"The gate of Rottweil was a gate like any other. Perhaps not worth mentioning at all, if it weren't for the fact that it was a literal gate which opened up to greater adventures. Beyond that... well, I'm sure you could get a gate much the same now and for much cheaper."This is the game's copy protection. These symbols are all over the history section of the manual and you have to look them up for use here. Not sure why they bothered since you'd probably be unable to do much of anything without the manual even if the copy protection wasn't there.
"The lands surrounding Rottweil were as they still are: modest farmlands and tree-laden mountains." "Although," the storyteller gestures to a great gathering of tents, "people like them certainly weren't common."
"Soldiers were not common in those days?" "If you call those men soldiers, I'm terrified to know what you call mercenaries. But no, there were not many "soldiers". The Emperors were rarely strong men in will, body, or purse; and a office such as that tends to drain all three." "This isn't a tale of the inadequacies of the Empire, however so let's return to the quest of our heroes." "Basel was their destination, as apparently all things vile converged on the town. Miners had been driven out by dwarfs, and the peasants had been driven out by a dragon." "Supposedly anyway. The notices weren't specific about the whereabouts of the dragon. "West" was the most they could get out of anyone they asked. Travel 2/
L'Homme Armé (First bit I'm certain is L'Homme, I believe the rest is not. Appropriate music nonetheless.)
"So they explored almost every mountain from the Black Forest to the Alps. Suffice it to say that there was naught in those mountains besides your average bands of deserters." "However, as they collected their spoils of war they realized something: normal bandits couldn't afford quality scale or chainmail, so who could've funded them?" "With a noble lord within viewing distance, it didn't take long for them to make assumptions and begin marching." "The castle of Wazenau was a miserable looking thing to say the least. The walls were decayed to the point of uselessness and the gate was jarred open in fear of weak chains snapping it shut forever. Outwardly at least it did not seem the home of a rich raubritter." "The peasantry of Wazenau did not seem the peasantry of a raubritter either." "So, with some degree of uncertainty, they approached the local lord and requested for a audience." "He fulfilled this request with enthusiasm, as he himself was curious about the nature of these "Heroes of Rottweil." " "A hearty night of conversation later and they realized that this lord was a just lord. Perhaps not a wealthy lord, but a just one. So, having found little evidence of dragons, they asked for a task." "He, however, had neither a task to be give nor the money to pay for said non-existent task. What he did have was a bastard son who just so happened to be the foreman of the mine that the dwarfs invaded, and he certainly had heroic work to be done."
"A just lord with a bastard child? Explain to me how those two things coincide." "Well, he was just to his vassals, perhaps not to his wife. Lady Wazenau is never mentioned in any tale I've heard so maybe she never existed in the first place." "Without much thought, they accepted the Lord's recommendation and set out for Basel at sunrise."There was more to the old ruin, but I forgot to screenshot it. Or I didn't screenshot it on purpose, who knows.
"The most exciting thing that can be said about the trek to the Basel is that The Frank once drank too much ale and ended a cult or two with his impressive flailing." "He eliminated entire cults just by shaking his maul about?
"These cults had more in common with tax revolts then the great Greek cults of old. It was not a particularly hard task to reinstate the fear of God into them.
"Little has to be said of their arrival at the Basel Mines. The mines themselves were mundane and the foreman made little argument after being told of his father's recommendation." "Therefore there was nothing stopping them from entering the mines and assailing dwarfs." "So they assailed dwarfs and kobolds. Many, many dwarfs and kobolds." "They just assailed dwarfs and kobolds? No wounds? No deaths?
Sweet, sweet saint calling.
"Yes, that's exactly what happened. Dwarfs and kobolds are quite fragile things when it comes down to it. The previously mentioned godly favor and sheer force of will helped too." "Supposedly the dwarfs attempted to stop them by using a pit trap and the escaped from it by making a "human pyramid." Seems more likely to me that they just used a potion." "The potions they received from the dwarfs storage that is. One might think they would put magical locks on such a thing, but apparently the dwarfs didn't deem it necessary."
"Did Jack have an opinion on valuable potions being used for such things?"
"The only words Jack had on the matter were "Cyary iimuvidovour Loryi, Lletunai."
"Thank you for your answer?"
