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Author Topic: Doc Helgoland's Asylum for the Politically American: T+0  (Read 1413877 times)

scriver

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #330 on: July 15, 2016, 10:22:52 am »

That's actually wrong. First of all, Wendish Crusade took place nowhere near Poland and by that time Poland was already Christian (not that Germans cared much, but we kicked their asses back every time because in this case Deus clearly didin't Vult)... not to mention that there was literally Polish detachment taking part in that one.

For some indiscernible reason the same thing happened in Sweden. The Norwegian kings thought it much more fitting to Crusade in the richer, already Christian, parts rather than the poorer, pagan regions.

Norwegians, man.
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Sheb

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #331 on: July 15, 2016, 10:27:03 am »

The Crusades are quite nice to study (I've got a couple nice books laying around on the subject I can recommend.) I really love the inflation of indulgence over time as they got offered for more and more things.
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

Kot

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #332 on: July 15, 2016, 11:08:28 am »

That's actually wrong. First of all, Wendish Crusade took place nowhere near Poland and by that time Poland was already Christian (not that Germans cared much, but we kicked their asses back every time because in this case Deus clearly didin't Vult)... not to mention that there was literally Polish detachment taking part in that one.

For some indiscernible reason the same thing happened in Sweden. The Norwegian kings thought it much more fitting to Crusade in the richer, already Christian, parts rather than the poorer, pagan regions.

Norwegians, man.
I could see those "richer, Christian parts" still being partially Pagan though. Wendish Crusades went straight through middle of Germany and up until, like, Reformation people there were scared shitless of secret pagans hiding in forests. Poland was not saint either and only in like XIIIth or XIVth century Christianity actually became the dominant religion. Obviously, in most cases it was just bunch of peasants mixing folklore and Christian beliefs but it gave excuses to people like Teutonic Knights (or Norwegians) to raid and be annoying dicks. I imagine it would be only worse in Sweden/Norway/Whenever because of the distances and remoteness of villages. Hell, IIRC, there were actual (as in, unbroken line of worship since like prehistory, not some neo-pagan wannabes) pagans in Finland in XIXth century even.

ITT: Europe.
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scriver

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #333 on: July 15, 2016, 11:35:17 am »

I could see those "richer, Christian parts" still being partially Pagan though.

Some of these rich areas were also the ones that self-christianised and converted from the roots rather than from the crown, though. Really old churches in southern Sweden are built like small keeps or watchtowers, even, so that the Christians could flee there and defend themselves when crusaders came to baptize the area again.

Quote
ITT: Europe

They can take it :v
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Max™

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #334 on: July 15, 2016, 11:47:08 am »

Hey, we might need to keep track of crusade initiation warning signs over here, do us good to brush up on the history again.

Also, is Britbongland still part of Europe until it goes through?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
IT BE SIX BONG!
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Kot

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #335 on: July 15, 2016, 12:19:59 pm »

I am pretty sure Britbongoland is, was and will always be an island colony of Roman Empire.
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Kot finishes his morning routine in the same way he always does, by burning a scale replica of Saint Basil's Cathedral on the windowsill.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #336 on: July 15, 2016, 12:41:29 pm »

gtfo Roman Empire will never be made great again, rip byzantin

mainiac

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #337 on: July 15, 2016, 12:54:51 pm »

I am pretty sure Britbongoland is, was and will always be an island colony of Roman Empire.

The romans wrote them a letter saying to fuck off.
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mainiac is always a little sarcastic, at least.

Kot

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #338 on: July 15, 2016, 12:56:23 pm »

In hindsight I am inclined to claim that was the best decision they ever made.
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Kot finishes his morning routine in the same way he always does, by burning a scale replica of Saint Basil's Cathedral on the windowsill.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #339 on: July 15, 2016, 01:16:19 pm »

Quote
What happened to Roman Britain?
From the 2nd century A.D. Roman Britain found itself under attack from people who lived outside the Roman borders. The Romans thought these people were not civilised and called them barbarians. The Roman army and navy defended Britain.

By the 5th century A.D. barbarian tribes were attacking other parts of the Roman Emperor Honorius decided that the Roman legions in Britain were needed elsewhere. He sent a letter to the people of Britain telling them the soldiers had to leave. They must fight the Anglo-Saxons and invaders on their own. In AD 410 the last Romans left.
Pulling an Iraq lol
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
End of Romanaboos :(

RedKing

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #340 on: July 15, 2016, 01:49:05 pm »

Git yer filthy Eurotrash history out of the Murrica thread.

We Amerexited for a reason, you know (hint: free trade and cheap tea)
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Kot

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #341 on: July 15, 2016, 01:54:29 pm »

There is no such thing as America.
There are only European colonies.
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Max™

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #342 on: July 15, 2016, 01:59:15 pm »

This is only technically true, America is in a superposition of FREEDOM and TEATIME until observed directly by the queen herself.
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RedKing

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #343 on: July 15, 2016, 02:00:29 pm »

There is no such thing as America.
There are only European colonies.

u wot m8
ill have you know we Americans are trained in gorilla warfare (especially the southern ones) and have an arsenal bigger than most of those European "countries" you're talking about
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Remember, knowledge is power. The power to make other people feel stupid.
Quote from: Neil DeGrasse Tyson
Science is like an inoculation against charlatans who would have you believe whatever it is they tell you.

KingofstarrySkies

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Re: Ameripol\{RK, mainiac}
« Reply #344 on: July 15, 2016, 02:01:23 pm »

>gorilla warfare
FIRE THE BANANAS
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