally smell your distaste for my kind." You smirk,
"But I also hear great things about your professionalism. So how about you just show me what is avaible, so we can get out of each other's hair?"The headhunter nods curtly, and produces five folders, three black and two white, from his desk.
"You can look at these. In lobby. Away from me. Make choice quick; Was told to let you have first choice to celebrate promotion. Don't make good human underlings wait."Heeding the good comrade's advice, you take the folders out into the lobby. You look at the black ones first; Jobs posted by proper supervillains seeking underlings to fill them. The agency's bread and butter. Your means of moving up in the world.
Employer: Enzo Earndhart-Mercy and Gina Earndhart-Mercy
Base of Operations: Mansion, Hollywood, CA, USA
Duration: 3 Months or until completion
Payment: **
Description: Dylan Mercy, better known as the auto-themed supervillain Pileup, has set some money aside to establish his two youngest children, a pair of twins who want to get into the family business. They are looking to hire a competent underling to help them steal some exotic cars and military vehicles that they may use as parts for their first death machines.
Noteworthy Office Comments:
This should go to one of the new Underlings. They can grow alongside an equally green villainy org, and possibly forge a long lasting partnership -Helen
Employer: Sister Agatha Cockburn
Base of Operations: Rebel Base, Rural West Horn, Africa
Duration: Until Completion
Payment: ****
Description: Sister Cockburn, the self proclaimed commander of heaven and hell and the Nun of 27 Demons, is pulling that most classic of villainous ploys: supporting 3rd World rebels on the condition that their government tolerate her activities when they come into power. She is looking for several competent underlings to enforce her will upon and lead the scattered rebel cells that are not part of her main army.
Noteworthy Office Comments:
Pitch this to Daydream, they have much to gain working with a master of the unholy -Martin
Disregard Martin's comment. Sister Cockburn could easily destroy, absorb, or bind and incubus to her service. Too Risky for Daydream -Helen
(Redacted) -Morozov
Employer: Cletus 'Deinosuchus' Watson
Base of Operations: TBD, Likely in the swamps of Florida or Louisiana, USA
Duration: Until completion. Minimum 6 Months.
Payment: *****
Description: The legendary supervillain Deinosuchus is looking for super-powered underlings who like money and don't like asking questions. Contract includes an impressive signing bonus.
Noteworthy Office Comments:
Deinosuchus is a crazed cannibalistic loner. That he hires help is suspicious. Offer job to Daydream. He can't eat Stone Demon. Reject contract if Daydream refuses. -Morozov
Next you consider the the white folders. Jobs offered directly by the agency. There is a stigma attached to taking too many 'white folder' jobs. 'Agency Lifers' are seen as more interested in steady work than climbing the ranks and making the required connections to become a respectable supervillain. That said, the Agency always pays its people fairly, keeps safety in mind, provides proper supplies for the assigned job, and tolerates no overt discrimination against non-humans. None of these things are guaranteed when contracting for random supervillains.
Employer: EAEAS Internal Affairs Department
Base of Operations: Detroit, Michigan, USA
Duration: Until completion. Maximum 4 Months.
Payment: **(**)
Description: Last month we were approached by Colonel Smog, who was looking to hire henchmen for an operation in Detroit he refused to disclose. Negotiations stalled when Colonel Smog refused to pay the surcharge for undisclosed secret plans. During negotiations, Keven from Henchmen and Mook Headhunting, broke protocol and mentioned the Tomahawk Brothers (Lance, Drake, and Gunther) as good candidates for the job. Last week, we received word that the brothers relocated to Detroit. We suspect Colonel Smog cut the EAEAS out of the equation, and hired the brothers directly.
We are looking for an Underling Level Employee to investigate, and if our suspicions are correct, punish the Colonel and the Brothers. Minimal suitable punishment would be rendering whatever Colonel Smog is up to a complete failure, and the death of at least one brother.
Noteworthy Office Comments:
Daydream, if you are reading this, should you take this job, half your paycheck will be withheld. The church you work out of will be converted into a command post that meets minimum agency standards. The conversion will be worth much more than the withheld money -Helen
Employer: EAEAS Logistics
Base of Operations: EAEAS Western European Air Command, Heathrow Airport, London, UK
Duration: Until completion.
Payment: ***(**)
Description: In addition to our headhunting services, Sister Cockburn has also hired the Agency to handle supply and logistics for her African project, as she feels she lacks the skill to take responsibility for such things on her own.
We are looking for an Underling to take point on this operation. Your primary duty will be to secure high value flights shuttling gold, arms, and supplies between Agency Vaults in Western Europe, Arms dealers in the Balkans and Middle East, and Sister Cockburns forces in Africa. Combat ability is a must - these supply flights are popular targets for wannabe heroes and villains looking to make a quick buck at the expense of their peers. You will receive a significant hazard pay bonus if the job becomes violent at any point.
Noteworthy Office Comments:
Make sure Daydream sees this. Is good job for them. -Morozov
Just so you are aware, Daydream, Morozov is hoping you will be stupid and send Winged Incubi to attack these flights so he can get you in trouble. Please redact this note before returning the folder to him -Martin
You consider the offers. Morozov implied that you should select a job today... but of course it would be fun to piss him off by delaying.
Even if you do intend to select today, there is no harm in asking some questions first. On paper, it is Morozov's job to address questions and concerns regarding the contracts offered to underlings, but if you don't care to deal with him you could seek out Helen or Martin, the other two members of his department who left notes in the folders.
You are fairly sure Helen is the receptionist sitting at the desk in front of you, who showed you into Comrade Morozov's office earlier. You are less positive about Martin, but think he might be that lanky 9-5 looking geek who is usually hanging around the executive level water cooler.