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[Fish Preferred]

Unique demons, necromancers, and other powerful beings have a chance of corrupting your saves as you play. This may result in copies of them appearing in different worldgens and covering every tile with slade and/or zombies and/or forgotten beasts. Next, they alter the raws to give themselves unlimited power. Once they've taken over all of your files, they will overwrite Dwarf Fortress.exe and use it to crank out malware that inserts pictures of fluffy wamblers into every application and propagates them through any network it can find.

[Criperum]

Df now connects all your saves in one using portals. You can move between them in adv and fortress modes. If you go to the world without magic you'll never go back. All effects from different worlds will leak between each other and let creatures travel back and forth ( hello witcher saga).

[BigUglyWorm]

DF now periodically reminds you of how long you've been playing, and offers gentle reminders to take periodic breaks.  After about 4 hours, it just saves and shuts down automatically, and if you try to reopen it, it locks you out for 24 hours.

"You've played enough today.  Take a break and go outside!"
"THERE'S NOTHING FOR ME OUT THERE!  I CAN'T MICROMANAGE REAL LIFE!"
""
"Please...just one more pump stack...and a few extra bedrooms...please...it wasn't evEN SYMMETRICAL YET YOU FU--"

[Criperum]

4 hours? What a noob

[Fish Preferred]

4 hours? What a noob

You know, you're right. It should be every 20 minutes, with the game still running in the background so when you get back to it, the fortress will have progressed through a whole 24 hours of gameplay without user input. Jobs can be automatically assigned based on predictive software, so you don't have to worry about your herbalists and fishermen loafing around indoors or your miners sitting on their picks when fresh adamantium veins are in sight. Weavers and clothiers will weave and clothe nonstop using anything they can find to ensure that your dwarves are well dressed, and of couse your broker will always get a fair price when buying large leather low boots and finely decorated arrows.

[Criperum]

The game is running completely automatically and at random time it allows a player to control random things for random timespan

[Kyubee]

in order to even reach the point where you have site level control, you have to control the civilization for the entirety of world gen, a la the Sid Meier's civilization games... On Diety level. If you somehow do good, you get adequate to good start options, but the worse you do, the worse off your dwarves will be at the start. if you fail heavily, you wont even get to embark. Oh, every game of Civ takes multiple real world years to "Win", which is the best scenario for embarkation.

[delphonso]

DF available on Steam.

[Criperum]

Console exclusive

[neutrino431]

Dwarf Fortress is Epic Games Store exclusive

[methylatedspirit]

All future releases of Dwarf Fortress are now paid, and are exclusive to the only Blockbuster in the world. To sell it there, DF is burned onto DVDs which then get stuffed into the cases of random movies. Of course, no employee there knows which ones contain DF, so it's basically a lootbox with two possible outcomes: DF or no DF.

[neutrino431]

Dwarf Fortress Mobile, now with LootCoffers, a brand new cartoony tileset, ads, removal of gore (for the kids), and wait times for construction that can be sped up with DwarfBux.

[Eric Blank]

Also, you have to buy migrant waves. But you dont get any guarantee that the dwarves are legendary cheesemakers

[Criperum]

Economy is back to df but... You cannot make coins. You buy them in Toady Store for rl money. You give them to dwarves so they can actually live. You pay for migrants, caravans, protection from enemies, tantrums etc.

[BigUglyWorm]

Embarkation is now on a one month IRL cooldown timer that can be reset immediately by wiring ToadyOne twenty bucks.  Don't like your starting location?  Embarked into the mouth of a volcano? Better cough up.