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Author Topic: The friendly and polite Europe related terrible jokes thread  (Read 1069157 times)

Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8025 on: May 08, 2018, 08:04:54 pm »

Dutchcops should train UScops in de-escalation (and situational awareness. Dutch cops don't mistake mobile phones for guns).
Dutch cops don't have surface to air missiles

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8026 on: May 09, 2018, 06:29:44 am »

In Rome, two passenger busses exploded in the city centre. No one panicked or even flinched.
Romans are used to their busses exploding because of lack of maintenance.
So yeah, even when two busses explode in one day, Romans don't think 'terrorists attack', they think 'atac', which is the name of the bus company.

And indeed, it was no terrorist attack. It was just two poorly maintained busses catching fire and exploding. Through quick action of the bus drivers, the passengers were evacuated from the busses before they exploded. Only one woman needed treatment at a hospital.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8027 on: May 09, 2018, 06:33:39 am »

In Rome, two passenger busses exploded in the city centre. No one panicked or even flinched.
Romans are used to their busses exploding because of lack of maintenance.
So yeah, even when two busses explode in one day, Romans don't think 'terrorists attack', they think 'atac', which is the name of the bus company.

And indeed, it was no terrorist attack. It was just two poorly maintained busses catching fire and exploding. Through quick action of the bus drivers, the passengers were evacuated from the busses before they exploded. Only one woman needed treatment at a hospital.
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Kagus

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8028 on: May 12, 2018, 07:43:36 pm »

So this year on our Constitution Day (which is a pretty big deal for Norskies. Think July 4th but with more obligatory dresses and standing around being patriotic), the powers that be have seen fit to impose a fine for anyone waving a flag that isn't the Norwegian flag. The fine, 4500NOK, is equivalent to a little over $560 US.

This also goes for people waving another flag in addition to a Norwegian flag, not just those who swap out the Norwegian flag with something else.


While I do feel that some people are kind of missing the point of Norwegian Constitution Day, I also feel that specifically banning the flags of other countries is really not going to accomplish anything worthwhile.

Hell, the ultra-rare extranational flag that shows up in the parades here is usually an item of enthusiastic interest, because it helps break up the crushing monotony of having to stand there and wait through the entire fucking parade of every school in the county marching all of their kids grades 1-9 in order down a narrow street, just because you're vaguely related to someone who has a kid walking in the parade...

MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8029 on: May 12, 2018, 07:56:42 pm »

Flag restrictions among European countries were a shock to me when I started actually reading up on them. While a fair few nations permit burning one's own flag, virtually all of them criminalize burning the flags of other nations, and there are plenty who stand at a Full Nationalism of flag-related prohibitions.

Hilarious, in light of certain criticisms and assumptions about US flag law.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8030 on: May 12, 2018, 08:57:10 pm »

So this year on our Constitution Day (which is a pretty big deal for Norskies. Think July 4th but with more obligatory dresses and standing around being patriotic), the powers that be have seen fit to impose a fine for anyone waving a flag that isn't the Norwegian flag. The fine, 4500NOK, is equivalent to a little over $560 US.

This also goes for people waving another flag in addition to a Norwegian flag, not just those who swap out the Norwegian flag with something else.


While I do feel that some people are kind of missing the point of Norwegian Constitution Day, I also feel that specifically banning the flags of other countries is really not going to accomplish anything worthwhile.

Hell, the ultra-rare extranational flag that shows up in the parades here is usually an item of enthusiastic interest, because it helps break up the crushing monotony of having to stand there and wait through the entire fucking parade of every school in the county marching all of their kids grades 1-9 in order down a narrow street, just because you're vaguely related to someone who has a kid walking in the parade...
Unenforceable law, if it only applies to flags, as you need only apply flaggage to non "flag" items

smjjames

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8031 on: May 12, 2018, 10:09:32 pm »

Flag restrictions among European countries were a shock to me when I started actually reading up on them. While a fair few nations permit burning one's own flag, virtually all of them criminalize burning the flags of other nations, and there are plenty who stand at a Full Nationalism of flag-related prohibitions.

Hilarious, in light of certain criticisms and assumptions about US flag law.

And apparently the proper way to dispose of an old Danish flag is to burn it.

Also, it should surprise no one that there are people who want to outlaw flag burning (of the US flag anyway) or (on the more extreme end) equate it to treason, but it’s considered free speech, so, it’s unlikely to happen here.
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ChairmanPoo

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8032 on: May 13, 2018, 02:50:50 am »

Flag restrictions among European countries were a shock to me when I started actually reading up on them. While a fair few nations permit burning one's own flag, virtually all of them criminalize burning the flags of other nations, and there are plenty who stand at a Full Nationalism of flag-related prohibitions.

