Turn VI: Deli-Ver Us From Evil
Wily Wilson strides down the aisles of Wal-Mart, checking in at the aisle for cleaning supplies. Passing vacuums and bottles of various liquids, he finds a row of mops awaiting him. He picks up each of the metal-handled devices, experimentally swinging each like he was trying to find his signature weapon from a rack of polearms. In the end, he settles on a MightyMop(R) which has just the amount of weight and flexibility he was looking for.
Cal Ericson greets the creature, "G'morning. Or Afternoon, ma'am." Deb blinks her eyes a few times and continues to stare at him, saliva falling from her toothy mouth onto the floor. Cal urgently begins filling the backpack with those small discs of propane and their accompanying lighters. As he loads his pack, he hears Deb slowly creeping closer to him, her flip flops distinctively echoing against the tiled floor. [Agility: 1 vs 4] Cal books it with Deb hot on his tail. As he rounds the corner of the aisle, he trips over an errantly placed microwave and hits the ground on his stomach. Deb stands right over Cal, who believes that his life may indeed be over, but that's all she does, standing and chittering, and not taking any further action. Some of her spit lands on the backside of Cal's pants.
Lalli finds himself in the middle of an impromptu brawl in the Deli, and goes for whoever is closest which just so happens to be A. Bell Adams. [6 vs. 1] Lalli takes a step backward and thrusts an elbow back into Adams, who doesn't expect to have the brunt bony appendage smash straight into the center of his sternum. Adams slides backwards and drops to a knee, clutching his chest and suddenly out of breath. Lalli grabs Adams by the hair and holds his head back so that the front of his neck is exposed. Lalli raises his Baton high in the air; if this were a blade it would be an execution, but since it's just a baton, Lalli will settle for a mere crushed windpipe. [2 vs. 7-2(Wind-Knocked-Out-Of)] Before the baton comes down, Adams whips his leash around and smacks Lalli across the face with it, causing the attacker to stagger (but no injuries besides some very temporary pain) and giving Adams enough time to get back up and stagger away.
Nix backs up against the display case for the Deli as Kyle draws near. Nix reaches for his Switchblade and finds nothing, Kyle must have taken it while he was unconscious. He looks around for an improvised weapon, [Instant Weapon Improvisation: 8] and grabs a chunk of Frozen Lamb Leg from a nearby rack. Better than nothing, right? These things have been used for murder before, after all.
A. Bell Adams disengages from Lalli while that man reels in pain from a bitch-slap-via-leash and closes in on Kyle from the rear. Still coughing, Adams gets close enough to bring his Switchblade down, and then looks at his empty hand. Oh yeah, he never picked that up from the fight earlier. Well, he's too close to Kyle now to go all the way down the floor, so he settles for beating Kyle over the head with the leash. [3-2(Winded) vs. 1] Adams raises the leash into the air and then buckles at the waist, heaving for air. Kyle turns around and blinks, too confused to muster up any sort of counter move. Adams looks up, sees Kyle staring at him, and lunges forward with an overhand-leash swing, [4-2(Winded) vs. 6] and Kyle simply steps out of the way of the telegraphed attack. Adams stumbles into the Deli display case, props himself above it and catches his breath finally, returning to a normal pace of inhalation. His sternum still hurts though.
After dealing with the attack (really more of a nuisance) of Adams, Kyle turns back towards Nix, planning to extract revenge as his opponent cowers with a frozen leg of lamb.
"Let's turn this robbery into a murder then!" If Kyle had a ski mask, he would definitely put it on right now. [8 vs. 1] Kyle jams the Can of Mace in Nix's face and pulls down the trigger. With his back against the glass, Nix has nowhere to move to, and the lamb leg does nothing to deflect a spray of vicious pepper. The fiery substance bakes Nix's eyes, face and bare chest. Nix drops the lamb leg and then to his hands and knees, sounding like he's coughing his lungs out as he goes blind for the moment under the effects of a devastating spray.
With the first kill under his belt, Timothy looks to expand his list. As he lurks around the store looking for weak prey, a box of text appears in front of him:
You can get a new ability now, you leveled up. That's kind of the point of this. Right, free ability. Keeping that in mind, Tim walks into the Deli where everything is popping off. Everyone looks pretty good, except Nix who is basically getting incapacitated. Nix is surrounded by Kyle however, so Tim would have to get through Kyle anyways. Plus, Kyle is probably the second next weakest person, as Tim can see that the boy's been poked something fierce. Tim gets low and starts crouch-walking at Kyle, knives drawn. [Stealth: 2 vs. 10] Tim gets real close, and just as he's ready to stab Kyle through both of the kidneys, Kyle reacts lightning fast and gives Tim a quick boot to the chest that knocks him flat on his back. [8 vs. 7-2(Grounded)] Kyle follows this up with a quick kick to the gut that makes Tim feel uneasy. Tim gets up on his knees, and Kyle prepares to whack him in the face, [9 vs. 1] when Kyle jams both of his knives straight into Kyle's thighs. Kyle falls backwards against the Deli display case, his legs failing him, as Tim gets back on his feet. Kyle mutters something about Tim being a dick before two blades go through both sides of his neck. Kyle's body goes limp, still leaning on the diagonal display case, still in a semi-upright sitting position.
Timothy has slain Kyle Johnson. He upgrades to Level 2.John Shepard spawns in the central parking lot where Frankie Dovens continues hit golf balls into the distance while orchestrating Kendrick Lamar.
Jack Black wheels his over to the Deli, overlooking all of the carnage. "Really?
REALLY?!"
Name: Jack Black the Janitor
Level: 3
Status: Normal
Inventory: Mop, First Aid Kit
Abilities:
? - Level 1
? - Level 2
Name: Frankie Dovens
Level: 4
Status: Normal
Inventory: Golf Club, Golf Balls
Abilities:
? - Level 3
? - Level 1
Name: Deb
Level: 6
Status: Normal
Inventory:
Abilities:
? - Level 3
? - Level 3
Name: Lalli (AoshimaMichio)
Level: 0
Status: Normal
Inventory: Folding Baton.
Abilities:
Name: A. Bell Adams (Sl4cker)
Level: 0
Status: Sternum Bruised
Inventory: Large Slip Leash
Abilities:
Name: Timothy (FallacyofUrist)
Level: 1
Status: Left Rear Ankle Bruised, Stomach Bruised
Inventory: 2 Switchblades
Abilities:
Name: Nix (NRDL)
Level: 0
Status: Shirtless, Broken Nose, Right Cheek Bruised, Skull/Upper Back Bruised, Blinded: 1 (Can't Attack, -2 All)
Inventory:
Abilities:
Name: Cal Ericson (Strider03)
Level:0
Status: Normal
Inventory: Switchblade, Painkillers (8/8), Pocket Lighter (100%), Bottle of Isopropyl Alcohol, Survival Backpack, 6 Small Propane Cans, 4 Propane Lighters
Abilities:
Name: Leeeeeeeeroy Jenkins!!!!! (TheBiggerFish)
Level: 0
Status: Normal
Inventory: Folding Baton
Abilities:
Name: Wily Wilson (Yottawhat)
Level: 0
Status Normal
Inventory: Pepper Spray, Metal Mop
Abilities:
Name: John Shepard (S34N1C)
Level: 0
Status: Normal
Inventory: Pepper Spray
Abilities:
Author
Topic: An Exercise in Asinine Violence [Announcement/Conclusion] (Read 6276 times)