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Author Topic: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 2: God Willing]  (Read 5981 times)

Fluffe9911

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 0: This Time With Feeling]
« Reply #30 on: May 17, 2018, 06:30:58 am »

Travel around in my caravan put on my robes and convince people I'm the resurrection of jesus possibly use that dog combining thing as proof cause I don't want to kill myself yet


I mean come on I can't not take advantage of this
« Last Edit: May 17, 2018, 06:35:21 am by Fluffe9911 »
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DolosusDoleus

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 0: This Time With Feeling]
« Reply #31 on: May 17, 2018, 07:04:21 am »

Shit. I accidentally labeled NRDL’s sheet as belonging to NAV...

Sorry about that NRDL. I’m gonna put you in the next update, and then we’re gonna have 9 players for the time being.

Can I lift the 1996 PW with my spinach strength?

Indeed. If Popeye could lift it, you can lift it too.
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Does that make scientific sense? No? Well it's Earth IV and he's a giant crocodile-man. Use your imagination.
Ongoing Forum Thingamajiggers:
Wikipedia Wars: Revengance

Hotfire90

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 0: This Time With Feeling]
« Reply #32 on: May 17, 2018, 07:12:48 am »

Can I lift the 1996 PW with my spinach strength?

Indeed. If Popeye could lift it, you can lift it too.
Perfect.

Eat my spinach and throw the 1996 PW at Puppyguard. Mr. Plinkett will grab her pistol.
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NRDL

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 0: This Time With Feeling]
« Reply #33 on: May 17, 2018, 05:49:55 pm »

Get in my biplane, take to the skies, start strafing people with gunfire.
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GOD DAMN IT NRDL.
NRDL will roll a die and decide how sadistic and insane he's feeling well you do.

RoseHeart

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 0: This Time With Feeling]
« Reply #34 on: May 19, 2018, 10:44:38 am »

Sneak away and find some chumps to con into my fold for a mutiny of the facility...
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He who knows he has enough is rich. -Lao Tzu
Whenever you've got to make a hard decision, don't become somebody that you don't respect. -Dr. John
Power doesn't corrupt, power reveals. -Robert Caro

Person

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 0: This Time With Feeling]
« Reply #35 on: May 20, 2018, 09:01:17 am »

OH SHIT, someone actually got something like immortality? Now we just need a game actually set in Al Capone's jail cell. No one will expect it. Anyway put me in the wait list.
« Last Edit: May 20, 2018, 09:43:30 am by Person »
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Please don't let textbooks invade Bay12.
The Conquistadors only have the faintest idea of what the modern world is like when they are greeted by two hostile WWI Veterans riding on a giant potato; Welcome to 2016.

DolosusDoleus

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #36 on: May 21, 2018, 09:29:38 pm »

Turn 1: The Plot Thickens
12:01

Music: The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

Right out of the gate, The Two Eternities (whichever ones those may be) lunges at Puppyguard with the rage of a thousand Rajneeshees in order to grab her pistol! [7 v 7] However, Puppyguard deftly sidesteps the Argentinian wiki-warrior's lunge leaving The Two Eternities grabbing nothing but air!

Rockeater, being of a less aggressive, more business-focused mind, barks out a quick "Looking like a promising company, so let's help" before ducking into a nearby office in search of a job interview! After about a minute of running around the dusty industrial compound, she bursts into a low building labeled "Recruitment", in which sits an overall generic looking man. Upon closer inspection, it appears that this gentleman is sound asleep, as evidenced by his closed eyes, light snoring, and thin string of drool dripping out of his mouth and in between the keys of his keyboard.

Having just narrowly avoided being tackled by The Two Eternities, Puppyguard turns her pistol upon her assailant, eyes burning with righteous indignation! [9 v 3] Using her extensive police training, she swiftly directs three bullets right into The Two Eternities' shoulder blades, sending him sprawling on the ground!

Seeing the brutal display of police brutality unfolding in front of them, King Zultan makes a beeline away from the melee and straight into the closest building! Inside, he sees several workers wearing hazmat suits similar to his own, too focused on the assembly line in front of them to pay him any mind. With this reprieve from the action, he takes the time to scan the immediate area for something, anything that could count as a weapon. [Searching: 8] After a cursory glance, King Zultan sees a nail gun lying on a nearby table, which he quickly scoops up without anyone noticing!

Thinking along the same lines as Rockeater, NAV too runs away in search of a job, whilst screaming "Have fun killing each other. I have a job interview to get to!" However, while Rockeater was searching for a low-level job, NAV is looking to go straight to the top by obtaining an interview with Elon Musk himself! It doesn't take long for the Irish wiki-warrior to find Elon's private office, but unfortunately it appears that his way forward is blocked by a locked door and the keycard reader next to it. Looks like Mr. Musk is a big fan of personal security.

