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Author Topic: SPAMKINGDOM+: GAME OVER  (Read 113607 times)

birdy51

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #105 on: March 06, 2017, 01:46:45 pm »

Frankly, Beren had it coming, the cowardly little rat. Tasarina is the best wife.
Pretty sure we're dealing with a different Beren here. It's like 60 years since the fall of Luathbas. It's probably his grandson.

Eh, screw his descendants too. The Kiwi Kingdom is worse than the Damadians. At least with them you know what you're getting.
« Last Edit: March 06, 2017, 01:57:49 pm by birdy51 »
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BIRDS.

Also started a Let's Play, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duelists of the Roses

Criptfeind

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #106 on: March 06, 2017, 01:50:01 pm »

A

Better to be poisoned to death than to give a Kiki what he wants.
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Imic

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #107 on: March 06, 2017, 01:51:54 pm »

B
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Quote from: smyttysmyth
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Tiruin

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #108 on: March 06, 2017, 02:14:18 pm »

What did I tell you? Marrying either of those two was going to be a bad idea. We should've held out for a wife who wouldn't get us tied up in a religious/political kerfuffle.

Anyway. If our wife is in the habit of poisoning people, it'd be nice to know before we wake up dead.
On the other hand, our wife might not be too pleased if we doubt her innocence. Perhaps we should just trust her? And just be careful about smelling any flowers she brings us.

A
Doesn't this all mean "B" instead of "A" first, since we seem quite the meticulous fellow? :P

B
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #109 on: March 06, 2017, 03:07:00 pm »

aaaaa
bbbb

Maybe two more votes or so? :vc
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Kashyyk

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #110 on: March 06, 2017, 03:09:11 pm »

A

Although we could reject him after he provides what ever legal documents he has, we'll lose more face than just dismissing him now.
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #111 on: March 06, 2017, 03:30:09 pm »

You tell him to be gone and don't accuse your wife of such things.

She later thanks you, a lot.

957 AD, Midwinter

First loads of polished malachite and refined copper and its precious alloys arrive at the Treasury! These fine objects will boost your wealth greatly.

957 AD, Late Winter

Newest censuses from the rural areas show that many children were born this year, especially in autumn and winter; this means that your population increases!

957 AD, End of the Year

While you're looking through the window at the winter landscape, the advisor shows up with Scrolls of Kingdom Status in his hands.

Happiness: 4
Population: 4
Economy: 4
Army: 4

All these look quite nic-

"My liege, I have to remind you that according to the Treaty of Irem from year 908, we're obliged to pay a tribute to the Kings of Dahnia every five years. The next tribute is due next winter. Please be mindful of that."

Always there's something to ruin your mood.

958 AD, Spring

Your wife gives birth to another boy! She names him 'Avrast'.

Few days later, on a particularily cold morning, two envoys appear at the gates of your Palace. One is from the King Amabarn II of the Kiwi Kingdom, and the other is from the Tisilenteliya, the elven forest kingdom in the far northwest.

A) Time to talk with the obnoxious Kiwi once again, huh?
B) Let's hear the pointy-eared diplomat first.
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Harry Baldman

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #112 on: March 06, 2017, 03:49:28 pm »

Elves! Luckily we're not blood-related to any of their rebels. I hear there was a bit of trouble a while back.

B!
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #113 on: March 06, 2017, 04:08:01 pm »

Elves! Luckily we're not blood-related

Houlandin III was 1/2 elf, Igrid was 1/4 elf, Ainach was 1/8 elf, cowardly grandfather 1/16, sickly father 1/32 so that makes Merachd 1/64 elf.

**~~The More You Know~~**
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

Harry Baldman

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #114 on: March 06, 2017, 04:11:08 pm »

Oh shit, I missed that we're technically an elf-descended Houlandine as opposed to some random second or third cousin. That's a bit of a pickle.

Nevertheless, fuck the Kiwis.
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NUKE9.13

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #115 on: March 06, 2017, 04:11:52 pm »

Elves! Luckily we're not blood-related

Houlandin III was 1/2 elf, Igrid was 1/4 elf, Ainach was 1/8 elf, cowardly grandfather 1/16, sickly father 1/32 so that makes Merachd 1/64 elf.

**~~The More You Know~~**
So you're saying its an elven assassin, come to finish the job of wiping us out.
...
Well, we won't have to deal with any Kiwi bullshit if we're dead, so lets see the elf first.

B
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Long Live United Forenia!

heydude6

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #116 on: March 06, 2017, 04:13:03 pm »

This is gonna suck either way. Either the Kiwi's assassinate us or the elves do. I'm assuming it's not possible to abstain?
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #117 on: March 06, 2017, 04:14:33 pm »

Nevertheless, fuck the Kiwis.

Kiwis are also family because Beren the Bard married one of the 'nieces', making his heir Eitwelf and Merachd's cowardly grandfather... cousins of some sort. Third cousins?

Definitely a tiny fraction of relation but still relation nonetheless!

* Haspen lacks enough fingers to go deep math on this v;
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.

birdy51

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #118 on: March 06, 2017, 04:16:41 pm »

B.

Also, I'm thinking the palace could use an expansion to the garden. Flowers would really liven up the palace...
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Haspen

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Re: SPAMKINGDOM+: Grand Duke Merachd of Tven!
« Reply #119 on: March 06, 2017, 04:33:16 pm »

You agree to see the elf first.

The pointy-eared, pale human enters your throne room almost noiselessly, wearing a dark green cloak that covers all but his pointy, wooden shoes. He bows with his arms wide.

"Tembar! Greetings to human Duke of Tven, may the sun and moon smile upon you wherever you go. I am Anataife of Tisilenteliya, and I bring an offer from my mother and one of the wives of our wise king! He offers to share the magical items of our make with you if you promise to become an enemy of the Dwarves, who profit and grow stronger each day thanks to a gem and metal trade with some distant kingdom we only know the name of - Gubta. The Dwarven fortified city of Ankurvat, east of the Kiwis, is a large trade hub of theirs and would cause them much grief and loss if it were to fall." After a moment of thinking, you decide to...

A) Ask what kind of items his people are offering, and they better be some good ones too.
B) Reject a ridiculous idea to get involved in a racial war between two peoples who don't even live amongst your subjects.
C) Reject his offer, and sometime later have a messenger sent to Ankurvat, informing the Dwarves that Elves are plotting to strike the city with someone's help.
« Last Edit: March 06, 2017, 04:35:09 pm by Haspen »
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SigFlags!
Quote from: Draignean@Spamkingdom+
Truly, we have the most uniquely talented spy network in all existence.
Quote from: mightymushroom@Spamkingdom#
Please tell me the Royal Physician didn't go to the same college as the Spymaster.
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