"What they did deem necessary was installing a gnome door to guard the lower mines. How they did this in only a matter of months, we'll never know." "What exactly is a gnome door? What makes it different from any other door? Is it shaped like a gnome or some such?" "No it is a normal door except instead of being opened by keys, gnome doors are opened after whoever is trying to open successfully solves a puzzle of some sort." "What the puzzle or its solution was for this door or the other gnome doors, I do not know. What I do know is that they eventually managed to open it." "Or that Dvalin the Dwarf King opened it. It is far from an important detail." "What is an important detail is that Dvalin offered to leave the mine if they provided a Empire's worth of potions." "Which they didn't provide, as trusting a dwarf is simply folly.' "Instead they took the much more definite path of assaulting him. It went as well as you might expect assaulting a Dwarf King might go; his magics confused them and soon they were surrounded by gnomes and kobolds!" "Were these war gnomes or something similar? I can't imagine the garden variety would fare well in battle." "These were gnomes of rock and soil, not grass and flower. The best way to explain their appearance would be that of a perfectly cubicle oven, with teeth." "That's all they are? How does a living oven inspire terror in anyone?" "Presumably by being heavy enough and agile enough to crush a man in a single charge." "Which doesn't particularly help them when their surrounded by trained fighters." "Meaning our heroes were victorious and were able to continue...
"...into the spider pits. King Dvalin was known for his love of giant spiders, even if they weren't particularly effective guards of his treasure." "Excuse me? How can an army giant spiders be ineffective?" "By having fangs unable to penetrate even chainmail and a hide that couldn't stop a dagger." "As you might imagine, the spider pits were full of spiders and little else so when they found a gnome door they did not hesitate in opening it. "Or hesitate in threatening Dvalin once again and slaying his guards once again." "If these dwarfs, kobolds, and gnomes were so weak why didn't the Count of Basel just storm the place?" "Why didn't the Count of Basel eliminate the dragon prowling his countryside? I would imagine it was because he was an inadequate leader who kept his throne only because his ancestors willed it." "Much the same can be said of Dvalin the Fool King. The closest he ever came to making something of value was in ordering the construction of a well from which dwarf spirits could be brought forth." "The well didn't give him the will to keep those spirits doing anything long-term, however. He did get quite an elaborate series of underground waterfalls from it though. I" "After personally exterminating the gnomish hordes of the Dwarf King, our heroes finally approached Dvalin's treasure room." "The place was far from impressive. The only real decoration was the waterfall, if you could even call the grate that jutted out of the wall that, and the walls were jagged from poor chiseling. Likelihood is that Dvalin crafted the room himself." "The jagged edges of the room and the chest that it contained, as you can imagine, made breaking the thing open and acquiring his heirlooms much easier." "Dvalin's treasures were uninspiring to say the least. No swords greased with the blood of a god, no shields crafted from rogue sea-serpents, just simple jeweled scepters and the like." "Having gained too little to leave, they renewed their search for the dwarf king. Quite a number number of dwarfs attempted to stop their expedition, some more successful then others. "The more successful being one group of roughly half a dozen dwarfs held their ground particularly well through tactical use of potions and general fortitude. If they hadn't run out of potions, well, I would be telling another tale!" "With the royal guard destroyed, our heroes advanced on the last gnome door." "And behind it was, once again, Dvalin." "Who, with a bit of convincing word use from The Frank, surrendered his kingdom for the return of his treasure." "That's it? No struggle at all? If he was going to surrender, why didn't he surrender earlier?"
"Because his royal guard was still alive? It has already been made clear that he didn't care for his subjects all that much." "Nor was he a dwarf of great will, even considering the natural weaknesses of their kind." "As you might expect, the miners rejoiced at the news of the Dwarf King's exile and gave the party all that they could spare. "All that they could spare being a knight's fortune of alchemical ingredients, and, of course, the spreading of their good name all across the county of Basel. "*Only* the county of Basel?" "Peasants aren't exactly known for their vast influence. "Nor are alchemists known for their virtues." "And dragons are not known for either, so let me tell you what they are known for..."
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Topic: Let's Eventually Play Darklands Part 2: Catholic-Consuming, Cranky, Cathars (Read 23688 times)