Clad in priestly garments, the immortal wiki-warrior known as Fluffee comes to the startling, if somewhat blasphemous, realization that they could easily convince some of the local workers that he is the second coming of Jesus Christ! Quickly hopping in his caravan, he quickly drives over to Gigafactory 1's communal dining facility, whereupon he begins proselytizing at the assorted workers! [Proselytizing: 1 + 2 (Theology)]. However, despite his fine usage of Christian language, the workers seem confused at best and outright enraged at worst, muttering and grumbling amongst themselves.

Squinting at the battle unraveling before them with the elderly man known as Mr. Plinkett, Hotfire quickly comes to a conclusion. After whispering into Mr. Plinkett's ear, he pulls a can of spinach out of his pocket and downs the whole thing in a single gulp! As his muscles grow to a cartoonishly large size, he swaggers over to the huge chunk of 1996 PW, lifts it up with a single arm, and and sends the 10 ton chunk of rock sailing through the air towards Puppyguard! [1 v 10] Despite the asteroid chunk's impressive size, or rather because of it, Hotfire has an extremely hard time actually getting the giant piece of rock anywhere near Puppyguard and instead misses her by at least 15 feet!

Not wishing to waste any time, NRDL hops into her antique biplane and takes to the skies! [Flying: 3] Or she would, anyway, if she actually managed to get the damn thing off the ground in the first place. Rather, the engine putters pathetically and the plane haphazardly lurches forward around 10 feet before grinding to a halt. How disappointing.

Finally there is roseheart, who sneakily sneaks away from the combat, ducking into yet another nearby building! (Gigafactory 1, as the name would suggest, is pretty big). Through the front door of this building lies a large open room, full of chairs, vending machines, and water coolers. Around one such water cooler in particular stand a group of six burly workers, having a conversation.


Spoiler: NRDL (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: NAV (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Puppyguard (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: King Zultan (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: roseheart (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: The_Two_Eternities (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Hotfire90 (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Fluffee9900 (click to show/hide)
Spoiler: Rockeater (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: May 21, 2018, 10:39:53 pm by DolosusDoleus »
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Does that make scientific sense? No? Well it's Earth IV and he's a giant crocodile-man. Use your imagination.
Ongoing Forum Thingamajiggers:
Wikipedia Wars: Revengance

Puppyguard

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #37 on: May 21, 2018, 10:31:08 pm »

Finish off The Two Eternities and escape to a nearby building.
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NRDL

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #38 on: May 21, 2018, 10:45:08 pm »

Try to start my plane again, this time saying prayers to the Holy Father to deliver me from this mechanical failure.
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GOD DAMN IT NRDL.
NRDL will roll a die and decide how sadistic and insane he's feeling well you do.

The_Two_Eternities

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #39 on: May 21, 2018, 11:07:33 pm »

Escape and head to a hospital.
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Yeah sorry, someone blew up a street in my state and took the internet down for multiple days with it.
This really happened. 2020 was wild.

Rockeater

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #40 on: May 21, 2018, 11:49:34 pm »

Wake the person up and demand to talk to his superior
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Damnit people, this is why I said to keep the truce. Because now everyone's ganging up on the cats.
Also, don't forget to contact your local Eldritch Being(s), so that they can help with our mission to destroy the universe.

Fluffe9911

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #41 on: May 22, 2018, 12:32:04 am »

Oh I see I most likely come off as insane huh here let me show you some proof

Try to do the Instantanious Breeding thing and other things Jesus would do to convince them I'm Jesus
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Hotfire90

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #42 on: May 22, 2018, 07:56:46 am »

Grab the 1996 PW and bash Puppyguard with it. Mr Plinkett will search for a cafeteria and acquire some spinach.
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King Zultan

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #43 on: May 22, 2018, 10:10:54 am »

Go further in to the factory and look for a melee weapon and be sure to grab any extra nails I see.
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The Lawyer opens a briefcase. It's full of lemons, the justice fruit only lawyers may touch.
Make sure not to step on any errant blood stains before we find our LIFE EXTINGUSHER.
but anyway, if you'll excuse me, I need to commit sebbaku.
Quote from: Leodanny
Can I have the sword when you’re done?

NAV

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Re: Wikipedia Wars: Recapitulation [Turn 1: The Plot Thickens]
« Reply #44 on: May 23, 2018, 10:34:30 am »

Knock on Elon's door.

Try using my incomprehensible foreigner charm to get Elon or another employee to let me in.
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Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.
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