Hilarious, in light of certain criticisms and assumptions about US flag law.
I can tell you that in Spain there has been a severe involution in civil liberties in the last ten years. Concerning flags, it didnt use to be illegal before 2015.

Oddly enough there have been far more trials of people accused of "defending terrorism" than in the 20 years prior (when the domestic terrorists were actually active).  I dont feel this is going to leas anywhere happy. The trend is to emulate Erdogan.
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Reelya

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8033 on: May 14, 2018, 02:44:15 am »

Quote
The trend is to emulate Erdogan.

Don't be saying that, the mandatory sentence for accusing the government of emulating Erdogan is 10 years.

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8034 on: May 14, 2018, 02:49:47 am »

Quote
The trend is to emulate Erdogan.

Don't be saying that, the mandatory sentence for accusing the government of emulating Erdogan is 10 years.
Plus life imprisonment for anyone who ever affiliated with you, like the cashier at your supermarket and your mailman.
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8035 on: May 15, 2018, 04:06:16 am »

Dutch schools are concerned, because this year, for the first time ever, the central exams for all highschools will take place during the Ramadan. It is feared that many children will finish their highschool with bad results, or even fail them completely and redo the entire last year, because they are making exams all day on an empty stomach.
It might not be that much of a problem though. When interviewed, a majority of muslim youth says that when the hunger interferes with their abilty to focus too much, they will choose for their future career perspective instead of their religious strictness, and break the fast.

In slightly related news, the Dutch chapter of Pegida has announced that they will hold barbecues, making roast pork in front of mosque entrances, during Ramadan.

« Last Edit: May 15, 2018, 04:12:06 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Kagus

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8036 on: May 15, 2018, 04:33:33 am »

One thing is trying to function on an empty stomach, another is trying to do anything at all without drinking water all day. It got to be kind of a problem here in Norway, especially when Ramadan ended up falling in the middle of summer where we end up with 18-22 hours of full sunlight, depending on how far north you are. People were trying to eat and recuperate in between prayers in the 4 hour window between sunset and sunrise, and that's down here in the south where it's generally not as severe.

Eventually some imams got together and decided that Muslims in Norway should really only have to adhere to the spirit of the time, and should treat Norway as having the same day/night schedule as Mecca.

Personally, I think that's great. It's kind of a mean thought, but I figure it's a great step towards moderation and eventual secularism. The more that people agree on the old rules being outdated and unnecessarily rigid, the more people move away from extremism and choose for themselves to break away. It's selfish of me, I know, but I feel like it's to be encouraged.

Heck, the more conservative folks here have been paranoid about there being a government-funded mosque popping up somewhere. I say might as well go ahead, look at what state sponsorship did to the Lutheran church here, they're a bunch of damn kittens... Least extreme people around, and hemorrhaging members in a constant stream.


I don't think I've heard anything about concerns regarding Ramadan affecting high school exams here, but then again there's already an ingrained tradition for the students to go on a month-long bender right over finals anyways, so the Ramadan-observing students probably have a leg up on the situation.

Teneb

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8037 on: May 15, 2018, 04:37:29 am »

In slightly related news, the Dutch chapter of Pegida has announced that they will hold barbecues, making roast pork in front of mosque entrances, during Ramadan.
That's a huge dick move. Also, doesn't that qualify as religious discrimination? (Though I have no idea what Dutch laws on that are)
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martinuzz

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8038 on: May 15, 2018, 04:49:50 am »

In slightly related news, the Dutch chapter of Pegida has announced that they will hold barbecues, making roast pork in front of mosque entrances, during Ramadan.
That's a huge dick move. Also, doesn't that qualify as religious discrimination? (Though I have no idea what Dutch laws on that are)
Sadly, no, it falls under the freedom of demonstration. The city council of the city where it is planned is 'looking how to best accomodate' the protest. They might try to stop it on fire safety grounds, or maybe the mayor will step in and forbid it if he deems it a serious threat to public order, but that's not likely. Mayors have come under fire for using the public order argument too easily to forbid demonstrations.
« Last Edit: May 15, 2018, 04:52:02 am by martinuzz »
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Friendly and polite reminder for optimists: Hope is a finite resource

We can ­disagree and still love each other, ­unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist - James Baldwin

http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=73719.msg1830479#msg1830479

Egan_BW

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Re: The friendly and polite EU-related terrible jokes thread
« Reply #8039 on: May 15, 2018, 04:55:29 am »

fuck now i want some pork
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